A gift for crawfordslover!
Title: Only Words Author: TBA Giftee: crawfordslover Pairings: Percy/Oliver, Percy/Penelope friendship Rating: PG Word Count: ~1800 Warnings: None Disclaimer: None of this belons to me. It's all JKR's. Summary: "Dear Percy..." Thanks: To my lovely betas, who are absolute stars and without whom this fic would not exist. ♥
2 April
Dear Miss Penelope Clearwater and Guest,
The Minister of Magic cordially invites you to the Celebration Ball, to be held at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry on the fifteenth day of September.
As an honoured member of the Order of the Phoenix and survivor of the Battle of Hogwarts, your presence is requested at six in the evening for a more informal gathering, to be held in the Room of Requirement prior to the advent of the Ball itself.
Dress is formal, though both wizarding and Muggle attire is encouraged.
The favour of your reply is requested by 1 June.
Sincerely,
Percy Ignatius Weasley
Undersecretary to the Minister of Magic
Order of Merlin, Second Class
“Hello, Percy.”
“Penelope.”
“…Well. This a bit awkward, isn’t it?”
“I beg your pardon?”
“Come on Percy. Wasn’t more than five years ago you kissed me in the hallway. Before you decided you liked blokes, that is.”
“Well, really.”
“Oh, Percy. Don’t take that tone with me. It’s plain as day for anyone to see, particularly for someone who knows you so well, or rather, someone who once did. Besides I do so like the idea of having turned someone gay. So long as it doesn’t happen again, you understand. That might start giving me a complex.”
“I— ”
“Oh, lovely, there’s Oliver Wood! I must go say hello. Save a dance for me, won’t you Percy? And drink some more brandy, love, you’re looking a bit pale ’round the mouth there.”
1 October
Dear Percy,
Saw you at the terminal this morning. Was there myself with Peony’s eldest daughter Daisy (do remind me never to name my children—should they one day exist—after flowers, will you please? That’s one tradition that should not be shared among sisters. God forbid Peony’s next daughter be christened Gerbera or similar, to match her sister.)
You were looking very officious in your Ministry robes, even though I’m sure you were quite bored with baby-sitting duty. Hopefully none of the little brats—oh, excuse me, I mean the next generation of wizardkind—were overly troublesome. New programme of the Ministry’s seems to be reassuring to the parents though, so I suppose that’s what truly matters.
Let’s go out for a cuppa, shall we? You free around 1530?
Penelope
“Hullo, Percy.”
“Penelope! Actually, I’m quite busy this afternoon. I apologize for the absence of a reply, but your note just arrived a minute ago and I simply hadn’t had a chance to send my regrets.”
“I know that, darling. It’s why I’ve left it so late. Even undersecretaries must take breaks, after all.”
“Well, really, I simply don’t see how I could spare the time. My apologies.”
“Oh, come now, Percy. You and I both know you’d just like to avoid being anywhere in the vicinity of me until you’ve decided how you’re going to handle me knowing your little secret. We also both know that you don’t have another meeting today, so let’s just have a nice, friendly, cuppa, yeah?”
“Well, I suppose I could—”
“Fantastic. There’s this lovely little shop just down the road. Excellent scones, did you know?”
15 October
Dear Percy,
There’s a new art gallery opening in London this weekend, and the first exhibit is a reflection back on the Impressionistic period. I’d love to go, but don’t want to go alone. I remember you being particularly fond of the Impressionists, and I’ve got an extra ticket.
Would you care to join me?
Penelope
PS. As you can see, I still know you’re gay, and as I assured you in the tea shop (after what was, I must admit, a completely inept inquiry on your part) I still don’t mind. So let’s go and have a good time. Please?
“Percy, that was gorgeous! Thanks so much for coming with.”
“It was quite enjoyable, yes. Thank you for inviting me.”
“Of course. Just because we’re not dating anymore never meant we weren’t friends. After all, we liked something in each other well enough once, yeah?”
“I suppose that is true.”
“And then you decided you’d prefer to sleep with men.”
“Yes…I suppose that’s true too.”
“Well, good. That’s settled. How’d you like to go to a Quidditch match with me?”
“Quidditch? Really, I—”
“Oh, Percy. You like Quidditch as much as the next excitable Gryffindor. You just don’t like to admit it, especially around your brothers. And you hide it better. But I’ve got a connection to some incredible tickets. And there will be a fantastic view.”
“Well, perhaps I—.”
“Wonderful!”
12 November
Dear Percy,
Fabulous news! Have got tickets for Cannons vs. Puddlemere next Saturday.
Pick me up around 8:00 and we can grab a cuppa before the game—there’s this lovely concessions witch who always has the best goodies.
Cheers, Penelope
“Oooh, look Percy, there’s our seats!”
“Really, Penelope, we have plenty of time. No need to rush.”
“Of course there is. It’s always so much fun to watch the spectators—sometimes even more than the players…See that woman over there? Gives Mrs. Longbottom competition in the ugliest hat contest, yeah?”
