Re: [In-person: PJ and Atticus]
[She was trying to be as unconcerned as possible with everything going on around her, but she was scared. Of too many things.] I said like one sentence to someone in my general vicinity, but that was about the extent of the conversation. [She tilted her head backwards and looked up at him. And ignored the fact that it didn't feel very good.] Stupid isn't always terrible, you know. Can I help? Who did you meet?
[No one ever called her Parker, she liked it, she didn't know why, but when someone called her that it seemed nice somehow, even if she was in trouble, or being called the credit card company. Or being worrisome. It was a nice name, her father's name, and when she had a chance to own it, she did.] It wasn't great, but I just [she paused. She didn't think she could explain it if she wanted to. Which she did. But she didn't think it would be very easy to explain. Or that anyone would be able to make sense of it. And really, how could they?] It looked cozy in the middle of all those people.
[She gave another half shrug.]
Remember the barn? Down the end of it, there's another horse stall that I made a little more...Robust. It's not a terrible space. I mean, this isn't an ideal situation - but its for my own good. I'm injured. She's going to be injured in the same way, possibly worse depending on what happens when I change.
I don't know what to expect, I've never locked her up before. And I don't want her to associate you with being locked up and injured. [She didn't want Atticus in harms way, but she also wondered if there wasn't an opportunity to associate him with all the good things. But she also wasn't convinced it was worth the risk.] I can tell you what's out of the ordinary for me. I'm not tame, but I'm not a rabid beast either. I'll show my teeth when I'm pissy, or snap,. but I've never full on hurt anyone. I've been in one wolf fight. I had to remind myself to snarl at Matt when I was stuck in that trap so he wouldn't think anything weird was going on. But then I turned into a human while he was carrying me back and that threw that plan out the window.
I don't know what my body is going to do during this change. Too quiet, and too loud are both bad scenarios I think. Too quiet, means I'm feeling so badly, I can't even be grumpy. Too loud means I'm distressed. There's annoyed, and there's aggressive, and then there's unending aggression. Unending aggression could mean distress or injury. The bossy voice should work on annoyed, and probably even aggressive if you bring a snack when she howls. That could be all it takes.
The injuries, the locking her up, no pack, humans on a full moon...It's the exact opposite of everything I've ever known or had to deal with.