|It's Brittany, Bitch | Ερις (eristic) wrote in paxletalelogs,|
@ 2017-03-06 12:57:00
|Entry tags:||eris, hermes|
wham, bam, thank you ma'am
Who: BB & Percy.
What: Two Greek deities come to a truce over comic books.
Where: The Secret Headquarters.
When: Feb. 28
BB couldn't be bothered to answer questions like, Superman vs. Thor? Batman vs. Iron Man? DC vs. Marvel? She thought the Marvel movies were better, but Gal Gadot was a fiiiine Super Woman, and she did like the X-men. Why did there have to be so many sides? She honestly couldn't have given less of a fuck, and anyone who asked her to answer even the more minute nerd question was more than likely to get a roll of her eyes than an answer.
Still, The Secret Headquarters had become one of the...well, admittedly, many places she stopped at for leisure. Mostly she liked browsing through the different artwork, didn't understand why people would shell out money for issues and wait such a long time between installations. The waiting killed her. Instead, she bought volumes or anything more complete, things where she didn't have to wait too long for the story.
She was there one afternoon between assignments, blowing off steam following a poorly done article that had gotten few clicks; to be fair, how was she supposed to know Kim Kardashian would post another nude selfie and steal the limelight? She wasn't psychic, and by now this had to be like the woman's fifteenth nude selfie. Instead, BB buried her sorrows in an older copy of Uncanny X-men, ignoring all and sundry around her.
BB chose not to notice whoever was trying to talk to her. She was reading about goddamn Storm and Kitty Pryde.
BB turned her back toward the source of the voice.
"HEY, CHICK WEARING THE PURPLE SKIRT. 30 SECOND TIME LIMIT."
BB thrust down the comic, glaring daggers in the direction of the portly salesman seated behind the cash register. He merely glared back, inserting another french fry into his mouth. BB eventually backed off of the staring contest, putting the comic back on its shelf and moving down, around an endcap as though impeded vision might allow her some peace.
"I CAN STILL SEE YOU, MISS."
BB huffed, throwing the issue she'd been holding down onto the wrong stack. She moved off to the other side of the store, looking for an escape and completely missing the curly-headed gentleman watching the whole exchange.
Brittany. BB. Whatever she was calling herself today didn’t matter to Percy. What did matter was the amusement Percy felt at BB clearly going against the heavily stated rules of The Secret Headquarters. He was even willing to mostly overlook the oddness of running into her a second time; it seemed as if again, he’d beaten her to the punch...albeit a leisurely visit to browse comics was less time sensitive than finishing an article for work.
Putting back the Scooby Doo issue he’d been flipping through prior to BB upsetting the cashier, Percy sauntered over to the stack of comics where BB had unceremoniously thrown an unwanted selection. He picked it up, flipped through it aimlessly, and then cleared his throat.
“Excuse me, Miss. I think you dropped this.” Percy held the comic up, waving it slightly in the air. A shit-eating grin dominated his features as he waited for the small firecracker of a woman to respond.
He did not wait long. BB turned to glare daggers at this new annoyance, then huffed as she realized who it was. Rather than simply walk off and ignore him, however, as any sane person might, she turned in his direction but was waylaid by the salesperson.
"You too, curly top. 30 second limit, you need to buy if you wanna read. This ain't a library."
BB rolled her eyes, holding her hand out for the comic book. "So first my routes, then my apartment, and now my comic book store? Where do you get off?!"
“Oh, I’m just browsing, sir,” Percy said casually, the store employee responding with an irritated huff of indignation. He dutifully handed the comic back to BB, as if that had been his plan all along--and perhaps it had been.
“Here you go.” He was nonplussed by BB’s aggravation, having already traveled down this road with her once before. Her attitude was, he thought coyly, a little like steam escaping from a hot kettle: loud, a bit annoying, but altogether harmless. Worse eggs existed than BB, the unfortunate recipient of fate’s cruel joke--occasional, completely pseudo asthmatic symptoms.
“It’s nice to see you, too, by the way. Here is better than on my routes, at any rate.” Percy lightly crossed his arms over his chest, smiling at his errant acquaintance. “There’s nothing secret about this place, so I almost didn’t make the trip. But then I found out the new Future Quest issue was in stock; what’re you here to pick up?”
