Kind to the point of doormat. (primlyrose) wrote in reduxpitch, @ 2016-07-15 13:23:00 |
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Primrose placed the dish with the roast chicken and vegetables in the center of the table that she had set up in the garden. There was also a green salad, fresh fruit, and wine, which Uncle Sirius had helped her select. She had strung fairy lights in the trees around the table, though it was still early enough in the season that it wouldn't get dark for several hours yet.
Her goal was a casual dinner, but, as with everything Prim did, there was a touch of the old-fashioned to it, which gave the space an air of formality. Her dress, she felt, was whimsical with its ice cream cones, but she fussed and worried and carried herself straight. She wanted her aunt and uncle to like the meal, to enjoy the evening. She did not want to disappoint them, though they had never, in the seven years she'd been with them, once told her they were disappointed in her.
After pouring the wine, and making sure the space was warded against summer bugs that would be interested in their meal, Prim stuck her head in through the kitchen door. "Dinner is ready," she called before retreating to the table again to wait for her aunt and uncle to join her.
--
It was sweet that Prim had wanted to make them dinner, and that she'd gone to the trouble to send invitations and all. James appreciated all the effort she was putting into it, even if he didn't think it was necessary. They all lived there, after all. Still, it was very nice of her to want to make a family dinner for the three of them and make it special.
He hadn't wanted to linger too closely, like he was waiting for it to be ready, but he'd also not wanted to be late or seem like he'd forgotten. So when the time rolled around he made sure to be in the kitchen, leaning against the counter and reading the evening edition of the Prophet to keep busy. He glanced over the top of it when Prim called inside, folding it to set down on the counter and glancing toward the entryway of the kitchen.
“Ready, Lils?”
--
Lily had been extremely touched when she’d received the invitation from Prim. The fact that the younger woman had gone to such lengths when it would have been so much simpler to offer the invitation in person spoke volumes to Lily. This was an event that should be taken seriously and treated with respect. She trusted her niece to ask if she needed help, but she also didn’t think that Prim would actually need anything. She was a bright, talented, capable girl, albeit with some self-image difficulties, but who didn’t have those? Lily was sure that Prim’s evening would be perfect in every way.
Lily was in the living room when dinner time arrived, curled up in her favorite chair with a thick book open in her lap. She hadn’t really taken in much of the last handful of pages because her mind had wandered, so she was grateful to hear her name called. Smiling, she snapped the book shut and set it on the side table.
“Ready,” she replied as she rose from the chair and entered the kitchen. She reached for her husband’s hand to go with him out into the garden.
--
Prim smiled at her aunt and uncle when they joined her outside. She waved them to their seats, waiting until they sat before sitting herself. "Please help yourselves," she said, indicating the food. "Despite appearances, this is a very casual meal." She shrugged in a self-deprecating way, smiling at them.
"Uncle Sirius helped me pick the wine. He assured me it would go well with chicken, though, despite his notes, I'm still not entirely sure what that means. It all tastes vaguely fruity and bitter to me."
--
James gave his wife a quick kiss on the cheek before leading her out to the garden, where it was all done up beautifully for their dinner. He let go of her hand once they were to the table so she could sit, a warm smile on his face as he took in the table before them. It was just their garden, but she'd made it look like something quite special.
“Prim, this looks incredible,” he said, offering her a smile. “And if Sirius said it would be good, I'm sure it is. He knows a thing or two about that.”
--
Lily was definitely impressed by the thought and work that Prim had put into the evening. She paused at the end of the table, just looking over everything that was laid upon it. “Incredible, yes,” she agreed. Her eyes flicked up to find her niece. “You have done an astounding job, this looks wonderful.”
She laughed a bit as she took her seat. “Yes, many wines taste like that, if I’m honest, especially at the beginning. I’m sure this one is an excellent choice.”
--
Prim flushed, pleased they liked the look of it and smiled at her surrogate parents. "'At the beginning' as in 'before the alcohol numbs your taste buds', or the general beginning before you learn to taste the differences?" She grinned at her aunt as she scooped some fruit into the little bowl above her plate. "I understand the notion of acquired taste, but do you actually acquire a taste for it, or do you simply become numb to it?"
