Re: [Call: Sam A/Cris M]
Now, understand, what I'm sayin' ain't no value judgement on Iris, okay? I'm just tellin' you how I see it. And what I see is her emotionally manipulatin' you. Here—Lemme just—Lemme look somethin' up, huh? [He pulls the phone away and taps a lil bit. He texts her a copy-pasted lil list.]
- Refusal to engage in general conversation - Not responding to questions or minimally responding - Intentionally withholding emotions and affection - Intentionally withholding physical contact - Refusing to make eye contact (or look at you) - Barely acknowledging your presence in a room - Displaying a general disinterest in your life - Crazy Making (gaslighting)
[Back on the phone.] Those are ways people use the silent treatment, and y'know what the silent treatment is, amor? It's emotional manipulation. It activates the same place in your brain, ¿sabes?—as physical pain does. What you're experiencin' ain't just you or fucked up. It's a natural response to that kinda passive aggressive behavior, to pain. You feel bad, somewhere inside you know you feel bad, even while you're glad they're back and talkin' to you. Them ignorin' the topic once they're back is them assertin' control again, takin' it from you. ¿Entiendes? What I'm sayin' is there're a lotta diff'rent kindsa narcissists, nena, but they do a lotta the same things. Here—[He looks at the phone again, brief.] "Being noticed is so close to being loved, that sometimes they feel the same. Being ignored is just as powerful." 'S'at make sense?