Re: Hugh C./Audrey C.
Only you know if it really sums it up, but I'll say this: You are not alone in feeling all of that. Like, I'm sitting here reading and nodding my head, cause I've been there and sometimes I'm still there, honestly.
I'm gonna start at the end and go up, ok?
I don't want to say that there is no right or wrong, but sometimes I think we can get too stuck in narrow constructs of what that means. And sometimes there's strict notions - like we shouldn't have sex outside of marriage - that are based on outdated bullshit like patriarchy and economics rather than what sex should be about. I mean there's a lot of people who'd say I shouldn't have sex with men, and I say bullshit. I love who I love, and I desire who I desire, and the important stuff isn't somebody else's opinion of right or wrong there.
I think if you ask yourself - what do I want, and then follow that question by will this bring good things to the other person, do they want this too? That may be more helpful in many cases than 'right or wrong'. Especially with the kind of things you're talking about there.
And as someone who has a chronic case of wanting to be liked: sometimes people won't and life goes on. Don't let it become a defining factor in what you do.