|sugar_cycle (sugar_cycle) wrote in paxletalelogs,|
@ 2011-01-26 03:33:00
|Entry tags:||changing woman, tiamat|
Day Late, Dollar Short
Who: Karin, Kami
What: Kami finally gives up on the OTC tests, sucks it up, and goes to the doctor. Poor Karin. That is not how she should meet her fellow residents.
Where: The sanitary sanctuary of the hospital.
When: January 18th
Warnings: None yet!
Relax, Kami told herself firmly as she walked down the brightly lit hospital hall towards the exit. The scent of sanitizing cleaning solutions was sharp in her nose and the glare off the gleaming tiles hurt her eyes. Ducking her head, she wrapped her arms more tightly around her torso and she felt her purse swing to bump her hip at the motion. Relax, she repeated. You're not pregnant. There's no bun in the oven. You aren't going to have to have any more awkward conversations or, God, do paternity testing to see if it was going to be Papa Shae or Daddy Jack.
Somehow, though, the knowledge of a bullet dodged did not unravel the knot deep in her stomach. She still felt sick, shakey and weak. Not herself at all.
Maybe it was the other things the doctor had to say. Kami swallowed hard. She could not cry in public. She would not cry in public. No matter what.
She was not pregnant, yes, but there was something else wrong inside. No period since October, the look on the doctor's face as discussed possible situations with her... But there was no pain and, though he made an appointment for some additional tests and x-rays, she knew he was doing it only because his professional pride was at risk. After all, what doctor would want to admit to the first words that had left his mouth as the examination progressed?
Kami shuddered and bit down hard on her lower lip. She had to get out of the hospital and get home. She needed to text the boys and... She didn't know what came after "and then." She was afraid to think about what came after that. Picking up her pace and keeping her eyes low, she rounded the corner and made for the wide double doors, beyond which lay the comfort of her car and the safety of her little apartment.