This wasn't the conversation she wanted to have with them, but Prim wasn't ready to jump into discussing the possibility of her moving out in the relatively near future. It was still a thought that frightened her, which was why she wanted to talk to both of them, for advice. But she was happy to discuss something mundane for a little bit.
--
James chuckled, taking a sip of his wine and letting the taste of it linger on his tongue for a moment. “I'm sure it can be both, though a bit more of the actually acquiring a taste for it option. Some things your palette likes, or doesn't, or needs to get used to. Like how I hated brussel sprouts until I was thirty, then they were suddenly delicious. The numbness bit comes more with other things, in my experience.”
He leaned back in his chair, enjoying the way the lights above in the trees seemed to flicker like stars, even though it wasn't yet dark enough to mistake them for those. Glass still in hand, he raised it slightly to the two ladies sat around the table with him. “To what looks like a delicious meal with two of my favorite people.”
--
“I meant that it is an acquired taste,” Lily replied, “but I do suppose a certain numbness comes with drinking too much of it. But…” And she smiled rather playfully. “By that point, you don’t really mind much, anyway.”
She went quiet as James raised his glass and she mimicked him. “Agreed,” she said, tilting the glass to each in turn before taking a small drink. “I know I’ve said it already,” she went on as she set the glass down and reached for the salad bowl, “but this looks fabulous. Is there an occasion?”
--
Prim raised her glass to her uncle before sipping the wine, a slightly dubious look on her face. It was better than some of the ales her uncle had her try, but she still wasn't sure about alcohol. She set her glass down with a small shrug. "It will be okay if I never acquire the taste, yes?" The chicken was already carved, and she helped herself to meat, potatoes, and carrots before handing her uncle the serving utensils.
Looking at her aunt then quickly away, Prim chewed on her lip, thinking. Of course Aunt Lily would know there was a reason for this, and there was no way for Prim to play casual and nonchalant. "I would like to preface what I'm about to ask you with: this will not happen for some time. I need to be sure I have enough savings in case something out of my control happens."
Taking a deep breath, she folded her hands in her lap and looked between her aunt and uncle. "Now that Uncle James is home, and I have some experience living sort of on my own, I am beginning to think about considering moving out on my own. Or, maybe with a friend so that I do not become a complete hermit." She sipped her wine, trying to dispel the sudden dryness in her mouth. "I don't feel like I'm being forced out, and I don't want you to think that I'm thinking about considering this because I don't appreciate you putting me up. This is home, and it always will be, I just can't help but wonder if it may be time, is all. But I wanted to get your opinions and reassure you that it will not happen tomorrow or next week. It may not happen until next year, but it is something I'm thinking about."
--
“Of course it's alright if you never acquire a taste for it,” James assured her, taking another sip before setting his wine down so he could get some of the food on his plate.
The fact that Prim felt the need to preface the cause for the dinner wasn't particularly reassuring, and he tried not to let that get to him as he carefully moved some chicken and potatoes onto his plate before passing it on to Lily. His gaze focused on Prim as she spoke, unsure of what to feel. Of course this day had been coming - she was an adult, after all. He did feel slightly responsible, despite her saying otherwise, as his presence in the house again seemed to be a factor for her decision. But was there really a need to feel responsible for someone deciding they wanted to take a further step into adulthood such as moving out of their parents’ house?
“I do hope you aren't feeling as though you should go now that I'm living here again,” he said after a moment, glancing over to Lily before looking to his niece again. “For me, at least, all I want is for you to be happy and comfortable. It sounds like you've put a lot of thought into this, and you're not making a rash decision and moving out before you know you're able to support yourself, so…”
--
“That is perfectly fine,” Lily assured her niece, “not everyone likes wine.” Though she didn’t understand exactly why, but she wasn’t about to judge.
As Prim continued, Lily felt a sudden rush of a handful of emotions. Pride was there, but also fear and sadness and loneliness. The same thing she’d felt when her other three children had left to make their own way in the world. She knew that none of them could stay home forever, and that this was the time for herself and her husband to embrace, but that didn’t make it too much easier to imagine the house just that much emptier.
She quietly loaded vegetables and chicken onto her plate before joining her hands and resting her chin on the laced fingers, listening as the other two said their bit.
