Heather.
No, it's not. I never would have killed him before, Heather! I wouldn't have gone back and -- it's not the same. I've killed things. Plenty of things. And I should have put more thought into it. I mean, I got pissed that I couldn't save Dean and I went off and shot a possessed person when they were going to revert back to their normal self right after I left anyway. That's three bodies. Three lives. Maybe Jake doesn't count since he wasn't human, he was like me, but everyone else...