Zach (ex_bridges_b70) wrote in regulation, @ 2008-04-17 22:08:00 |
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Entry tags: | zacharias smith |
[Drabble]
Who: Judith Cellditch and Zacharias Smith
Where: Cellditch Galleries
When: Thursday, April 17
What: Packing. (takes place before Chris' owl)
Rating: G
Status: Closed; complete
"It's over, Zach," Judith said as she taped down the box, her touch still gentle in memory of the object inside. "I'm going to - oh, I don't know, go to school or work as a used broom salesperson or something." Zach looked up from where he was feeding Jemmy with wary eyes.
"You don't fucking mean that."
"Of course I do. Zach... I'm tired, okay? You try it for a while - putting your heart and soul into someone else's work, dealing with the egos-" And she shot him a weak grin. "It might be nice to concentrate on being mummy for a bit. Especially with Clare around - you know, you can't do that alone."
"Yeah, well, it's not like I fucking have much choice, is it?" he pointed out.
With a shrug, Judith said quietly, "I might've been wrong about Colm."
"Wrong? What the hell do you mean, wrong?" Zach pulled the toddler off his lap, nodding at Clare who ran over to take the bowl. Feeding Jemmy was about the only thing that consistently made her laugh. "He's not... Christ, Jude, he can't... look. He doesn't love me. He doesn't fucking love anything."
She sighed, turning a strand of purple hair around her finger. "Well, he cares enough to ask how you are, at least. And maybe - maybe, you and I - maybe, people our age are too old or too young for some grand passion. I don't like seeing you alone, Zach. Three years is a long time."
It was a long time. He had to give her that. But while he could burn like supernova, intense and brilliant, there had been few men in his life to spark that painful longing. And women, still fewer, and for entirely different reason. It was longing that came at the presence of fury, at anger - at those who were strong enough to withstand passion, to absorb it, to make it their own. Oddly, Zach thought, Colm had not been one of them. He had simply seemed it at the time.
"This is the part," Zach said, trying to break free of his thoughts, "where we both make a fucking pact to marry when we're thirty if we don't fucking have anyone, isn't it?"
"No." Judith's voice was strangled. "This is the part where I tell you I'm getting married." She extended her hand, a small stone glittering on top of her fingers. He could see that it was glass pretending to be diamond.
"That's fucking impossible." His mouth went dry.
"Zach - it was time."
"He doesn't have a goddamn job - I know you fucking caught him with that bint - he's just - fuck, Jude, why?"
"I'm tired of being alone. He said -"
"Getting married won't solve your fucking problems!" Zach shouted. "Christ!" He kicked the door, gesturing at Clare. She stood, wrinkling her nose at him but saying nothing. There was nothing to say, he realized and he thought of all she'd said, thought of her sudden change of heart and understood. "Go ahead and sell it. All of it. To him."
"Colm?"
"Yeah." He stared at his shoe. She wasn't the only one who could sacrifice. "Maybe I was wrong."