Stiles Stilinski (![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small} devoided) wrote in ![[info]](https://www.insanejournal.com/img/community.gif){kind=small} paradisolog,@ 2016-05-02 11:14:00 |
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WHAT: Malia has new memories
WHEN Monday morning
WHERE: Stiles & Lydia’s shelter
WARNINGS nudity and mentions of death
STATUS: complete
Malia woke with a start, trying for a long moment to figure out where she was. She blinked, and if all came back to her - she was on the island, in Isaac’s shelter. She sat up quickly, putting her hand to her belly and feeling the gentle swell of her pregnancy.
She frowned, then. Time hadn’t passed - at least not much of it. So why was her mind full of so many things it hadn’t been yesterday? She remembered Eichen House, and meeting and bonding with Stiles there. She remembered Mexico. She remembered nearly dying when they’d been quarantined during the PSAT. She remembered the dead pool and her anger with Stiles and making up with him in the hospital room and the berserkers and the dread doctors and Stiles’ grief over Donovan and her mother and the Beast…
She put a hand to her head, the influx of memories painfully disorienting. She rose, fighting the nausea that overcame her. She’d forgotten that for a moment. She threw up, and then on shaky legs went not back inside, but followed her nose to Stiles’ shelter. That was where comfort was. That was where ~home was. Caring about nothing other than finding him, she smiled when she found him asleep, kicked off her sandals, and snuggled down against his side, her head lying comfortably on his chest.
***
When Stiles felt someone curling up next to him in bed, he assumed it was Lydia, and automatically wrapped his arm around her, hand resting on the small bump that was emerging. “You shoulda woke me if you were sick,” he murmured, not even opening his eyes. It seemed like lately, Lydia was making it a point not to wake him up when her morning sickness hit and he didn’t understand why. He wanted to be there to support her through all the ups and downs of this pregnancy.
***
Malia still had all of her memories of what had happened on the island. And she knew he was having a kid with Lydia. But it really hit her at his words, and she pulled away, sitting up.
“I’m not Lydia,” she said, her voice sounding annoyed.
***
Stiles opened his eyes when he heard Malia’s voice. He pulled his arm back and sat up, hair sticking up in a million different directions as he looked around, trying to figure out what was going on. He was still in the bed and grass hut that she shared with Lydia, so why was Malia in bed wtih him?
“Uh, Malia, what are you doing here?” he asked.
***
Malia was absolutely used to him looking like that in the morning, so it didn’t phase her in the least. Of course, she had to somehow make her memories of pretty much sleeping with him every night for the last year with her memories of being on this island and hardly knowing him. It was weird. Really, really weird.
“I couldn’t sleep.”
***
“Okay,” Stiles said slowly. What the hell was happening? He rubbed his eyes, wishing that there was readily accessible coffee around. Maybe caffeine would help this make sense. “But why are you here?” he repeated. “And where’s Lydia?”
From what he could see, the sun was barely up, which meant that it was earlier than they usually got up. Of course, with her ongoing morning sickness, sleep wasn’t always a thing that Lydia managed.
***
Malia scowled. How was she supposed to know where Lydia was? She shrugged disinterestedly, as if that was the most ridiculous and pointless question she’d ever heard in her entire life.
“Why should I know where she is?”
She felt a little sick and lay back down, snuggling against him as if she’d done it a thousand times. Which, of course, she had.
“I don’t feel good.”
***
“Malia,” Stiles said, moving away from her again with a loud sigh. “Why are you here?” Maybe asking a third time would actually get him an answer. “I’m sorry you’re not feeling well, but why aren’t you with Isaac? And this is the shelter where Lydia and I live so it’s a little concerning that you’re here and she’s not.”
Especially since Lydia was also pregnant and having issues with not feeling well. No matter what kind of things Malia said on the network, he knew deep down that she would never hurt anyone, but that didn’t mean he understood why he was waking up with her instead of Lydia.
***
“Because...I come to you when I don’t feel good.” What didn’t he understand about that? She moved after him again and cuddled again, this time putting her head on his chest to make it harder for him to get away. “I just woke up and found you because this is where I’m supposed to be. Here. With you.”
It was completely natural to her. What was wrong with him?
***
Stiles felt like he was going crazy. Had he finally snapped? Was he still in Eichen House? Was the whole Sex Island thing some kind of really vivid hallucination? “Malia. You barely even like me. You certainly don’t come to me when you’re not feeling well. I don’t understand.”
***
Now it was Malia’s turn to start getting confused.
“What are you talking about? I like you. I like like you. I like like you like...a lot. We’ve been having sex for a long time now.”
Right. But not on Sex Island. Her head was hurting.
“I woke up with...new memories I think.”
***
“Wait, what? That’s a thing?” Stiles asked. “I only remember us having sex once. At Eichen House. But you said you didn’t remember that.” Sure, he knew that Lydia and Isaac both said that he and Malia were a couple in the future, but given the way things had been between them since arriving here, he wasn’t entirely sure how that worked
Except now apparently Malia suddenly remembered a bunch of stuff that hadn’t happened yet. At least not for him. And had climbed in bed with him. The bed he shared with Lydia, who was pregnant with his child. While she was pregnant with Isaac’s child.
