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Finnick Odair | The Hunger Games ([info]dist4_finnick) wrote in [info]paradisolog,
@ 2016-06-23 17:17:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:~bucky barnes (onearmedbandit), ~finnick odair (dist4_finnick)

WHO: Finnick Odair and OTA (multiples OK)
WHAT: Going out on the Maggie
WHEN: Late Thursday afternoon
WHERE: The beach
WARNINGS: Not likely, will edit if necessary
STATUS: Open, Complete



With all the building and everything lately, Finnick hadn't taken Maggie out in a while. Well, he decided, it was time that came to an end. He was going fishing for dinner, and taking the canoe out would allow him access to better fishing areas than just standing on shore. He brought some hooks, a net and a spear and headed down to the beach. He found the canoe where he had left it, a bit south of the path up to camp, just inside the treeline. He had pulled it up from the shore to where the jungle began in order to protect it in case a storm came. That wouldn't protect it if there were something serious like a hurricane, but then nothing would. So far they hadn't had any storms like that. In fact, except for that one week, it hadn't rained at all. It was rather shocking that the plants were so green and the streams still flowed when it seemed like they should be in the midst of a drought, but that was just part of the magic of the island, he supposed.

The Maggie was a simple dugout canoe, about twenty feet long. Someday he intended to add an outrigger and maybe a sail, but he hadn't had time to do so yet. It had taken him weeks just to cut down a large enough tree and hollow it out. He hadn't had anything but the little hatchet he'd arrived with when he started. Later he'd gotten a tool kit, and eventually they had gotten power tools for the main camp, but most of the work had been done by hand. It had been his longest project and biggest achievement on the island, at least until he'd started building the house.

There was something about being on the water that always made him feel better. He took off his shirt and left it handing on a tree branch so that it would stay clean and dry. Then he pulled the boat down from the treeline to the surf and prepared to push it out into the waves and jump in.


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Bucky & Finnick
[info]onearmedbandit
2016-06-24 10:23 pm UTC (link)
Bucky had been coming down to the beach area to go for a swim. His shoulder was still bothering him but he hadn't wanted to tell anyone that but Steve. Maybe letting it 'soak' a bit in the salt water would help. His mind was on that so it took him a moment to notice Finnick.

Smiling widely, he walked over to him. He could help Finnick with the boat and chat. While that wouldn't help his shoulder, it'd be good for the rest of him. He'd wanted an opportunity to talk to Finnick alone and a boat seemed like the perfect opportunity.

"Hey," he called when he was close and waved. "Do you want a hand with that?" Smiling he came up to Finnick.

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]dist4_finnick
2016-06-25 09:22 am UTC (link)
Finnick was slowly dragging the boat down the sand towards the water. It was too long and heavy for him to lift it on his own, so dragging was the only option. It was slow going and he was a little out of breath.

He looked up and then smiled when he saw Bucky approaching. He waved back and answered. "Sure, I could use a hand getting it down to the water. Then I was going to take her out fishing. You ever fished from a canoe before?" He considered asking Bucky to come fishing with him, but he was somewhat cautious. A novice could capsize a canoe if they weren't careful, and he'd already had that happen once with Chloe and didn't want it to happen again. Although to be fair, that hadn't really be due to her inexperience on boats so much as them attempting certain activities the gods never intended to take place on a canoe.

"So what have you been up to lately?" He asked.

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]onearmedbandit
2016-06-25 10:01 am UTC (link)
Bucky came around to the other end of the canoe. "Sure, I can help you with this. Are we picking it up and carrying it?" He could do that, it looked heavy but not too bad. It'd probably not help his shoulder but that was fine. Finnick was a good friend, he was happy to help.

"I have never fished from a canoe but I'd like to learn." He smiled at Finnick. Bucky didn't get sea sick and had excellent balance. He was certain he could handle being in the canoe. It'd be a fun new experience. "Actually that's something I wanted to talk to you about. But I'd rather talk about it on the water." Nobody else needed to know. Bucky was definitely hoping to keep things under wraps.

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]dist4_finnick
2016-06-25 10:33 am UTC (link)
"I was dragging, but now that you're here we should be able to lift it with one of us at each end." He and Derek had carried it down to the beach from where he'd done most of the work, high in the jungle, so he knew it was possible for two men to lift it. Well, a man and a werewolf, at least. But it should still be possible.

