Agitatus Original poster: snapesdarkling
Just so you know I still luff you all...
TITLE: Agitatus
RATING Mature
BETA: *shifty eyes*
AUTHOR: snapesdarkling
Its the last day of Hogwarts for Harry. SEverus is not happy.
Severus Snape was agitated. The entire leaving feast had passed without the boy glancing even once in his direction; now Dumbledore was standing up to say farewell to those who on the threshold of their adult lives, were about to leave Hogwarts. All eyes were on the ancient mage as he stood in his magnificent purple robes. All eyes that is, except for the Potions Master’s. Snape’s gaze was fixed on the dark-haired young man seated halfway up the Gryffindor table. He had been staring like this for most of the evening, willing Potter to look up and knowing that if he did, if his eyes flicked for even an instant in his direction, everything would change.
Snape burned for the boy, had been tormented by his presence for seven years and now, just when Potter was within reach, Snape could feel him slipping through his fingers. He had left it too late. Now, he would have to initiate, reach out, grasp and while grasping, hope that his grip stayed strong and true. For Potter was free and the world beckoned and Snape saw the lure of life shine in his eyes.
He did not know if it was love. He only knew that the void left by Potter’s departure would ache long and deep within him. When he thought about it his manner became even more caustic so that none approached him. Alone, he contemplated Potter’s eyes, his mouth; the smile that could almost make Snape’s heart sing. He remembered the day during the summer when he had seen Potter take his shirt off after Quidditch practise. Sweat had glistened on his smooth chest and as he moved, muscles played under his skin. He had been on his way to the showers, nonchalant, his state of tired satisfaction evident in the slow way he walked and the languid movement of the shirt as he wiped the perspiration from his body and messy hair.
When he had looked up it was into Snape’s eyes and in that moment, the man knew that Potter saw there what he had kept hidden for so long. At once he resented the boy for discovering his vulnerability and had retreated behind his mask of cold indifference, his eyebrow and upper lip raised in characteristic derision, all the while craving the touch of that damp, smooth skin, those warm, full lips.
Then Potter had brushed past him, close, deliberately close; so close that his shoulder grazed Snape’s chest and the musky boy-sweat smell of him reached Snape’s nose. Then the world had fallen away leaving only that touch, that fragrance and the soft sound of Potter’s voice as he said, “Excuse me Professor. I need to get to the shower room.”
Alone in his bed at night, Snape drove himself to madness imagining the sensation of sliding between Potter’s buttocks and deep into the heat of his young body. He pictured Potter’s face, his cock, his arse; he heard his voice crying out in ecstasy, imagined him struggling to free himself as Snape bound him. He imagined taking him against his will, forcing him down onto his knees and his mouth down onto his cock, holding him there whimpering and resistant until Snape came and came and came…
Afterwards, Snape wept.
The sound of hundreds of cheering students snapped Snape out of his reverie. He focused. Potter was not cheering with the others. His head was bowed and shadows obscured his face. Leaving Hogwarts looked like it might be painful for him too. Snape knew that the difficulty had nothing to do with him. Potter was saddened at the thought of leaving the castle, not Snape. The castle had been his true home and the place where he had matured to young manhood and now he was leaving it behind, discarded like an outgrown garment.
The sudden movement of several hundred students broke his concentration. Snape stood, the better to see Potter as he left the hall, but nothing of the kind happened. Standing motionless among the throng of milling students, his eyes downcast, Potter remained until the crush of holiday excited students finally thinned and at last, was gone.
Only then did he look up at Severus and at the first sight of his eyes, Snape’s heart leapt. For there he saw something that he had only ever dreamed he would see: desire. Potter’s eyes fairly glowed with it and it seemed their gaze would set Snape on fire such was the heated rush of blood he felt between his legs.
For an eternity it seemed they stood thus, staring into one another’s eyes until Potter broke the spell. He moved closer and closer to Severus with every soft step until he stood toe to toe with the man. A pale, soft hand reached up to touch a fingertip to Severus’ lips, green eyes focused there as if seeing these things for the first time.
“I … I can’t stay,” said Harry, his voice a whisper. “You know I can’t stay.”
The hand dropped to his side and then there it was only his eyes, shining with feeling gazing into Severus’ taking his breath away.
“Yes, I know,” he responded, his voice husky with desire, his hand sliding up Harry’s back to cradle the back of his head. “You are here now, though.”
As Severus’ lips touched his, and he gave himself up to the kiss, Harry thought, “Yes, I am here now.”
They left hand in hand.