"You do," Max insisted. "I haven't been miserable. I know how lucky I am to have you, to have met you, to want the same things you want." If he could kiss her right now, would it show her? Prove to her he could really do this? He stroked his thumb across her cheek instead. He'd always wanted to be gentle and loving with her, not passionate. He'd thought she liked it. Now, he wondered if it made him weak. He still wanted to hold her, though. Protect her. Maybe not the way she wanted, not the way Higgs would have. "I want to get married and have a house and become parents," he said, more quietly. It had always been his plan, and he wanted to be a father, and for Siobhan to be mother to their children.
The question of how, though, cut him. He knew they could, infrequently and when Siobhan orchestrated. That could hardly make her feel wanted. "I'll be better," he said again, wanting so desperately to be able to give her that, for both their sakes. "Maybe I can -" Well, Max didn't really know what to suggest. He'd do anything for Siobhan, anything to make her happy, if only someone could tell him what it was.