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Tweak says, "They're coming for us, Francis"

Cassidy Alexandra Barnes (notbornabarne) wrote in paradisolog,
@ 2016-04-27 00:07:00

Entry tags:

~cassie barnes (notbornabarne), ~ruby lucas (rubywolf)

WHO: Cassie Barnes & OTA (or narrative)
WHERE: By the waterfall, and around
WHEN: 4/27 middle of the night
WHAT: Some memories are just...not easy to get over, even in paradise. Nightmares, in other words.
WARNINGS: Slightly graphic imagery.
STATUS: Incomplete/Open

I was looking for the breath of a life, a little touch of heavenly light...

Cassie was incredibly happy to be in this...paradise. She honestly was. It was damn near perfect from everything that she could tell. The only problem with being in paradise was where she'd come from, or maybe the more correct statement was when she'd come from? She'd been on the cusp of death and she knew it. God, she'd been so close to being bitten by one of the un-dead that she had practically felt the stereotypical flash of her life before her very eyes, and then.....the offer had come from the beautiful woman. The offer that she couldn't possibly pass up. Who could pass up the chance to actually live? Cassie certainly couldn't. She wanted to live so badly. Her preference, of course, would have been to live with Sere in a situation much different from the one they'd found themselves in...fighting for survival. Fate hadn't had that in store for her.

Apparently, it had wanted her in paradise with the woman that she loved, but it was so much more complicated than that at the same time.

Sere wasn't the same girl that Cassie had fallen head-over-heels for, or at least not completely. She'd changed, and Cassie understood that it was from necessity. The fact that she'd had to do that, to be that person without her made Cassie feel guilty, though. She should have been faster. She should have been more capable, but the fact of the matter was that she wasn't. She didn't think she could ever be the same type of strong survivor that Chester was, as she was called now, and she wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a bad one.

She'd always been happy with who she was, but then again she had never been through an apocalypse before either.

And now that that was behind her she couldn't leave the thoughts, or what had happened, behind completely. She'd gotten lucky her first night in paradise, considering Ray's help and being so tired. Tonight, though, she wasn't near as lucky. Her dreams were haunted by ripping flesh, and experiencing the death that she had narrowly escaped. It was after waking up twice that Cassie found herself giving up and needing to move, to....do something, anything. Splashing her face with water seemed like as good an answer to her dilemma as any. It was almost as if she were on autopilot as she padded to the waterfall, leaning near the edge to gather water in her hands to splash her face. The dripping water from her face almost hid the tears that had begun to seep out from the nightmares.

She wasn't normal anymore. She wasn't the old, carefree Cassie. So, maybe those moments leading up to her demise had changed her too? Who the hell knew? Scrubbing her face for a moment before splashing herself again Cassie sat back, trying to get the images of rotting flesh and teeth coming at her...and of Sere's back far ahead of her, safe from the onslaught she had been facing before arriving here. It didn't feel quite as easy to settle down here....and to enjoy the safety, camaraderie, and society building that was going on. Cassie had thought, or maybe wished, that it would come naturally like everything had seemed to before. It hurt to feel the slight struggle here.

Sucking in several deep breaths, the young woman reminded herself that it was okay to feel...weird and panicked and scared still. She'd been through a lot. So, that made it okay? Right? God, she hoped so. It was easier to tell herself those things for Sere....that she'd really been through a lot and that she understood that. It was much easier to tell herself that Sere needed patience and she shouldn't overwhelm her because she had been through so much. It was harder not to expect much more from herself. She wanted to acclimate, and to find a normal life again, so she could be the strong one, for a change. She couldn't even imagine the hell that the woman she loved had been through. She didn't know how things were going to go in general, but she wanted to be strong. And she just didn't feel it, not right now.

A groan escaped and Cassie closed her eyes, trying to fight off the feelings that the nightmares, and everything else, had brought. She needed comfort, and as she buried her fingers into her hair, with her elbows resting on her knees and her knees in front of her chest, Cassie hummed...with none of the proper breath control that she should have when doing anything remotely like humming or singing. It was quiet, and familiar, a song she had hummed and sang to Noah about a million times. Wasn't being in paradise supposed to be easy? Wasn't everyone here supposed to be happy?

Was she screwing things up here? Cassie couldn't help the fear that crept up, worried about the potential of being sent back, despite what Sere had told her about being allowed to stay forever. It was probably irrational, no, scratch that...it was definitely irrational, but it came all the same. She just wanted to settle in and have everything be easy. And she was going to make it happen, somehow, for her and for Sere (or Chester, whatever she wanted to go by). Cassie just wanted to live, so badly. The low hum of Baby Mine wasn't loud enough to carry, Cassie was pretty sure, but it was slightly calming, if only because it was something else to focus on for the moment, to try and distract her from the fears that wanted to reach out, and claw at her like the walkers.

