Re: owl What exactly do you want from me, George? I love Alicia. I have always loved her. I am not and may never be in a position to make her happy. I realise that perhaps, if I had realised this two or three years ago, you could have been. If I had pushed for the divorce, if I had allowed myself to give her up. I get that. But she didn't ask me for one either, so perhaps your romance was always doomed from the beginning? Nonetheless, I have a lot of things that I need to sort out about my life and they might never get solved. That's not fair on her.
I don't owe you an explanation, I'm sure we're both aware of that. There are things I can't talk about right now, to you or to anyone else, including Alicia. That is also not fair on her. I am not in a place where I can be good for her. So I rather she is happy on her own or with someone else than risk her not being happy but being with me.
You make Lydia happy and she makes you happy. My threats are mostly because I don't want that to get fucked up. And maybe a little because sometimes I'd really like to break your fingers. But that's only occasionally. And mostly in unreasonable annoyance.
I am sorry I've disappointed her. I think I might even be a little sorry I've disappointed you. But I am a lot sorry I've disappointed myself. None of that will make me magically any more likely to make Alicia happy.