She shrugged. "Nothing in particular. Some more X-men, if Barry over here would let me look." Her voice rose in an accusatory tone, eyes sliding back in the salesperson's direction.
"If you paid for it, you could look all you wanted," he responded without even glancing from the screen he was staring at. BB huffed again, then turned back to Percy.
"And no, of course it's not actually secret. How else would they get any business? Are you just stalking me?" She could well remember Aurora's special attention for the man while they were leaving the Valentine's Day event at CASKET, and the memory made her feel less than sympathetic toward him now. With the issue still in hand, she crossed her arms over her chest and arched a brow in Percy's direction.
“Well, they’d hire a few more men like Barry over there,” Percy offered, smiling mostly to himself. This was nothing more than a friendly little meet and greet, and it certainly made picking up Future Quest #8 a more exciting endeavor--he was slightly behind on the series, admittedly. Percy fixed BB with a look of befuddled confusion.
“Why would I stalk you? The only person here that’s a stalker is Barry. Has he ever stopped watching you since you walked into this place?” Granted, with a quick look over his shoulder, it was clear to Percy that Barry was far more interested in browsing the screen of his computer than keeping track of his customers. It was almost as if the man purposely waited to hear the sound of comic book pages turning before he would attempt to interact with a patron.
BB cast a glance over her shoulder in the direction of the cashier, her eyes narrowing. He hadn't, but then again, Barry was like that with all the customers. For once, she wasn't being especially watched because of her attitude or some other reason, whatever Percy might be implying.
"He's just a dick. Something you're well acquainted with, huh?" She replied as she turned back to Percy, a smirk stretching out her mouth.
"Hey, YOU TWO. Move it or lose it! If you're not buying, you're wasting my time," Barry called out, at least having the courtesy to swallow down more of his snack before speaking. BB didn't even look back at him this time, rolling her eyes toward the ceiling.
"I swear to god, this place was so much better before they hired that asswipe."
Percy meant to respond to BB’s unappetizing assessment of himself--for he certainly didn’t care to be defamed. However, their charming friend Barry felt like intruding, as if he truly had nothing else to do with his time; sweeping the floor, cleaning the windows, straightening up the comic stacks: any of these options would have better benefited the untoward employee. Percy was not, all things considered, a particularly angry man. When it came to difficult situations, he much more preferred to let the pieces fall where they may, and walk away--preferably--unscathed.
But Barry was annoying.
“He’s just doing his job,” Percy said quietly, the message intended for BB’s ears only. “...Terribly.” His eyes scanned the rows of comics, spotting the ‘F’ section. Was catching up on Future Quest really worth the verbal assault? “It’s a good thing I’m only spending a few minutes here,” he added, speaking louder for Barry’s hearing pleasure. “Otherwise, I might feel unwelcome.”
"Not my problem," was the salesperson's reply, one that inevitably pulled a smirk on BB's lips.
"If you're trying to get on his good side, don't bother. He doesn't have one." She turned, inserting the issue she'd been holding into a nearby stack that was nothing close to what the issue was about. Between her own love of disorder and her distaste for the comic book store's employee, she couldn't have cared less that she was messing up his inventory. Her eyes met Percy's with a new interest. "So seriously, you're into comic books? Marvel or DC?"
“Yeah, I can tell,” Percy muttered, watching as BB sought to overthrow Barry’s entire life by once again haphazardly placing her comic where it didn’t belong. For his part, Percy felt it could very well stay there; Barry didn’t exactly invite random acts of kindness to happen at his job position.
“Occasionally.” His initially casual reply to BB’s question belaid the interest he felt in discussing such an enjoyable hobby. “I mostly read the titles DC’s putting out as a homage to the old Hanna-Barbera cartoons. That’s why I’m here. Moving stole the precious time I was devoting to Future Quest; I’m behind one or two issues.” Percy studied BB for a moment; she’d tossed aside an X-Men comic, one of many in what he thought of as a never-ending convoluted series. Still, the movies were entertaining enough. “I take it you’re a Marvel fan. Are you also a big fan of the hairy clawed guy?”