"Sure, why don't you come fish with me then. Just be careful once we're in the canoe, because it's not that stable side to side and it's possible to capsize it with sudden movements."

He lifted his end of the canoe, and then set it down once they reached the surf. "So here's how this is going to work. You get in front, then I'll push us out and jump in the back. The guy who's steering always sits in the back on a canoe. Your job is to just sit fairly still and not make any sudden movements until we get out past the breakers. I'll do the paddling. Once we get out past the breakers we can talk and fish."

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]onearmedbandit
2016-06-25 10:47 am UTC (link)
"Ah. Let me take my shoes off." Bucky quickly took them off and left them at the treeline where he saw Finnick's shirt in the tree. Then he jogged back ready to pick up the other end. He was in his shorts and his long sleeve shirt unbuttoned nothing underneath. This was too public to consider taking his shirt off so he left it on.

"Okay, I'll grab this end, and then when we get to the surf I'll get in and be very still so you can get us going. If you want me to help paddle I can do that too or whatever is easiest for you." Smiling at Finnick Bucky moved to do exactly as Finnick instructed him.

Getting in the boat was not hard, and he sat unnaturally still, balanced in his position. He could be still in a way few others could if required and while this wasn't a situation that required that, he still held himself carefully all the same.

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]dist4_finnick
2016-06-25 09:07 pm UTC (link)
Finnick waiting for him to return, then picked up his end of the boat and carried it down to the surf. "I'll paddle at least until we get out past the breakers, then we'll see. Have you ever paddled a canoe before?"

When he started pushing it out and Bucky got in, Finnick was surprised by just how still he was. He certainly could follow directions much better than Chloe. Not that Chloe had done badly, it was just that Bucky was much better than he would expect a novice to be.

Finnick quickly paddled them out past the breakers just to the edge of a sandbar that he'd found to be a good fishing spot. "We can stay here for a while, if you want to talk. This should be far enough out."

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]onearmedbandit
2016-06-25 09:14 pm UTC (link)
"I've never paddled a canoe but I've paddled a boat before." Bucky didn't mind not participating, he wanted to help if Finnick wanted it. Honestly, it'd be easier on him physically not to paddle and let his shoulder have a rest.

"I did want to talk. Thanks for letting me come with you. I didn't know you'd had a boat, it's really nice." Bucky continued being very still as he'd been instructed to be. "I've not had much opportunity to be out on the ocean like this. Not in a small boat where you can feel the motion of the water so much. It's peaceful. In the war, I was on boats going across the ocean to England and all, but that was a huge ship."

Bucky looked Finnick over a bit. "How have you been doing? I've not seen you around much. Everything okay?"

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]dist4_finnick
2016-06-25 10:39 pm UTC (link)
"A canoe is a little different. It's probably easier if I handle it." He'd be willing to teach Bucky if he really wanted to know, but it was easier for him just to do it himself.

"I built the boat the first few weeks we were here. It was a personal labor of love for me. I worked on it during my downtime when I wasn't working on the medical center, or fishing. I grew up on boats and I missed being on the water. Of course I'd rather have something bigger and more suited to the open ocean, but this will have to do for now."

Finnick put the paddle down in the bottom of the boat once they reached his fishing spot. "I'm fine." He said, "Busy and a little freaked out about the baby, but everything's good. How about you? You been keeping busy?"

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]onearmedbandit
2016-06-26 12:47 pm UTC (link)
Bucky nodded, fine with Finnick handling things. He couldn't mess it up and flip it or whatever Finnick was worried about happening with the boat. He'd continue to sit very still then.

"It's a very nice boat. It's impressive that you could build this yourself. You really do have a lot to offer the people here." He smiled at Finnick. "I'm sure you can work out how to build a bigger one if you need to later." Maybe Bucky and Steve could build a boat too. That might be a fun project after more of the work on the island is completed.

He wasn't sure how to say this or what he wanted to say exactly. However, this was Finnick and Bucky trusted him a lot. More than anyone else on the island beside Steve. So he went with blurting it out. "Steve and I had sex. A lot. I don't really know what that means or where that leaves us and I'm a bit well, freaked out about it."

