To:not_yet_defined From:fansee with my bestest love! Title: Merry Christmas from Anita Gift Request: Humor/fluff - b/j and any other characters would be welcome Rating: PG-13 for some naughty language Summary:not_yet_defined wanted a fic that would make her laugh. I hope this one at least gives her a smile.
Thumpa, thumpa, thumpa. Christmas night at Babylon. Glitter falling from the ceiling. Santa gyrating to the music, his full beard falling to his chest and sequins frosting the crotch of his red velvet bikini.
Justin shut his eyes and concentrated on the welcome tingle of beer on his tongue - simple, uncomplicated beer. Not the near-lethal version of a highly alcoholic eggnog Debbie had served last night nor the healthful, low fat version that filled his mother's punch bowl this afternoon. Plain, old Heineken, a trance version of "Little Drummer Boy," and - around here somewhere – Brian: the perfect antidote to too much holiday cheer.
Where is Brian? Justin wondered. He looked around. It's been at least an hour since I last saw him. Justin leaned over the bar and looked left, then right. No Brian. He took several steps back and repeated the process. Nope. Then he turned and surveyed the dance floor, looking for a long, lean body, in black leather pants and a black shirt, dancing among the more festively-clad bodies. No dice. He sighed and started worming his way through the dancers, toward the back room. He's probably getting his dick sucked…I hope. I hope that's all he's doing.
Half way across the dance floor, something unusual – something very much out of the ordinary – registered in his brain. He stopped where he was, muttering his apologies to the dancers his sudden stop affected, and looked over toward the stairs that led up to the balcony. There was Brian, sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall.
Justin muttered, "What the fuck?" to himself and changed course.
"What the fuck, Brian? Are you all right?"
Brian smiled up at him. "Hi, Justin. I'm O.K. In fact, I'm better than O.K. I'm great. How are you?"
"I'm fine. C'mon, get up."
"Don't wanna. I'm comfortable."
Justin sat down, Indian style, facing Brian. He leaned forward, trying to see Brian's pupils, but the dim light and the flashing strobe made it impossible. "Brian, what did you take?"
"I dunno."
"What do you mean, You don't know?"
"Anita gave me a Crim-mus present. Dunno what it was, but it made me feel good." His eyes suddenly focused and he looked at Justin sharply. "Made me feel horny. Made me wanna fuck you."
"What a surprise. Come on, get up, and I'll take you home, and you can fuck me."
"Good idea." Brian pulled his legs under him, put one hand on the wall, and – somewhat to Justin's surprise – stood up. "Go home an' fuck."
"Right."
Brian looked thoughtful, then shook his head. "No, won't work. Can't do it. And that's making me sad."
Justin looked closely. He couldn't be sure, but Brian's eyes did seem to be filling with tears. "Of course, it'll work. We'll go home, we'll fuck, and then we'll go to sleep and you'll feel fine." Privately he had some doubts about the "feeling fine" part, but this didn't seem to be the right time to discuss a possible hangover.
"No, can't do it. I wanna fuck you raw, but we can't do it."
Justin's stomach lurched. "Brian, you've been in the back room and you fucked somebody, right?"
Brian looked at him owlishly. "I haven't been in the backroom at all, not today. An' I haven't fucked anybody."
"Are you sure?"
Brian smiled and patted Justin on the cheek. "I'm sure. I know when I've been in the backroom and I know when I've fucked."
Justin rubbed his face. Brian never patted faces. "What the hell did you take?"
"I tol' you, Anita's Crim-mus present. I was happy, but now I'm sad 'cause I can't fuck you bareback."
"Let's go home, and you'll fuck me raw. If you haven't fucked anyone else since you swallowed whatever shit Anita gave you, it's O.K."
"No, s'not. Never fuck without a condom. Keep you with me for a long, long time. Be careful and keep you healthy for years and years and years and…."
"Brian, we're monogamous. We've been monogamous for over a year now. We fuck raw all the time. If you haven't done something you shouldn't…."
"You mean fuck somebody I shouldn't?"
"Exactly."
"I haven't. That's why I'm horny. I'm glad you showed up so we can fuck." He looked puzzled. "Where were you, anyway?"
Justin sighed. He held out his hand. "Give me your keys. We'll get our coats and then I'm taking you home."
"My keys are in my coat. M'pants are too tight for keys."
"You're right. I remember you putting the keys in your coat pocket." Justin linked his arm through Brian's and steered him toward the door.
They were almost there when Brian came to an abrupt halt. "You can't drive."
"Sure I can."
"No. Can't drive when you're drunk…and you mus' be drunk."
"I've had two beers since we got here…what?...two hours ago. I can drive."
Brian started to shake his head and lurched to one side. Justin grasped his arm more tightly and managed to keep him upright. "Next to you, Brian, I'm stone cold sober."
"Mus' be drunk. If you weren't drunk, you'd know I'd never fuck somebody else. Love to fuck you raw too much. Love you. Wouldn't do it."
Justin smiled. "O.K. I believe you."
"Good, 'cause you know, 'In vino veritas.'"
"Not that what Anita gave you was vino."
"But still veritas."
"Yeah, Brian, I heard you. I love you, too. Now let's go home."