I just don't much care for being dressed down simply for making jokes. I realize Clara feels I'm overbearing in my teasing, but she really needs to get the fuck over it. I mean, it's not as if I haven't seen and heard worse in my lifetime, and I'm expected to simply move on and not be hurt by things.
He had the audacity to say I know exactly how she feels in some ways and that she and I should get along and support each other. As if that will ever happen? The girl has never made an effort to speak to me other than to tell me when I was stuck as a child that I too easily get into trouble. Which, I am POSITIVE was an issue because of a joke I made about our Doctor for the love of all things holy.
I honestly just want to go back home, and if there was a way to do that right now, I would. Immediately. As much as I love you, as much as I love the friends I have made here, I would rather forget this time than have this Doctor telling me to make nice with his girlfriend and treating me like I am the issue constantly. I don't ask him to spend time with me so that she doesn't feel angry or jealous. I don't ask for his time, because I feel it would make her upset. I make jokes, yes, because I have always done that, and to shut that part of myself off is asking me to stop being myself completely and I am so angry right now I can't even begin to fathom how I'm not hurting things.
And worst of all of it is how much I miss my old life, no matter how quiet it was sometimes. No matter how uncertain. Because at least there, there was the possibility of hearing his voice and finding his hand in the dark.