Re: Sonrisa: Sam A & Cris M
But it was fucking terrifying, yeah? Him being her coping mechanism or whatever, because it meant she couldn't cope at all if he wasn't around. That was how they'd got here, yeah? To today. Because she wasn't strong enough to handle shit herself or whatever. He would say no or something, that they made each other stronger or something, and maybe straight and feeling good, well, maybe then she'd admit it was true. But right now, right now she felt fucking weak, and she felt like she'd fucked up everything good. She was drowning in that fucking feeling, and so she argued, yeah?
And Neil not arguing back, that wasn't a good thing.
"It is shit!" Loud. It felt good, being loud. "It's not fair! You deserve better. DON'T ARGUE." Which, yk, she knew didn't work. She knew he'd argue, yeah? If he didn't, then she'd think something was seriously wrong.
But he pulled her close, and she slid legs over his, and she pulled him closer still with fingers to his nape. She used that grip to nudge herself flat the fuck up against him. Belly to belly, and she wrapped her bare legs around his lower back, ankles resting against the floor and against his ass. "I am just justified." She muttered that. "And you wouldn't kill anyone just to kill them. You're not that guy. But I would absolutely fucking shoot up in your living room." Which she said so fucking stubborn, so fucking sure, but she did have to exhale soft when he said she loved him.
The words were still hard, yeah? But she nodded, and she pressed harder against the nape of his neck, urging him, like he could get closer, when he really fucking couldn't. "I really want a fucking hit." Quiet, yeah? A quiet, quiet fucking admission.