Oh man, he felt a headache starting.
***
“I remember it. And when we got the Nogitsune out. And when Allison died. And in Mexico, and when your stupid jeep broke down, and then when we got back and Derek was a little kid and Peter got robbed and the dead pool and then your dad handcuffed you and took me out for pizza because he likes me better, I think because I made it so that you wouldn’t die a virgin in his basement, and then the Dread Doctors and you killing Donovan and my mother coming after me and all that mess.”
She shrugged.
“I didn’t count, but there was a lot of sex in there too.”
***
That was a lot of things that Stiles most certainly didn’t remember and that no one had mentioned to him. A thousand questions were on the tip of his tongue, wanting to know everything but one thing stuck out more than the rest.
“I killed someone?”
***
“Well, sort of. I mean, yes. But no. He was trying to kill you so you kind of made him fall and he impaled himself and died. So it was self defense but he’s dead because of you, yeah.”
She shrugged. She didn’t get then why he was so upset about it, and she didn’t understand it now, either. “It wasn’t a big deal until Theo was a total douche asshole bag of dicks and made it look way worse than it was.”
***
“Theo?” Stiles couldn’t think of anyone named Theo that he knew. The fact that he apparently killed someone in self defense at least made a little more sense though. He knew that would be about the only way he would ever willingly cause harm to another person. “Never mind. It’s not important.”
It was, but it wasn’t the most important thing right now. “Malia, I don’t remember any of that. I don’t know what happened or how you got all those memories, but the last thing I remember is still Allison dying. So, I mean, this is really kind of awkward.”
***
“What, me knowing stuff you don’t?” She shrugged. “Sorry. But I’m not lying. Even if you did lie to me about Peter Hale being my dad. I’m still pissed about that, you know.”
She gave him a flash of her ice blue eyes just to show him how pissed she still was about that and warn him that he probably never wanted to lie to her again. Then she sat up, stretched a little, and took off her shirt. There wasn’t the least bit of nervousness in it - she was totally used to him seeing her topless. And she was topless, since she didn’t wear a bra to bed.
“Why don’t we just do this?” It would take her mind off of things. His too.
***
Yeah, that was definitely a migraine starting to build. “Malia, put your shirt back on,” he said, squeezing his eyes shut and rubbing his hand over them. “We’re not doing anything. You’re pregnant with Isaac’s baby! Lydia is pregnant with mine. And this is just… bizarre.”
He was also confused about Peter being her father, but that would explain why Derek said they were cousins. It hadn’t really occurred to him to ask about that before.
“I seriously have no idea what is happening right now.”
***
She raised an eyebrow, but didn’t put her shirt back on. Her breasts were, in fact, bigger than he remembered, already growing from her pregnancy. She frowned at him, leaning back a bit.
“Stiles. I know Lydia is pregnant with your baby. And I know I’m pregnant with Isaac’s.” Duh. Her face softened a little, and there was almost something tender in her eyes. Tender and afraid. “But I mean...we’ve done this lots of times. You like it. We like it. And you guys...aren’t exclusive.”
So why wouldn’t he sleep with her?
***
“Malia. Remember how weird it was for you when I told you that we had sex in Eichen House?” he asked, taking a deep breath and letting it out slowly. “Because it was something that I remembered and you didn’t. Okay, so, I do not remember us having sex a lot. Which means this is really weird for me right now. And I can’t just jump into sleeping with you.”
Sure, there was a part of him that was reacting to her being topless right there next to him, but he was trying his best to ignore that.
***
Malia was thoughtful for a moment, trying to make sense of what Stiles was telling her. Suddenly she broke into a happy, understanding smile.
“Oh, that’s okay. That happens sometimes back home too. I’ll just give you a blow job, that always gets you going.”
***
“No!” Stiles insisted. “Malia, you’re not listening to me. I’m sorry that you have memories of things that I don’t remember, but that doesn’t mean things are going to change between us immediately. Or at all. You were really mean to me when we first got here.”
He slipped out of the bed and went to pull on a pair of shorts over his boxers and a t-shirt.
***
Malia’s face registered true surprise, and then visible hurt. She watched him, unblinkingly as he dressed, as disinterested as if she’d seen him do it a thousand times.
A bit awkwardly, she put her shirt back on, hugging herself around the middle.
“But you…” Her tone was more confused than anything else. “But you’re my anchor. You’re where I’m safe.” She hesitated. “Maybe I was mean to you before but that was because I wasn’t this me yet. I was the me before you found me at Eichen House. Before you gave me a reason to try.”
***
Pregnant women were apparently going to be the death of him. “But I’m not that me yet,” he said. “I mean, yes, I thought we connected at Eichen House, but I don’t remember being your reason to try or being your anchor or any of the things you remember now.”
Stiles wished he did remember because he hated the hurt look on her face right now. “I’m not trying to be mean, Malia. I’m just really, really confused. You gotta give me some time.”
***
Malia frowned.
“It’s Lydia, isn’t it?”