“It’s not that I want you to leave,” she said slowly, “but you are an adult and there comes a point when adults need to go be adults on their own for a while.” She smiled faintly. “If this is the time for you, then you have my full support. I will miss having you here, of course. But I cannot keep you forever, as much as I’d like to.”
--
Prim looked at her uncle and shook her head. "It is because you're home, but it's not for any negative reasons. I am glad you're home. I never fully understood the separation." She had admitted as much to both of them, but her ears still burned, and she quickly continued because it wasn't her place. "You belong here, with us. But because you are home, I won't feel as guilty about leaving you," she looked at Lily. "You need someone to keep you from becoming a complete hermit as much as I do, especially now that Evan is building you an attic office."
Her hands were clenched in her lap, and she tried to keep all of her tenseness there, making her shoulders and face relax though her knuckles were white. "You'll have me for some time yet. I promise. I'm not fully ready to go anywhere. I know I can fend for myself. You have both taught me well, but I'm not emotionally ready."
There was a lot of growing up that Prim knew she still needed to do. Not in the sense that she needed to learn how to budget, balance accounts, or cook: she could do all of those things. She needed to grow up in the sense of believing in herself, of knowing how to handle her ups and downs without panicking. She knew these weren't things that anyone could really teach her. "I'm still finding my gumption," she continued softly. "I'm still finding my spine and my worth. I need to be comfortable with who I am, and I need to know and feel that I have the ability to look adversity in the face and come through the other side." She frowned. "If that makes sense."
--
A soft smile quirked at the corners of James’ mouth because yes, this is where he belonged and no, he hadn't really understood the separation either. He'd understood that it was what Lily had needed, and he was there to provide her what she needed - even if that meant giving her space by not being there. It had all worked out, so he could look at it with peace and a more positive view than if it hadn't, he supposed.
“I'll keep your aunt from being a hermit,” he promised, his smile turning into a bit more of a grin. “It's been a lifelong pursuit of mine this far, might as well keep it up.” At the rest of what she said, he leaned forward to be able to reach her hand and give it a gentle squeeze. “It all makes sense, and you know that even when you do move out, we’ll still be right here and you'll always be able to come to us, or come home, whenever you want or need. You've grown so much, Prim, but it doesn't matter how old you get or grown up seeming or any of that, you're always going to be one of our kids.”
--
Lily rolled her eyes a bit at the both of them, but she was smiling all the same. She knew perfectly well how easy it was to get lost in work and not emerge for days on end. And really, she appreciated the company the both of them had provided, and the urgings to get out and leave work behind for a few hours.
Not that she would admit these things in this moment, but they were still very true.
“These things are part of becoming an adult,” she said, “everyone has gone through them, no matter what their background. Not everyone shows it, though.” She let out a little sigh as she speared a potato on her fork. “Though, you have been through more than most and you have come out shining, I honestly believe that you can do anything, and we will be here to offer our support and catch you if you need it.”
--
Prim's nose tickled, and she had to look away from her aunt and uncle to keep her eyes from welling up. She hadn't expected them to say anything different than they did, but she was still touched by their support and understanding. And she was relieved by their assurances that she could always come home. She carried, still, the fear that the doors of Potter Cottage would be closed to her.
"That's what I really needed to know," she said quietly. "That I can come home if I need to, and that you'll be here." She swallowed hard and looked up at them. "I know it contradicts everything you say to and do for me, and that it's completely illogical, but I needed that reassurance that you..." Prim trailed off, shrugging. They weren't like her parents. They wouldn't disown her or turn their backs on her.
"I love you both very much."
--
James gave her hand one last little squeeze before letting it go so he could take a bite of his chicken - as it would have been rude to ignore his food completely considering the effort she'd put into making it. He knew it wasn't anything they'd done to make her feel like she wouldn't be able to come home, but he also knew what she'd been through before she'd come to their house.
“I solemnly swear not to turn your bedroom into some sort of den for myself,” James said with a good natured smile. “You will always be welcome here, Prim. Always. I love you very much, too.”
--
Lily filed that statement away because it was not the focus of this evening, but if it had come up under different circumstances, she would have been absolutely in favor of James having his own little cave. It was only fair given the state of disarray the attic was in currently just for her. It was certainly something to discuss a little later on.
