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Tweak says, "I'm sorry, Chocolates!"

Malia Tate | Teen Wolf (wantsherfurcoat) wrote in paradisolog,
@ 2016-05-08 21:55:00

Entry tags:

~malia tate (wantsherfurcoat), ~stiles stilinski (devoided)

WHO: Malia Tate and Stiles Stilinski
WHAT: Stargazing
WHEN: After the bonfire
WHERE: On the beach
WARNINGS: TBD
STATUS: Closed/Complete

Ever since the big exodus, Malia had felt on edge. It could have been that she was now carrying two babies (actually, she was pretty sure that was at least part of it), but it was also because she felt like she'd had something to do with everyone leaving. And she hated that. Apparently, she was a lot worse at this people thing than she'd thought she was...and she had never thought she was very good at it to start with.

If she hadn't recently gotten her memories of Stiles back, if she hadn't had those memories to reassure her that she could be loved, she probably would have been in much worse shape than she was now. As it was, she wished that Stiles could just remember too. But if he couldn't, she'd do her best to make him remember, to bring those feelings back to him. Because she knew - because they'd talked, and because they'd been close - that Stiles had felt alone for most of his life, too. And when they'd been together, they'd filled that hole in each other. They'd been weird. But they'd worked. And she wanted him back.

But she also loved him, and she wasn't going to push him, because she wanted him to get there on his own. She wanted him to love her, not just humor her. She wanted him to look at her like he had, because that was...well, it had been perfect to see him look at her that way. She'd felt like the only girl in the world, and she hoped that she'd made him feel that way too.

As the bonfire was coming to an end, she found him, and without a word, took his hand and led him to the beach. It was the best place to see the stars, and they were far less likely to be surprised by bears or anything like that down there where it was open and Malia could hear and smell things coming from a long way off.

She took off her jacket and threw it on the ground in the sand. It wasn't big enough to keep the sand off entirely, but they could at least lay their heads on it and keep the sand (mostly) out of their hair. The crashing of the waves was relaxing, and the stars were bright overhead. As she settled onto the ground she felt that maybe she'd be able to let go of the last few weeks, even if just for a little while.

Looking up at the stars, she smiled. They were all new, compared to the ones she remembered.

"We're going to have to come up with new stories," she said finally. And it applied to the stars, and to them.

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devoided
2016-05-09 03:54 am UTC (link)

Lydia deciding to leave had been a huge blow for Stiles. Not only was she one of his best friends, but she was carrying his baby. They were taking a huge step together and he hated that his inability to support her the way she needed to be supported through such a difficult time was probably a contributing factor in her decision to return to Beacon Hills. He was grateful that Arva was able to protect the baby, even though it meant Malia was carrying two now, but as much as he had come here to get away from everyone and everything in Beacon Hills, it was weird not having Lydia here now.

It was probably a good thing that Malia had new memories and seemed to be less... impulsive and self centered now. If she was still trying to figure out how to be human and he was stuck dealing with her having a double dose of hormones, he would have been tempted to go home too. Instead, he was pretty much living with her now and figuring out how to manage the awkwardness of her remembering them being a couple.

Sure, he was attracted to her, had been pretty much since the moment that Scott called her back out of her coyote form. When they first got here and she didn't remember their hook up in Eichen, he was disappointed, because it was something he would have loved to repeat, except she was more interested in Isaac and Scott. Stiles wasn't really the grudge holding type, except when you tried to kill people he cared about, but the things she said about him being useless still stung, though he was trying to move past them and get to know her.

Some future version of him loved her, he knew that, thanks to Lydia and Isaac, but he couldn't force himself to get there. Lying on the beach with her, looking up at the stars, was a good way to do that. He reached out to twine his fingers with hers when she spoke.

"It's weird looking up and realizing that these aren't the same stars I'm used to," he said. At least he was pretty sure they weren't.

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wantsherfurcoat
2016-05-10 12:27 am UTC (link)

It had taken her time to get this way back home. There'd been so much she'd had to learn - things about working as a team, about caring about anyone other than herself. Stiles had taught her so much of it, which was why it made her so frightfully sad that he couldn't remember. But she held that inside as she squeezed his hand - tightly, but not too tightly. She didn't want to break the bones in his hand, after all - which was something she was perfectly capable of doing.

"Not much good has happened in Beacon Hills, though," she said thoughtfully. Really, maybe having new stars and a new home would be better for them. She was tired of running for her life. It seemed like so long since she'd been truly happy, at least more than a stolen moment here or there. "Here," she said carefully. "Here, we can start over. Be who we wanted to be back home."

