Maizie Wolfe (maizielou) wrote in remains_rpg, @ 2016-05-26 20:07:00 |
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Entry tags: | # 2019 [05] may, maizie wolfe, olivia jensen |
Who: Olivia Jensen and Maizie Wolfe
Where: the Oval Office, the LBJ
What: talking about worries instead of trying to sleep
When: late on 5/8
It was funny in a weird, sad kind of way the sounds that you noticed were missing when someone was, well, missing. Like Savannah occasionally shifting in her bed on the other side of the divider, the sheets rustling as she moved and that little sigh she made, settling into the new position. It wasn’t like she was loud or anything. Maizie was just used to the little noises of life that meant another person was in the room. Instead they just had the addition of Finn pacing by the door, letting out a soft whine every so often, wondering why Savannah wasn’t there to share the bed with. He’d lie down eventually, once he was reconciled to the fact that she wasn’t coming tonight. Maizie sympathized with the anxious dog: she felt the same sense of being unable to unwind enough to fall asleep. In a way, she even envied his ability to wander the Oval Office in the dark. If she tried, she would probably just trip over something, for one, but she’d also keep everybody else awake. The same way she was probably keeping Liv awake now, with her tossing and turning. “Sorry,” she murmured, changing which spot her arm lay in. “It's just -- y’know. Everything feels wrong.” "Hey, it's okay." Olivia had been nowhere near close to falling asleep, preoccupied with the missing person in their room and how unstable everything felt. Even the Ghouls were up to something. Though there wasn't much love lost between her and the people who lived on the streets and underground, their higher activity felt wrong all the same. She rolled onto her side and pressed a kiss to Maizie's forehead, biting her lip as she wondered what to say. Everything was wrong. There wasn't much negotiation there. But they had to keep their strength up or whatever, just in case, and sleeping was part and parcel of that. "You want to talk?" Nathan was still in the Oval Office, after all, but they could go out into the hallway or even up to the roof if they wanted to speak higher than whisper tones. Shaking her head, Maizie snuggled up closer to Liv. She didn’t want to risk bothering Nathan with their whispers, but she didn’t want to have to explain why they were leaving so late at night either. Maybe if she just made herself keep her eyes closed… But they popped open again almost immediately, leaving her staring up at the ceiling of the Oval Office. Despite her negative response mere seconds before, Maizie found herself speaking anyway. “How can this be happening again? First Dad, and now Savannah. What if -- ” Finishing that sentence aloud felt like a daunting task all of a sudden, so she cut off. But not quickly enough to stop her thoughts from continuing in that vein anyway. What if Savannah didn’t ever make it home either? Who would run the LBJ? What would happen to them? Did Nathan want to be saddled with two young adults, or would they be on their own? Aw, crap. Maizie sniffled and rubbed at her eyes. She really did not want to start crying again. Olivia brought a hand up to wipe a tear away, swiping her thumb gently across Maizie's cheekbone, and swallowed hard. She couldn't stand the thought of Savannah never coming home, but those concerns paled in comparison to how Maizie must be feeling. She hated seeing her like this, but with all the uncertainty -- and the eerie, upsetting way this whole situation echoed what had happened with her father last year -- Olivia didn't know if or how she could make it better. "It's never gonna make sense. But maybe we just have to keep going for now," she said, biting her lip as she looked at her girlfriend, her eyes just barely making out the outline of her nose and jawline in the dim night lighting. "How ever we can." Olivia had never been one for hope or optimism, but for Savannah's sake she hoped that trying it on now would pay off. Despite her tears, Maizie summoned up a weak smile at Liv’s words. The expression was lost in the lightless room, but the soft, half-amused noise she made wasn't. “That sounds like something Savannah would say. Or else, ‘Everything will work itself out.’ So you're probably right.” "It does, doesn't it?" And it was so obviously not the kind of thing Olivia would say on her own, either. She'd never seen the point in deluding herself into believing the impossible could happen. Now, though, with Savannah's absence ever-present in her mind, Olivia was wishing every hour, on the hour, that a miracle would happen. "It must be a sign." Maizie fell silent for a moment, trying to take the message to heart, and she shifted her arm until her hand could reach Liv’s hair. Something about playing with it, feeling the strands slip through her fingers, was soothing. Maizie hoped Olivia didn't mind her doing it. And that she didn't mind, too, the way Maizie was always reaching out for her, trying to keep her close. “I'm sorry this keeps happening,” she said suddenly, unable to stop this new worry from spilling out into words. “Sorry I'm always falling apart and leaning on you. If you need, I dunno, a break or something. I mean, I would understand. This stuff with Savannah is a lot.” "A break from what?" Olivia wasn't even attempting to keep her voice down anymore; the thought of putting things on hold between her and Maizie, even if it was just for half an hour, seemed, like, way too alarming. She figured it must be personal growth or whatever, since she vaguely remembered how she'd privately yearned for space almost a year ago before things between them had started. Now, though? She couldn't even imagine. And it wasn't like it was just Maizie going through this; her presence was a comfort to Olivia, too. Maizie gave a small shrug, as if the answer should be obvious. “You know, from all this emotional stuff.” That kind of thing made Liv uncomfortable, Maizie knew, and she had this vague fear that all this stress they were going through again, all the feelings that were constantly eddying around them, would just be too much. Olivia leaned forward for a kiss, lingering there briefly before she nestled her head on Maizie's shoulder. "Babe, you can't get rid of me that easy. I mean…. Previous attempts last year notwithstanding, or whatever." Olivia turned her head to land another kiss on Maizie's collarbone. "Especially not after you being there for me ever since what happened last fall. This is what we do. We're good at it. I just kinda wish we could get a little less practice, but. I'm not going anywhere." “Okay. Okay, good. I’m not going anywhere either, but y’know. I just wanted to be sure.” Mollified for the time being, Maizie kissed the top of Liv’s head and just tried to focus in on the two of them, letting everything else -- and all her worries -- recede for the night. Right here and right now Liv was warm and soft and comforting beside her, and so Maizie turned slightly, erasing the last millimeter of distance between them. The toes of her nearest foot trailed down the back of Liv’s calf. “I love you. Thanks for talking me down again. You’re the best, you know that?” "I love you, too." Olivia settled her arm around Maizie's waist, holding her close. She sighed, slow and quiet, trying to calm herself back down and hoping it'd rub off onto Maizie. Her heart felt tight in a weird, heavy way she couldn't quite explain, wishing things could be different. That they didn't have to keep going through shit like this right when they'd really settled into their stride as a family. She swallowed hard as her thoughts drifted to Kitty's children, wondering how they were holding up. Her hand tightened on Maizie's shirt in a way that could be construed as possessive, though in truth it was another attempt to settle herself down. "Just let me know if you want to talk more, okay?" “I will,” Maizie promised, nodding only slightly so it wouldn't disturb the way they were tangled together. And because she knew that Liv had her own worries about Savannah too, she added, “Same for you too, though.” On the other side of the divider, Finn jumped up onto Savannah’s bed with a soft thump and let out a sigh. It looked like he was finally settling down for the night, giving up on waiting for his mistress to return. Maizie knew she should sleep too, and so she tried closing her eyes again. There was nothing that she could do right now except look after herself, and look after Liv and Nathan and everybody else too. At least until Savannah came home. |