Who: Andromeda & Regulus What: talking about the family drama When: Tuesday Where: Grimmauld Place Warnings: TBD Status: Incomplete
Finding something of an ally in Regulus had been entirely unexpected. Andromeda had held out the most hope for sympathy from her sisters, especially Cissy; she'd hoped that they might understand and care for her enough to listen to her, even if her parents wouldn't. Regulus, on the other hand, had stopped talking to Sirius even when Andromeda could not let him go; even if he sympathized, she expected that he would do the same for her. She hadn't really underestimated him: she still thought that if his parents ordered him not to speak to her, he was likely to obey. But he also seemed to understand her situation in a way that her sisters-- probably because they had always gotten most of their parents' attention, and thus never really doubted that they had their parents' approval-- could not. And that was the problem, really. The disregard she'd been shown in this case was not the first time that Andromeda had felt pushed aside, overlooked, or neglected; she knew that she was the 'other', the least of the sisters by just about anyone's reckoning, and had spent her entire life hoping for a moment in which she would feel important and prized by her parents.
Arranging her marriage would have been the perfect time for them to show that they cared. To at least pretend that they had done any of it for her benefit. If they had written to her about it, if they had talked about how happy they were about the match, about the honor of making her family proud, all the things that she had heard over the years-- she probably would have done it. She had always expected to go through with the marriage that her parents made for her; she wanted to marry and have children, she just hadn't wanted it to feel like this. To feel like they were more glad to finally be getting rid of her than to see their daughter married properly, continuing the family line. And they could not see how they were doing anything wrong, either, which did not help matters at all. Andromeda found herself wondering if they had been set up in much the same way-- if the years of talking about this were supposed to continue the illusion that this was something wonderful and honorable, even when she was faced with the reality of it. Perhaps she was supposed to be fooled, still; perhaps their real mistake was that they had not brainwashed her enough before.
Whatever it was, it was ugly, and it felt rather hopeless. Regulus had given her hope, for a few moments at least; if he could come around to her side, perhaps her family would too. But after she'd stopped writing to him, after she'd stepped back from the conversation, Andromeda realized that she was probably wrong. They were too similar, she and Regulus: the fact that he agreed with her was probably because he was in the same position she was. Was he able to see through the illusion of grandeur, too? Had he always felt the same way she had, or had it been Sirius's departure that had cracked the facade? She didn't know, but her hope had faded almost as quickly as it had come.
She still wanted to see him, though, while she still could, but it was with a heavy heart that she threw the Floo powder on the fire and stepped through. From one Black family home to another; the two houses had a very similar feeling to them, of age and history and lineage, which Andromeda had always found both powerfully moving and oppressive all at once. Now more than ever it verged on stifling, but she kept her composure, allowing herself to feel a little bit of hope again. Not for her situation with her parents, but hope that she might not lose her cousin, even if she lost the rest of her family. And if it went really well, if Regulus dared to continue being in touch with her once her parents turned their back on her for good, maybe-- just maybe-- he would chance the same for Sirius. She had not the faintest idea what the odds of that were, but daring to hope for something good to come out of this-- especially for Sirius, the only member of her family that she knew she would never lose-- made it a little bit easier.
Politely, she greeted her aunt and uncle, and tried not to worry about the suspicion in their gazes; then she was finally allowed to go with Kreacher, following him to find Regulus. When she saw her cousin, she smiled at him, genuine despite her obvious emotional exhaustion. "Hello," she said. "Do you mind if I give you a hug?"