He'd been prepared for her to never touch him again, to be unable to stomach it. So to have her suddenly in his lap, clinging to him like he was still someone that could keep her safe, knocked him off balance. His hands continued to tremble as he touched her, as gently as he always had. One hand cradled the back of her head, the other curled against her waist. "I've never felt less perfect in my life, Siobhan," he admitted, the words dragged out of him and whispered into her hair.
He had to close his eyes once more when she promised she still loved him. Could she? And yet, she had loved him for more than ten years. Had loved him when he'd been 17 with no practical idea of how sex even worked that he hadn't learned from the whispers of his peers. She'd loved him through everything, and he knew that no matter how hard he'd tried he'd always been someone not everyone could love. He bowed his head against her shoulder, trying to breathe past the lump in his throat. "I love you too," he sighed. It was so selfish, to want to keep her, to want to keep everything the same. "Always." Right now, he didn't know what always would look like for them.