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nishka//loki (nishka) wrote in paxletalelogs,

She smiled wryly at the suggestions, idly thinking about what the chances were that she could lure him over for Monday night and keep him for breakfast. She didn’t want to seem clingy though, or interfere in his work. She didn’t want to know the details of how he prepared for his…clients. Don’t ask, don’t tell.

“It’s not that simple,” she said, but didn’t elaborate. Jay caught her attention though with her barrage of questions, echoing what she had been asking herself all afternoon. And try as she might, for every one of those four questions, all she came back with was one answer.

“Yes,” she said simply, as if that answered everything asked. And, she supposed it did. She drained the rest of her glass and indicated to her that she’d have another.

“I swore I’d never do this again,” she said with a sigh, “but I’m right back in it. It’s like there’s two different…’me’s duking it out in my head, and I don’t know which to root for.” She’d never spoken to anyone about this, about the voice that badgered her, getting stronger by the day, arguing with her and second guessing her decisions. Right now she could feel it there in the back of her mind, but it was quiet and watchful, wanting to see where she was going with this.