James Sirius (jamminjamie) wrote in platform_zero, @ 2017-07-23 10:34:00 |
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Entry tags: | james sirius potter |
Who: Jamie Potter
What: Resolving Baggage
Where: Flying High
When: Sunday Morning
He had decided he was going to do this weeks ago. He had been resolved, determined, whatever. He was going to do it and get his bloody shack for him and Mary, and it would be great. Xander showing up had distracted him a bit, and he was able to just feel better about his future child. About his future in general, really. He had taken a couple days after Xander left to ... not mourn, but something close. He loved his son, even if he still didn't feel quite ready, and he couldn't fathom locking himself in a dark room while being so upset.
Now, though, he had shown up at the store early, and he was just staring at the door. He could do it. He'd eased himself into it, and he thought he was ready. After locking himself in with his grandad, and then Mary sitting outside the rooms he had locked himself in, he thought that he could do it by himself. Nothing bad had happened those times, he'd been in this storeroom a dozen times already and he knew everything that should be there. It would be fine.
Jamie took a deep breath and went in, closing the door behind him without hesitation. He closed his eyes and sunk down to the floor. Slowly, his eyes opened, though the room remained dark. His heart was pounding in this chest still, but he focused on his breath. It was fine, this was fine. Just a room that happened to be so dark he couldn't see. It was fine. Just in and out. In and out.
He didn't know how long it took, but his mind started drifting. He didn't need to concentrate on his breathing anymore in order to keep it steady, and his mind turned to Mary and the baby. It was natural, after all. He was doing it for them. He could just imagine Mary's face when he told her he'd gone into a dark space alone. He could picture helping his kid through whatever fear they eventually developed. A small smile pulled at his lips as he started imagining this future on the island, one where he didn't go into a panic attack at being in the dark.