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]dist4_finnick
2016-06-26 05:15 pm UTC (link)
"You don't have to stay that still." Finnick said with a smile. "It's alright to move a little, just no sudden lateral movements."

"Oh, she's not much. A stone-age type of boat, made with mostly stone age type tools, but she was the best I could do at the time. I can improve her someday, when I have more time. For now we don't really need boats, so she's just a luxury."

Finnick could tell that Bucky had something difficult and important to say, so he sat back and waited for him to say it.

"Oh...well...that's a good thing, right?" Finnick had frankly wondered about the two of them since day one. Bucky had seemed so protective and almost possessive of Steve, and had denied any hint of them being a couple so vehemently that there almost had to be something to it, at least on his side.

"You've liked him for a long time, haven't you?" he asked gently.

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]onearmedbandit
2016-06-26 06:59 pm UTC (link)
Bucky shrugged his right shoulder. "I was a sniper. I'm used to be still for long periods of time. This is a lot more comfortable than most of the places I've done so."

"Even if you say so, she's still wonderful and a bit of freedom and privacy in a place where both are short supply. I can see why you enjoy having her." He remembered Finnick telling him how he grew up in a place that was known for it's fishing and growing up on boats. He could see how Finnick would need this connection to that. A way to keep himself grounded in some ways.

"I think so. I'm just...really afraid of what will happen. Of what will happen when Steve comes to his senses that being with me is a bad bed. He could do so much better. I'm worried how he'll react if people figure it out and say something about us to us. Tell him that he shouldn't be with me or call him names." Bucky looked out over the water a moment, trying to reign in all of his running thoughts. "I don't know a lot of stuff about the whole thing. He was the one who didn't want to do this, before, in Brooklyn, so I keep waiting for him to tell me he's sorry but he changed his mind."

He looked back at Finnick. "Or worse, to realize he's doing this out of pity because he feels guilty that I fell and got captured and nobody looked for me. I have liked him a long time. I was in love with him when we were kids, but I never said nothing. You couldn't then." This was more than he'd probably ever told anyone about the whole situation and it felt good to say. He'd told Jack bits and pieces but here getting the whole story out felt a bit cathartic.

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]dist4_finnick
2016-06-26 07:50 pm UTC (link)
"Why would anyone say anything like that?" No one here ever made fun of people over who they slept with, as far as he knew. "I don't think anyone would say anything like that. I, for one, am happy for you, and I think most people would be."

Finnick shook his head. "Yeah, Steve is a good looking guy. Sure, he could probably get just about anyone he wanted. But you're pretty damn hot yourself. You guys are pretty well matched in that regard. Obviously I don't know Steve well enough to know what he's thinking or feeling, but you shouldn't feel unworthy of him. You're not. Don't sell yourself short."

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]onearmedbandit
2016-06-26 09:42 pm UTC (link)
Bucky wondered how to explain it and sat quietly thinking about it. Finally he thought he'd try with the truth. "Steve is a hero back home. Everyone loves him, he's got cartoons, comic books, movies, all kinds of stuff. He's like the symbol of the country in some ways. I'm the opposite. We were friends, best friends, and then I was captured during the war and everyone thought I died. Steve was thought killed too, but his plane was encased in ice in the ocean."

"While he was frozen there, I was turned into a weapon and used to kill, torture, and maim innocent people. I was a monster, a boogie man to other assassins. I didn't have my mind anymore, I wasn't me, but I'm still responsible. Eventually, all that was discovered, the group that held me was rooted out and I was on the run trying to regain my memories and wanting to be left alone. All the people who are here from our same reality know these things. They all like Steve and don't like me." With good reason. Bucky understood, he didn't like it but he understood.

"They'll give Steve hell over this. Shame him, treat him like shit, ask him why he's crazy. He'd not be able to be 'gay'or whatever he is, it's not like how I am at least. He is supposed to be with a good woman and have a passel of blond pretty children. Not shack up with his brain damaged assassin former friend and do filthy gay things with him." Bucky sighed. When he said it out loud it sounded even worse. Damn why would Steve even consider doing this with him to start with.

