“Yes, I agree with what you have said. The only problem, is that I have allowed that fear to colour my life for far too long, that I may have missed part of my life as I was too scared to open myself” she felt embarrassed to admit such an un-Gryffindor like quality to someone she felt so desperate to impress. She bit her lip for a moment, while she debated whether she should continue.
“I think some of mine comes down to embarrassment. I mean, I have always prided myself with being a decent judge of character, but with him I just did not see it” Demelza broke her eye contact with Justin, instead looking down at his chest as she drew a lazy finger across it. “Jamie was a struggling musician when I first met him one night in the pub, and we hit it off straight away. He was a few years older than me, the perfect combination of charming and cheeky struggling musician, who saw me as more then just the bookish school girl I was then.” She paused to suck in a breath, as she debated how much detail to go into. “Fast forward a couple of years, and the next thing we knew he had landed a contract following the Weird Sisters on their tour as a backing musician. It was a massive break for him, so I encouraged him to go, as I knew it would be an amazing opportunity. The only thing is that it meant he had to give up his flat for a while, so I offered to hold his things at mine while he was away” She gulped hard, knowing that the hardest part of the story was yet to come. “When he came back, he moved in with me. It was good, I mean really good for quite a while, and at the height of it all he proposed” She paused yet again, and a sigh escaped her lips, as the all too familiar part of the story arrived. “Fast forward six months though, its Valentine’s day and I am due to work. I guess my Healer-in-Charge that day felt sympathy for me, and gave me an early release from my shift so I could at least get dinner with Jamie. When I get home though, I found him in my bed with a groupie and guess as they say, the rest is history” Demelza felt it hard to look Justin in the face after admitting something so painful. She had left out a lot of the detail about the arguments, and the paranoia she had experienced when she suspected something was happening, but that was part of the story for another day.
“I have no doubt at all of either” she couldn’t help but laugh at his statement. It was such a refreshing change for Demelza to be with someone so passionate and driven. He ex Jamie had always been so happy to just wander aimlessly through life, just hoping for things to come his way. Justin on the other hand was constantly so determined, she doubted whether there was anything he couldn’t achieve if he wanted to. “I cannot wait to finally make it to a shack. The thought of sleeping in a queen sized anything, even if it is still a cot, is enough to make me want to try and simultaneously deal with all of my baggage at once”