She didn't know exactly who she wanted to be, but she wanted a chance to discover that for herself. Back home she was too busy making sure she stayed alive.

She rolled over on her side a bit to face him, his brown eyes warming her as they always did. She smiled a little, but held herself back from kissing him.

"I'm sorry everyone left."

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devoided
2016-05-10 09:54 pm UTC (link)

"It's not your fault," Stiles said, squeezing her hand at the apology. "I mean, we all came here to get away from the crazy back home. Having so many of us here meant the crazy kind of followed us." He was pretty glad that Jackson decided not to stick things out, since he was sure the other man would do nothing but make his life miserable, especially since Lydia was expecting his baby, but he really missed Scott.

He was glad that Malia was still here and even more glad that she agreed to carry his and Lydia's baby to term. "I think you're right about being here. We deserve an opportunity to have something like a normal life." Or at least as normal as life could be on an island populated by people who volunteered to help a bunch of gods and goddesses rebuild society.

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wantsherfurcoat
2016-05-11 02:29 am UTC (link)

It was true. When she'd first arrived, it felt like half of Beacon Hills was here, and she hadn't really liked that. She'd agreed to come here to get away from the mess back home, and that hadn't been possible for a long while.

"You know what's weird? That our lives have been so crappy to this point that we consider this normal."

She rolled her eyes at that, and sighed a little.

"I don't know what I was thinking when I got here, you know. Everything was so new, and I just wanted to be safe. And I didn't know the things I know now. To me, safety came from physical strength, like it does in the wild. But with people...that's not what matters. I mean, that's why people have tools, right? I've always been safer with you than with any werewolf. Because you're smart. Because you see things. Because you, more than anyone else, holds our pack together. You're the center."

She reached out to trace his cheekbone with her fingers.

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devoided
2016-05-11 09:26 pm UTC (link)

Stiles smiled. It was clear that the new memories Malia woke up with earlier in the week had changed her, made her more understanding and more human. Now that she was more savvy in the way of interacting with people, he was starting to understand why they were together back home.

"Well, I know I can't protect you the same way that Isaac and Scott could," he said. "But I will definitely do whatever I can to keep you and the babies safe and well cared for."

Now that Isaac and Lydia were gone, he felt like it was his responsibility to look after Malia. He thought that was what Lydia would want.

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wantsherfurcoat
2016-05-12 01:41 am UTC (link)

"No," she admitted. After all, Malia was nothing if not honest. "But I'm strong enough myself. Maybe what I need is the strength you have. You know things. You understand things. You see things like none of the rest of us do."

She paused, rolling over on her back again, looking up at the sky.

"I'm strong," she said. "But you're stronger than me. Except with the kind of strength that takes muscles. And you helped me get here. Like this. You can see how different I am than from when I first arrived."

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devoided
2016-05-12 01:54 am UTC (link)

That was a good way of looking at things, though Stiles wasn't sure he would agree with her about him being strong. If he was stronger, he wouldn't have let the Nogitsune take him over and Allison wouldn't have died and... he shook his head, forcing those thoughts out of his mind. The constant litany of 'what if' wasn't going to change the past and he knew that he needed to make an effort to stop thinking that way.

"You've definitely grown," he said. "Emotionally, I mean." He certainly didn't want her to think that he was calling her fat or anything crazy like that. Pregnancy hormones were terrifying and he was trying to do whatever he could to keep Malia happy and calm.

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wantsherfurcoat
2016-05-12 02:19 am UTC (link)

Malia, however, knew that she was hot and the implication that he hadn't meant made her grin. She unbuttoned her shirt a little, but not in order to come on to him or anything like that. She just wanted him to see how swollen her belly was, especially now that there were two of them in there.

She took his hand and put it on her belly.

"I don't feel them moving yet, but I think it's too early?"

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devoided
2016-05-14 12:36 am UTC (link)

It was a little surreal to touch her stomach and know that there were two babies in there - one of them his. "Yeah, I think it should be soon though," he said, trying to recall from his biology class when that happened in a typical pregnancy and calculating the adjustment rate for the shortened island version.

"If I remember right, it's usually around the 5th or 6th month," he said. "So it should be in the next couple of weeks."

He was definitely looking forward to being able to feel the babies moving and he missed having Scott or Isaac around to check in on the heartbeats, though he supposed that was something Malia could do too. He just didn't want to bug her about it all the time.