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]dist4_finnick
2016-06-27 07:35 pm UTC (link)
Finnick listened and nodded. "So he was a hero and you were a villain. But it wasn't your fault, and that was in the old world. None of that matters here. It complicates things that there are people from your old world here, and they knew you when you were forced to be a weapon, but they should realize that's all in the past now." He could understand how hard it could be to leave the past behind, but in his mind the whole point of this place was starting over.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa...who would say anything like that? About 'filthy gay things?' I truly don't think that anyone here thinks like that. Really. I think you're projecting attitudes from your own world onto them." Finnick hadn't heard anything like that about anyone, and gods knew he'd been with enough men and women here to hear just about everything. Everyone had their own preferences, but no one seemed to care and many people seemed to be enjoying the chance to be more adventurous than at home.

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]onearmedbandit
2016-06-27 10:04 pm UTC (link)
"I don't know if they do. I think if they knew how we were together, how I feel about him... then they'd say I was corrupting him or ruining him. Something awful." This was making Bucky feel worse instead of better. He rubbed at his face carefully, not wanting to rock the boat. "I don't know. I'm sorry. I shouldn't be telling you all of this." Finnick was having a hard time for real reasons, he didn't need to hear Bucky's drama.

"There aren't any other guys together here. Obviously people have some problem with it. I don't know, I think it makes it worse though. If I was a woman they'd probably be less awful about it."

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]dist4_finnick
2016-06-27 10:33 pm UTC (link)
"It's alright." He said calmingly. "You can tell me. Sometimes it's better to talk about things. Sometimes another perspective helps, or even just a ranting to blow off steam. It's fine." He didn't want Bucky to think he couldn't talk to him. He just wanted to help him see that he didn't need to fear other people's opinions so much.

"There aren't any other guys who are a couple, but there also aren't that many couples, period. Most people are still just sleeping around. I know for a fact that there are other guys who like guys here."

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]onearmedbandit
2016-06-27 11:00 pm UTC (link)
"Thank you for listening. You're a really good friend to me. I appreciate it." He gave Finnick a stressed smile. "I think I'm letting it psych me out because I'm worried about when the other shoe may drop. When I'll lose what I have here. Which is silly but I've lost so much, I think I'm conditioned to expect to lose anything else I want." Which at least it was an upgrade in having wants at all.

"It seems like there are a lot of couples here if you watch what people do in the evenings. A lot of people sleep with the same ones over and over. They may not be having kids but they are going to the same shelters."

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]dist4_finnick
2016-06-28 06:56 pm UTC (link)
"I'm happy to listen anytime." Well, that next part made sense to Finnick. The fear that something was too good so it would be taken away. He knew Chloe loved him, but he didn't always understand why and sometimes he worried she would come to her senses. Not often, but sometimes. "I get that. It's scary when you love something or someone so much. It's terrifying to think that it could be taken away. But I think we have a pretty good life here where that's not too likely to happen."

"Are there?" Finnick was surprised to here that there were lots of regular couples. He went through the ones he knew of in his mind. Him and Chloe, of course, Scott and Bri, and Stiles and Malia. Or at least he thought they were a couple now. That situation had always been complicated. Three wasn't that many, but maybe there were others he wasn't aware of. After all, he was pretty discreet about his own liaisons, and the flip side of that was that he generally ignored what other people were doing to give them privacy as well. "Huh, I didn't know that."

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]onearmedbandit
2016-06-28 10:13 pm UTC (link)
"You help keep me going." He smiled at Finnick more warmly this time. "I really do value your advice and friendship." Bucky looked out at the horizon for the rest, not sure how to reply exactly. "It is something I worry about. If Steve was taken away from me or something. I don't know what I'd do. I hope I don't have to find out."

"Yeah, more than you'd think. People tend to sleep with the same one or two people over and over. I guess coupling up is just natural." He shrugged. Looking at the water, Bucky saw a fish swim by in the shallows. "We should probably get to fishing if that's the plan?"

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Bucky & Finnick
[info]dist4_finnick
2016-06-29 06:53 pm UTC (link)
"Yeah, I hope so too. I think it's safe, though. I think it's safe to want things. It's not like everything's perfect, but it's better than home."

He looked down and saw the fish. "You're right, looks like the fish are ready so we'd better get to fishing."


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