Fred.
I like that - what you said about love. It sounds right. You are very articulate and eloquent. I've used up my eloquence just using that word :P
Professional rambler? You put that on your resume? I might!
It was almost worse when we realized we couldn't be together at all. Like wanting to have an apple and having the option of any other fruit, BUT apples. And, knowing that you really love the taste of apples more than anything else.
Faith had mentioned something about, even when we're pulled out of our lives, another version of us stays. I dunno how it works. She said that the future me was out there, in Scotland. Do you think maybe you're still back in the other L.A.? Maybe it's not better to think of you being happy with Wes, when you don't get to experience it firsthand...
Wes is probably okay though, I mean, he's survived through a ton. And if you're not there, he's probably waiting for you all patient-like. Like you're off at war and he has to stay at home and sew quilts until you get back (while his love for you grows and he swoons and pines). Or possibly that's the plot of some movie I saw. He probably isn't sewing, maybe playing chess?
Running away was ultimately immature of me...I hurt a lot of people in the process (myself included) - especially my Mom. I wouldn't recommend it.
Oh, I doubt I'll have any love problems here. One ex boyfriend is dead, the other isn't here (but I've told he got married, anyway). And yea, that's about it. I'll be living vicariously through others. All I get is weird Spike, being nice to me while I tell myself it wouldn't be nice to punch him through a wall.