She was safe here. She was going to live and be happy here. She just had to....work through this. She'd do it. She was determined. It'd get easier, she just had to keep telling herself that. It would all get easier. Not everyone got a second chance like this, and she was extremely lucky. So, she just needed to focus on that.

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rubywolf
2016-04-28 03:21 am UTC (link)

It was late, but Ruby couldn't sleep, so she decided to head out to go for a run through the jungle. Going alone might not be the best bet, given that there were definitely predators out there, but she could handle herself if she ran into anything. And worse case scenario, if she screamed loud enough, the other werewolves would hear her and come running. She assumed.

She loved being in her wolf form and being free to run. The worst part about being trapped for all those months by the witch was being stuck in the cottage and not having an opportunity to run. Well, that and not being able to talk or have any personal agency. At least she managed to keep her mind intact. Being stuck in her other form for so long ran the risk of her losing her human self completely and that would have been the absolute worst.

But then Kamari appeared to her and offered her a chance to be free from the witch's shackles and she couldn't say no to the offer. She was beyond grateful to the Moon Goddess — and all the other gods and goddesses here — for getting her out of there. Being here was a lot of hard work, but that was nothing new to Ruby and a lot of the skill she learned growing up in the Enchanted Forest were proving useful here.

When she heard someone humming, she couldn't help but head in that direction. She hadn't really expected to run into anyone out here at this time of night and was concerned that it was a new arrival who couldn't figure out the bracelet or how to find the main camp. She didn't think the gods would bring someone here in the dark, but it was possible the person had been wandering around lost for a while. The scent was vaguely familiar when she got close enough to catch it on the wind, which meant it was someone who had been around the main camp, though Ruby couldn't put a name to it.

Deciding that she would likely be less intimidating in her human form, even naked, she shifted back and made sure to rustle the leaves as she approached the other girl, not wanting to startle her.

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notbornabarne
2016-04-29 06:53 pm UTC (link)

Cassie's panic didn't make her deaf, luckily, though it didn't help that the rustling startled her. The blond's head whipped around in the direction that the sound had originated from, afraid that it was one of them....one of the un-dead coming to amble after her and sink it's teeth into her flesh again. Even in the dark she could tell that the other woman wasn't lumbering in the fashion that the reanimated corpses did. So, there was a minute amount of relief over that fact.

"Oh shit!" Escaped the young woman's mouth before she could stop it, her hand going to her chest. Much as it was a relief that she wasn't about to have to run from something, or a former someone, that wanted to eat her she was still startled and forced to take a few deep breaths. "You scared me....sorry." Cassie admitted, shakily, trying to force her body to relax after that.

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rubywolf
2016-04-30 03:53 pm UTC (link)

"I'm so sorry," Ruby apologized. "I was trying not to startle you, but I guess there really wasn't any way to do that." Other than not approach at all, but Ruby didn't really feel like that was an option, especially now that she saw the girl. It was clear she was struggling with something and Ruby would have felt terrible leaving her out here to deal with it on her own.

She moved to sit near the other girl, obviously not ashamed of her body, and offered a gentle smile. "I'm Ruby."

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notbornabarne
2016-04-30 05:05 pm UTC (link)

Cassie nodded a little and forced a smile that didn't actually meet her eyes, waving the apology off because she didn't think the other girl had done it on purpose. "It's okay, really. I think I'm just...easily startle-able." Cassie explained, knowing that it was probably the truth. And it'd be the truth for a while to come considering what she'd been through...what she'd escaped. It wasn't as easy to just...be in paradise as Cassie hoped.

That didn't mean she was giving up.

It just wasn't that easy. Cassie lifted her hand in a bit of a wave before offering Ruby her hand. "I'm Cassie, it's nice to meet you." The blond hadn't forgotten her manners, even in this state. And though she wasn't exactly blind to the nudity of the other woman, Cassie didn't gawk. She found the other woman attractive, but her status was complicated with Sere, no wait Chester, being here. Sex and gorgeous bodies like Ruby's weren't foremost on Cassie's mind. "I didn't realize that anybody else was up and about...I hope I didn't bother you?"

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rubywolf
2016-04-30 06:05 pm UTC (link)

"Not at all," Ruby said, shaking the other woman's hand and giving her a quick once over. She was pretty, but was obviously dealing with stuff and Ruby didn't really need to get involved with that, though she was obviously willing to listen if Cassie wanted to talk.

She shook her hand briefly and offered a smile. "You must be pretty new, since we haven't met yet," she said. "I was among the first group of volunteers to arrive, so I've been here almost a month now."

It was kind of weird how fast time seemed to be going, though they had done a lot in that time.