She liked Lydia back home, considered her a friend. But looking at it now, what Lydia had done to Stiles here...well, it was a good thing she wasn’t here at the moment.
“You think you’re in love with her. And you can’t see how much she’s using you. She doesn’t love you. She never has, as more than a friend. She doesn’t see how special you are, she just sees someone who she can manipulate to get what she wants, because you’re so besotted.”
She stood, hands on her hips.
“And you let her, because you think if you do everything perfectly she’ll fall in love with you. She won’t.” She bit her lip, biting back anger now. “You don’t have to act a certain way to make someone love you, Stiles. When someone loves you, they love you just how you are.”
Like I do.
***
“No, it’s not Lydia,” Stiles said. Yes, he still cared about her a lot, still loved her, but he knew that they weren’t ever going to be together that way and he wasn’t waiting for that to change. “We’re just friends. But I do need to be here to support her through the rest of this pregnancy.”
He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “Malia, yesterday you barely gave me the time of day. Today, you wake up with all these new memories and you expect things to be different between us. But I didn’t wake up with new memories.”
***
“No, but you remember Eichen House,” she said. “And not just the sex. You let the Nogitsune in to save me.”
She’d been devastated when she’d learned that. But it was true. He’d given in so that she’d be safe; her safety was the condition he’d given the monster.
She took a step closer to him, raising a hand to cup his cheek and meeting his chocolate brown eyes.
“But you have all the time you need. I’m not going anywhere.”
***
Stiles looked down and shrugged. “I do remember that,” he said. “And it’s not that I’m saying nothing can ever happen. I mean, Lydia and Isaac both told me that we were together in the future. But I can’t just, like, flip a switch and have things change overnight.”
Even if he wanted to, he couldn’t abandon Lydia right now. And Malia was still expecting someone else’s baby. Everything was all confusing as hell right now.
***
Malia sighed.
“Alright. Then we just become friends again,” she said, as though it was already decided. She wanted more than that, but Stiles was nothing if not stubborn.
“We were kind of lovers first before. This will be...different.”
***
“I think friends is a good place to start,” Stiles agreed. “And then we’ll… see how everything else goes, okay?”
There was a tiny part of him that wasn’t convinced this was all some sort of really bizarre dream..
***
Malia frowned, and looked away a little. She didn’t have a very good track record at ‘seeing how everything goes.’ She was silent for a moment and then looked back to him with open and piercing eyes.
“Is this your way of getting me off the topic now so you can just let it not happen?”
***
Now it was Stiles’s turn to sigh. “No, Malia, it’s me telling you that I need time to figure out what’s going on. When I’m more awake.” Though he was pretty sure he wasn’t getting any more sleep this morning. And he should also probably figure out where Lydia was. He wished Darcy was still here. He really needed some advice on how to handle all of this. Maybe he could talk to Patty.
***
Malia sighed. Why couldn’t it just make sense to him too? Why were boys so difficult.
She sighed and sat up, running a hand through her hair.
“Can I just stay here, please?”
She really didn’t want to be alone.
***
“Yeah, for a little while,” he said. “But I need to make sure Lydia is okay first. I don’t know where she is, so I’m going to send her a message.”
He could feel his left eye starting to twitch. Apparently his life here was about to get even more complicated than it already was. Just what he needed.
***
Malia sighed, fighting the tears that she felt coming to her eyes. She wasn’t going to cry. Not now. She steeled her jaw, purposely biting her tongue so that the pain would keep the tears back.
“You know, it’s okay. I’ll just...find somewhere else to sleep.”
She stood, desperately brainstorming somewhere she could go.
“I’ll just...go stay with Derek or something.”
She knew that wasn’t going to work. He was probably busy. But Stiles didn’t know that.
***
Stiles could tell that he upset her and that wasn’t what he wanted to do at all. He was just completely blindsided by her one-eighty in her attitude towards him and wasn’t really sure how to react to anything. “You can stay here, Malia,” he said, his tone a bit more gentle. “But I want to make sure Lydia is okay. Just… lay down and I’ll be right back. I promise.”
***
Right. Lydia always came first. To everyone.
She was trying to remember that they were friends, even though the memories were hard to dredge up again. She sighed, and sat on the bed, but instead of laying down, just hugged herself tightly, waiting for Stiles to do whatever he needed to do.
***
Needing a minute to himself, Stiles stepped outside the grass hut and looked around for any sign of Lydia. They didn’t spend every single night together, but she usually told him when she wasn’t going to be around, so he was a little concerned, though occasionally she did go to her old shelter when she was feeling particularly ill. He shot her a quick message on the network, but knew that if she was actually sleeping, she wouldn’t reply right away.
When he went back in, he mustered up a small smile for Malia. “Okay, you wanna try to get some sleep?” he asked. The sun was starting to come up, but he was willing to lay there with her for a while if that was what she needed. He could figure out everything else later.
***
Malia hesitated a moment, then nodded emphatically. She did want to get some sleep. Maybe everything would make more sense when she woke up...or maybe it wouldn’t. But it least she’d be less tired...and confused by the world. That was better, right?
She sighed deeply, then snuggled into the covers.
“Good night, Stiles,” she whispered.
***