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wantsherfurcoat
2016-05-14 11:09 pm UTC (link)

Malia was looking forward to it too - she really liked the idea of feeling the baby in there. It had made her life difficult for the past month and she was really ready to get something out of it herself. Just feeling them move would definitely be enough.

She looked up at the stars again.

"Do you think you'll ever go back home?"

Malia wasn't sure if she would or not.

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devoided
2016-05-15 02:07 am UTC (link)

That was a question Stiles hadn't given much thought to. He missed his father and didn't care for the idea of never seeing him again, but given the tidbits of information he gleaned from Isaac, Lydia, and Malia about the future, there was a lot going to happen that he wasn't sure he wanted to deal with. Hiding probably wasn't the answer, but it was tempting to consider staying forever.

"I don't know," he admitted. "Maybe. But for right now, I'm content to stay here."

He assumed that if he did decide to go home, he would have the opportunity to return, like Sara had. Of course, if that meant he would remember his time here when he went back to Beacon Hills, then it would be super awkward to spend time with Lydia knowing what they did here.

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wantsherfurcoat
2016-05-15 02:50 am UTC (link)

"Me too," she said. Things back home sucked a lot, and while she missed her dad too (not Peter), she knew he'd be getting by just fine without her. And she liked having sex and being pregnant wasn't that bad. Except for the puking.

"I can tell you stuff if you want. Stuff you don't remember. I'd be glad to. I know a lot of what you went through."

She knew about Donovan, for one thing. But that wasn't it.

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devoided
2016-05-15 07:38 pm UTC (link)

"No," Stiles said immediately, not even needing to take a moment to think about whether or not he wanted to know what the future held. He had gleaned bits and pieces from his friends, knew that he was going to kill someone in self defense, and knowing more would likely make it more difficult for him to decide to return home some day. Even though he didn't have plans for that anytime soon, he didn't want to learn something that would rule it out completely.

Besides, it was pretty obvious that Malia had gone through plenty of unpleasant things of her own that she now remembered and he didn't want to make her think about those too much. She didn't need the extra stress now that she was carrying two fetuses. "We should probably head back."

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wantsherfurcoat
2016-05-16 01:43 am UTC (link)

Malia didn't really want to head back. It was peaceful out here, and she liked being away from the others. She couldn't help it - as long as Stiles was near she wasn't really a very social person. It was what it was, and she didn't see the point in changing it.

But he obviously wanted to, so with a reluctant sigh, she sat up, looking over at him with an open expression.

"Are you going to stay with me from now on? I want you to stay with me."

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devoided
2016-05-16 09:18 pm UTC (link)

Stiles got to his feet and held his hand out to help Malia up. She hadn't gained a lot of weight yet, but he knew that she was still a little off balance already and wanted to make sure he offered her whatever support he could.

"Sure," he said. "I was actually thinking that I should offer the grass hut and bed that Lydia and I got to Dr. Jones. She needs to have a good place to live if she's going to take care of you and the babies."

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	wantsherfurcoat 2016-05-16 10:29 pm UTC (link)
	She was, and in all honesty she found it hugely annoying. Probably because she was usually in such good control of her physical abilities...but being even a little off-balance made her absolutely furious. She took his hand and got to her feet. "Why?" she asked, cocking her head a little. "I'm the one who's going to be doing all the work." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	devoided 2016-05-17 12:05 am UTC (link)
	"Because giving birth can be dangerous," he explained, making sure he kept his tone patient. "And we need to make sure we have a well rested and knowledgeable doctor there to help when it's time for the babies to be born." Stiles hoped that made sense to her. "Besides, I'm not going to need it, right?" (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	wantsherfurcoat 2016-05-17 01:00 am UTC (link)
	"Oh," she said thoughtfully, then shrugged, accepting his explanation. There was something about the way he explained things to her, in the tone of his voice...that got through to her like nothing else did. "Nope. You're going to be staying with me." And she gave him a warm smile. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	devoided 2016-05-17 04:57 am UTC (link)
	When she smiled like that, it was easy for Stiles to see why he fell for her. He threaded his fingers through hers as they walked back towards their shared shelter. "I had a really nice time with you tonight," he said. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	wantsherfurcoat 2016-05-17 11:40 am UTC (link)
	"Me too," she replied. Of course, there was nothing strange about that to Malia. She always had a good time when she was with Stiles. He was the love of her life, even if he didn't really know it yet. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	devoided 2016-05-17 06:40 pm UTC (link)
	[ooc: wrap?] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	wantsherfurcoat 2016-05-17 07:40 pm UTC (link)
	[Sure!] (Reply to this) (Parent)