"By the way, I've been making soap, so if you need any, make sure you come and see me. We have a pretty good stock built up. And if you want to learn how to make it, I'm happy to teach you." The more people making it, the easier it was to maintain their supply. Especially now that she was focusing more of her time on tending the livestock since she had experience with it.

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notbornabarne
2016-04-30 06:13 pm UTC (link)

Cassie let go of Ruby's hand once they'd shook, and she couldn't help but wonder why she was up? Why was she naked too? Cassie had seen one other girl walking around similarly, but at the time the question hadn't come to mind. Now, though, in the quiet of the night she couldn't help but wonder silently.

"I haven't even been here three days yet." Cassie admitted a bit sheepishly. Not even here a full week and she was having some sort of...emotional crises...she guessed that was the way to categorize it? It was good to know that this woman, though, was one of the initial group to arrive. "You've probably gotten pretty used to this place by now, then, huh?" Cassie probed, tentatively.

Would she be....as natural and seemingly settled as this woman in a month's time? God, she hoped.

Cassie perked a little bit at both the idea of soap, and the idea of something to help with. She'd felt so....useless when it came to protecting and surviving. Making soap, though? That seemed like something she could do without screwing it up? "God, soap sounds magical....and I'd love to learn how to make it. I want to help out, to be useful." Cassie admitted. "I'm not really good at building or the survivalist sort of stuff, but I think I could make soap if you're really willing to teach it." It would keep her busy too, which Cassie knew couldn't be a bad thing.

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rubywolf
2016-04-30 07:20 pm UTC (link)

Ruby nodded. "Yes, I'm pretty settled. We've made a decent amount of progress as a whole." They were making a good dent in the medical facility, which was a hugely important endeavor since they had several pregnant ladies around already. She still wasn't quite ready to take that leap, but she knew she was going to want to contribute that way eventually.

"I'm definitely happy to teach you to make soap," she said. "And if you want, I can also teach you how to tend the chickens and cows and sheep. I've been spending a lot of time on those things since I have experience."

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notbornabarne
2016-04-30 08:02 pm UTC (link)

Cassie wasn't sure if it was a relief, or a worry, to know that Ruby was so settled. It sort of gave the blond a timeline....one where she'd put expectations on herself. Logically, she knew she didn't need to do that...and at the same time she couldn't help it. She wanted to settle in, to feel normal, and to be happy but she couldn't force it. "I was definitely impressed with everything when I got here." Cassie admitted.

Finding a way to be useful was a good first step, though. Soap was a necessity, and helping with livestock....a godsend right about now. "I'd love to learn how to tend to the animals too, honestly. I don't know much about it, but I really want to be useful and find ways to help." Cassie's smile, this time, managed to reach her eyes slightly, hoping that having things to do WOULD help.

"You have really good timing. This place is so peaceful I was kind of caught up in the shitstorm that I was stuck in before getting here." Cassie admitted, not ashamed to be incredibly grateful toward Ruby right about now.

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rubywolf
2016-04-30 10:08 pm UTC (link)

"I think most of us were stuck in unpleasant situations back home," Ruby said. At least she assumed there was a reason that people came here when Arva invited them to come here. "It definitely takes time to transition to life here."

She wasn't going to ask Cassie about the 'shitstorm' she was dealing with. If the other girl wanted to talk about it, she would listen, but she thought it might be better to redirect the conversation and help her look forward.

"The domestic animals are pretty new," she explained. "So we're still getting into the swing of things with them. Well, the goats and sheep have been here, but they're in a pasture on the other side of the island where there's good grazing." It was a bit of a hike, but it made sense to leave them there. "Do you have any experience tending animals? It's cool if you don't. I can definitely teach you."

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notbornabarne
2016-05-01 04:02 am UTC (link)

Cassie nodded, agreeing with Ruby. It wasn't something that the petite woman had thought about before, but that didn't make it any less accurate. There had to be some sort of reason for everyone here to agree to come...and that meant no matter what was happening that they were absolutely motivated enough to decide leaving everything behind was the better decision. Even if not everyone was dead, or being eaten, their reasons were no less valid. Cassie felt a bit selfish for a moment for dwelling like she had been, but she also couldn't exactly control it either. "I honestly hadn't thought of that yet, but you're right, on both accounts."

Cassie would get used to things here, it'd just take time. She was determined. And right now she was glad for Ruby and the lifeline she was offering.

"They're new for the little community, then?" Cassie asked, to clarify the statement for herself before she gave a sheepish shake of her head. "The most experience that I have is a dog...maybe a cat. And I've been to petting zoos...that's about it." She couldn't help the half wince on her face, wishing that she did have more experience to offer in this case. "I'm a quick leaner, though, in a lot of things?"

