There was just no point in dealing with all of that right now anyway. In the long run, did any of it really matter? Everyone fought. Maybe it was best to just leave it at that. Besides, she wasn’t sure when she’d see him again, and she didn’t want to waste this time being angry or going over who did or said what.
Her smile faltered with his, only to be replaced by a look of genuine concern. She hadn’t meant to shift the conversation into something so serious, but apparently, she had done just that. “But you’ll still have Alexei, Veejay, Luca, Ophelia, and everyone. Provided, of course, that you and Alexei don’t do anything stupid and get yourselves kicked out.” She grinned at him though the smile didn’t quite reach her eyes.
And her smile fell completely for a moment as he mentioned France before she composed herself. But she couldn’t say that she really liked the thought of him doing God knows what in Paris with Bastien. She’d be less worried if he was spending his summer with Jude or anyone else, but she knew Bastien too well.
“Seeing France?” She teased. She was smiling again, but if was watching close enough, James would probably be able to tell that the gesture was slightly forced. “Somehow, I can’t quite imagine Bastien showing you the Lourve.” She figured that this trip would be much more about drunken debauchery than actually seeing what France or Europe had to offer. She reckoned that he’d come back and be unable to count just how many girls he had slept with.
So she was jealous. But she was all too aware that she had no right to be. After all, she had been the one to turn down any and all offers of a more physical relationship until he had just stopped asking. And honestly, she didn’t regret that; she didn’t want to be just another girl he’d shagged, and she doubted that their friendship would have lasted if they had ever fooled around. But that didn’t especially comfort her or prevent her from being upset by the fact that he’d be spending his summer with girls who weren’t her.
But at least he’d be with a friend. She’d worried about what he’d be doing that summer, and she’d been concerned that he was going home to an empty house. While she couldn’t really say that she was altogether pleased with his plans, she recognized that that was entirely selfish of her and that she should be relieved that Bastien have given him a place to stay. Maybe it wasn’t ideal for her but that didn’t matter. Getting away would most likely be good for him anyway, and that was what was important.
“How long are you going to be there then?” she asked. She’d wanted to get right to the point and ask if he’d have any time for her that summer, but that had struck her as too needy to say aloud and she wasn’t completely ready to let him know that she did need him.