BB's shoulders rose and fell in both an acquiescence and a "not really" in reply to his question. "I just read what interests me. Wolverine's allright, but I like Kitty and Psylocke better. Wonder Woman's cool too, and then there's some less mainstream stuff I'm into. Have you heard of WicDiv?"
"Let's keep it moving before I call security," Barry called over, picking up the phone to wave in their direction. BB let out something very much akin to a growl. After a beat, she grabbed Percy's arm and bodily pulled him in the direction of the aisle where she'd been directly in Barry's line of sight. Having purposefully placed her witness, she grabbed the latest volume of her previously described comic, and started describing it to Percy in a loud voice. "It's about these people who wake up as deities, and they, like, become rock stars. It's kind of crazy, but the art is fucking amazing."
"OK, seriously," Barry interjected, finally climbing down from his stool to walk toward them. "This is the last warning you're getting from me. You two need to vacate the premises and stop loitering if you're not going to buy anything." He came within three feet of BB, which was clearly what she wanted. One hand reached out to grab the comic book from her, and she took it as an opportunity to strike. One hand around his arm twisted it behind his back, followed by a sweeping kick that knocked his feet out from under him. One moment, Barry was standing on two legs, the next, he was on the floor on his back, staring wide-eyed up toward the ceiling.
"My friend and I are gonna browse, OK?"
Barry nodded mutely, that blank gaze slowly moving from the ceiling to BB's face, which was now hovering over his. "Of...of course."
"And you're gonna just let us fucking be, right?"
The same nod met her question, and BB smiled like a cat with cream. She glanced at Percy.
"Anything you wanna ask about? I bet Barry here would be more than happy to help you find your Hannah Banana or whatever."
Percy started to answer BB when Barry swiftly intervened--his attitude towards customers was likely the most vigorous portion of Barry’s day. The man’s threat seemed hollow, however, and Percy chose to ignore it. However, BB clearly did not take lightly to the threat of potential security officers on speed dial, and she yanked Percy along with her.
Yanked, of course, being far too strong of a word. Instead, Percy allowed himself to be pulled along, unable to ignore the curiosity he felt towards BB’s obvious intentions. The comic she wanted to show him, despite the ridiculous plot, came second in his mental list of interesting things on the daily menu.
“Why would fire and brimstone gods waste their time being rock stars,” Percy started to ask, when Barry appeared on the scene, having bothered to actually posit himself as a meager threat to their status as Secret Headquarters Patrons. The next series of events happened almost faster than Percy could follow--Barry, the instigator of all things annoying, was manhandled by BB in such a manner that he could no longer bend gravity to his will.
It was, admittedly, an impressive display of David versus Goliath, and one which Percy had not seen often in his life. He exchanged a look with BB, one which indicated not only his state of open astonishment, but also a level of respect that had previously not existed for his...what had she called him? Oh, yes. Friend.
“I already know what I’m looking for here, BB, and where to find it, but thank you.” His grin was impish as he purposely stepped over Barry’s limp body, in order to finish his route to the F section of the store. But first Percy stopped to peer down at Barry.
“Excuse me, sir. Do you know anything about rock star gods? I’m interested in them after all.”
Barry nodded, waiting a moment for BB to step back so he could at least rise to a sitting position. The smallish woman lingered nearby, clearly ready to pounce again if he said or did the wrong thing.
"Uh, yeah. It's...it's over here..." He started toward one of the store's front displays, where new volumes and issues were the first thing offered to customers as they walked in. BB shot a grin at Percy, her earlier problems with him regarding Aurora and his encroachment on her things seemingly forgiven in the wake of her small victory.
“Thanks, Barry. You’re a true pal.” Percy pivoted to follow the kowtowed Barry, but not before stopping to say a few last words to BB. He was, perhaps, more friendly than he’d been during their first encounter--not that he hadn’t been adequately cordial the other week, given the circumstances. “Hey, I’ll let you know what I think of the rock star gods. Maybe I’ll even let you borrow my Future Quest issues at some point. I’ll see you around, BB.”
BB offered him a friendlier smile than she had previously; literally knocking the comic book store salesman down a peg left her in a much better mood.
"Sounds good, Percy. I'm sure we'll run into each other again." She watched for a moment as Barry helped Percy find the things he was searching for, and then returned to her X-men comics, blissfully browsing in peace.