“We are not going anywhere,” she said, “and this is your home as much as it is ours or your... Cousins." She'd almost said 'brothers and sister.' Oops. "And I love you, too," she added. She then settled back in her seat and added a chunk of chicken to the fork with the potato and began to eat. Her eyes closed briefly with pleasure. "This is excellent."
--
"Once I've vacated it, I would understand if you did, though. It only makes sense to use the space you have in ways that aren't simply collecting dust and housing nostalgia." It was weird to think about her room being used for something else, but it would have been anyway, if she hadn't come to live with them when she was twelve. She didn't voice that thought, though. By the time she was invited to live with them, it had been her bedroom. She hadn't known it as anything else, and she wasn't ready to change that knowledge.
Prim smiled at her aunt. "Thank you. I didn't make dessert. I got one of Daisy's pies and stopped at Fortescue's on the way home this afternoon for two pints of their vanilla bean." She felt more relaxed and was able to pick up her fork and begin to eat."
--
James shook his head, gesturing airily with his fork. “It's not housing nostalgia, it's keeping your room available should you need or want it. If we turned it into something else, where would you sleep when you came to visit?”
He truly had no plans of turning anything in the house into something else. The attic was enough of a project, and it made sense. Lily needed and office, so that was what it would be. He, on the other hand, didn't need anything. There was no reason to turn one of the kids’ rooms into some hideaway for himself just because. “Well now that's just smart thinking, because Daisy’s pies are delicious and ice cream is always good.”
--
“It’s a little bit nostalgia,” Lily admitted, “but mostly practical. You shouldn’t have to sleep on the sofa or a camp bed in your own home when you come for Christmas.” Because that was going to happen, there would be no arguing. Okay, she wasn’t going to demand, but it was certainly her plan that the children would gather. Plans could change, she supposed.
She was happy to know that her other daughter’s pie would be featured, and so she vowed to make it to the end of dinner without stuffing herself on Prim’s excellent cooking. It was a nice touch, she thought. Everything was just so nice.
--
Prim allowed a companionable silence to fall over the table while they all enjoyed some of the food. She was okay with quiet and lulls in conversations. She didn't feel the need to fill them with idle chatter. She was never any good with small talk, anyway.
But the silence allowed her to worry and think, and that wasn't always a good thing. Setting down her fork, she sat back in her chair and looked between them. "I may need you to tell me to stop being silly. I think you know why without me saying anything, and I'm trying really hard not to ask if you're absolutely sure, because I know you'd tell me if there was something I could be doing differently or if you thought something was a bad idea or wrong or not the thing to do." She hated, sometimes, that she worried about things as hard as she did, and she knew they were used to it, but she hated that they had to be used to it.
--
The sound of chirping birds filled the dinner as they ate, and it was a perfect background to keep it from being too quiet. James set his silverware on his plate and looked over to his niece as she spoke, an easy and gentle smile taking over his features.
“Rest assured that we are here to be helpful however you may need,” he said, raking his hand back through his hair to push it away from his face. “If that's telling you you're being silly, I think we can manage it.”
--
When Prim spoke, breaking the silence, Lily laid her fork down and folded her hands on the table. She studied her niece for several moments while James replied, just appreciating how self-aware the younger woman was, which gave her hope.
“You’re not being silly,” she said gently. "Wanting your own space and your own independence is an important step in growing up, and I think you're going about it exactly the right way." She settled back in her chair and lifted her wineglass. "I really am very proud of you."
--
Prim took a deep breath and forced her mind to calm down. It always helped to hear these from her aunt and uncle. One day, perhaps, she would 'hear' the words without having to actually have them said. She could hope.
"Thank you," she said, encompassing her uncle's assurance that they could and would talk her down and her aunt's compliment. She raised her glass, mirroring her aunt's movement, and sipped. After a moment, she turned the conversation to other things and listened as her aunt and uncle talked about anything that came to mind.
She was glad Aunt Lily knew there was an ulterior motive to dinner. It meant they were able to get the 'business' out of the way quickly and enjoy their evening. She was so happy Uncle James was home. Things felt like they were getting back to a new normal, and that was a comfort to Prim who was working on growing as a person, and growing came with change, which she didn't always like.