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rubywolf
2016-05-02 07:06 pm UTC (link)

Ruby couldn't resist smirking a little at the quick learner comment. She was sure that Cassie didn't mean anything remotely dirty, but they were on what was affectionately called Sex Island and Ruby was completely nude since she had been out running, so no one could really blame her for letting her mind wander a bit.

"Yeah, the gods and goddesses who are in charge of this place actually talked to us on the network a little while back," she said. And, yum, the God of the Land was a total hottie, though she wasn't going to share that observation. "And we talked about some of the things we'd like and the dude who's responsible for the land said that if we built a place to keep the chickens and cows, he'd provide them. So we did."

It hadn't been that difficult to build a large pen. Sure, it probably wasn't the strongest structure ever, but it seemed to be doing the job so far and that was what mattered. "I'm happy to teach you anything you want to learn." Yes, there was a hint of flirtation in her tone.

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notbornabarne
2016-05-03 05:28 pm UTC (link)

Cassie didn't realize, initially, the slightly dirty connotation that had come out of her mouth. Maybe it was that she was so caught up in wanting to feel useful, and not having been good enough at the time of her death....or maybe it was just because most of her flirting for the past few years had been lavished on her girlfriend? Either way the blond did note the smirk....and then the generally flirty tone, only realizing belatedly that there was even that note to their conversation.

On some level it was flattering, to think that even without trying she could not only flirt, but get another person to flirt with her. On another level she was very much in love with her girlfriend (that was the title she was going to stick with for now). Though, maybe once she and Sere were back in better places inviting a third beautiful woman into the throng of things could happen...and even if not Cassie was allowed to look, and probably flirt a little. Still, though.

"I think the gods and goddesses of this place are pretty generous." Cas commented, definitely feeling that they had to be considering Sere was here....they'd gifted animals.... She really wanted to be here because of that, and more, really. "For now I'll stick with learning how to make soap and tend to the animals." Cassie managed a smile. "Those are things I don't know how to do already, but can be taught." Cassie managed, slightly flirtatious....though really she didn't manage it quite as well as she had once upon a time before the outbreak.

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rubywolf
2016-05-03 05:58 pm UTC (link)

The slight awkwardness of the flirting wasn't lost on Ruby. She had no intention of making Cassie uncomfortable, so she consciously dropped her own flirty tone. "I'm happy to help with both of those things," she assured the other girl. "I'm not that difficult to find around camp. Or you can always shoot me a message."

Ruby liked the bracelet's communication capabilities. It was nice not having to rely on letters and messengers riding horseback to communicate with people over distances like they had back in the Enchanted Forest.

"I should probably get back to camp now," she said. "You want to walk back with me or stay here for a little longer?" If Cassie wanted to walk back together, Ruby didn't mind wandering through the jungle naked, but if she was heading back on her own, she'd transform back to wolf form and run instead.

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notbornabarne
2016-05-03 09:15 pm UTC (link)

"I'll definitely do that." Cassie promised, very seriously. She wanted to be of use. She wanted to settle in and contribute to things here. And she appreciated the other woman for being...helpful and kind. "And thank you, I really appreciate the offer to help. I kind of needed that right now." Cass shared, not ashamed of that.

She wasn't one to share her entire life story on the first meeting, but it wouldn't take long for Cassidy to make friends. Ruby was going to be on that list too, the blonde could already tell. Then again, Cass tried to make a friend out of most people.

It was late, god, Cass could tell. She just didn't want to go back to sleep for more nightmares. She didn't want to dream about moaning, groaning, walking corpses. "I should head back too....so with you, Ruby." Cassie forced that light smile again, moving to her feet. "Hopefully no more nightmares." Cassie spoke, voice hopeful, unable to help but speak openly, even if not over-sharing.

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rubywolf
2016-05-03 10:30 pm UTC (link)

Ruby understood nightmares and she gave Cassie a sympathetic look as she stood, offering her hand to help the other girl up. "Where are you staying?" she asked. "I mean, if you don't want to stay alone to try and keep the nightmares at bay, you're welcome to crash with me." It wasn't a surefire way to keep them from happening, but in Ruby's experience, not sleeping alone made it less likely for her to have nightmares.

The offer was made innocently. Despite her earlier flirtation, Ruby was able to sense that Cassie wasn't ready to make that kind of connection here and she wasn't the type who was going to push at all. "I promise I'll put on clothes," she added lightly. "It's... kind of a long story why I'm out here like this." She didn't know if Cassie was aware of the existence of werewolves or what her thoughts might be about them, but it was too late to get into that particular conversation at this point.

Either way, she started walking back towards the main camp area. Her own shelter was a bit outside of the main area, as most people were setting their own up, but it made sense to at least head in that general direction.

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