“Well, that hat really is quite…noticeable.”
“Oh, Percy. Just admit it’s the ugliest thing you’ve ever seen and be done with it.”
“I don’t know that I would—”
“Oh, and then there’s that unfortunate soul over there. Someone should’ve told her that bright orange is really not her colour—even if one is trying to support the Cannons.”
“I will admit that she could’ve taken a little more care with her choice.”
“Well, that’s something at least. Oooh, here’s our seats!”
“What? Oh, yes, I suppose. But I was referring to the players, darling.”
26 November
Perce,
Got an interesting bit of gossip this morning. I know, I know. You’re not one for gossip generally, as you’ve told me countless times. (By the by, still haven’t forgiven you for implying I was a flighty bint in front of that gorgeous man in the bar. Just because a woman READS Witch Weekly doesn’t mean she likes it broadcast to eligible bachelors, you know.) But at any rate, this bit includes your favourite Keeper and I think you might be interested despite yourself.
Will have all the details for you this evening—don’t forget to be there a bit early. May need help fending off Grabby Gary (whose name is actually Chad, but I couldn’t come up with any clever alliteration for him that correctly implies my level of loathing).
Penny
“Penny, you look lovely.”
“Why, thank you Percy. You look quite fetching yourself. New robes?”
“Erm, yes, actually. Just came from Malkin’s this morning.”
“Well, they’re certainly gorgeous. And that colour suits you quite well. Tones your hair down just a bit too, which I know was probably the point in selecting that shade. Your hair’s gorgeous any time, darling, but I will admit you made a fantastic choice. No, don’t fidget. You’ll ruin the line. And you’ll want to look your best tonight, I’m sure.”
“Oh?”
“Yes, a certain Keeper just might be here as a guest of the Minister, you know.”
“I fail to see how that has anything to do with it.”
“Oh, Percy. You’ve been arse over tit for Oliver Wood since Hogwarts. Don’t even try to deny it. And a little birdie even told me that the esteemed Mister Wood might just have been very intrigued by the grown-up version of Percy Weasley he met at last week’s match.”
“Well, I—”
“Oh, don’t look so surprised, Percy. Anyone could’ve seen it. Be a dear and get me a white wine, will you? And hurry back; Oliver will be here in just a few moments.”
“I thought you weren’t certain he was coming?”
“Oh, dear, did I say that? Apologies, darling. Shame on me for telling such a horrible fib. “Penelope, I—”
“Oooh, look! There he is! And just in time too. Percy, you’ve met Steven, haven’t you?”
“I do believe so.”
“Good evening, darling! Am so pleased you’ve made it. And Percy here’s just agreed to switch tickets with you, so we’ll be at the same table.”
“I have?”
“Of course, Percy! Oliver already has your ticket, don’t you recall? And he’s nearly here; can’t you see him in those lovely garnet robes of his? Stands out like a parrot in Britain, I should say. We’ll see you both after the dinner! Have a wonderful time!”
27 November
Dearest Percy,
Well, how did it go? Am dying to hear!!!!
Penny
27 November (again)
Perce,
Where are you? Perhaps you’re still sharing a bed with the esteemed Keeper Wood? (And oh Merlin, that sentence is just too funny right now.)
Can’t wait to hear!
Love, P.
27 November (AGAIN)
Percy Ignatius Weasley, you snap out of that strop right now, or I’m going to come over there. And don’t bother putting up wards—I was a Prefect too you know, and better at you in Charms besides.
“Percy? Get out here. I mean it. I’ve had it up to here with your inconsiderate prattishness. After all the trouble I went to, you decide a fitting repayment is to sulk in your flat all day and well into the night? Well, that’s enough, I’m coming in whether you—”
“Penelope?”
“Oliver.”
“Yes.”
“Oh, dear. I think I’ve made a bit of an arse of myself, really.”
“Just a tad.”
“Oh, shut up. And don’t think I’ve forgotten you owe me even more than Mr. Oblivious in there does. I certainly expect high tea next Sunday, as promised.”
“You’ll get it, don’t worry. Now if you wouldn’t mind…?”
“Mind what? OH! Of course not. I’ll just see myself out, shall I? Have a lovely evening.”
30 November
Dearest Percy,
Apologies for the previous letters. Clearly they were rude and in bad taste. But really, you could’ve let me know you were all right!
Well, never mind that. Free for tea this afternoon? I want to hear all about your lovely few days with the extremely edible Mr. Wood.
Penelope
1 December
Dearest Percy,
You really are an awful prude. Can’t see why you won’t share. I shared my exploits with Steven, after all. (Come to think of it, that may have been what put you off. If so, apologies.)
But never mind. Oliver was a dear and filled me in. So much more forthcoming than you! (By the way, how come you never did that tongue trick when we were dating? Would’ve loved to experience it, I’m sure. I suppose it’s not too late—Oliver won’t mind.) Can’t wait for tea this Saturday; have had Oliver change the reservation to three, and we can all go together. Won’t that be fun?!