Lydia gave him a weak sort of smile that fell short of her eyes. She wasn't proud of the person she used to be. That person was practically a stranger to her, now. Largely a defense mechanism to maintain her place on the social ladder, she'd spent so long looking down her nose at everyone who wasn't considered a "cool kid." Funny enough, Allison was the one who changed that for her, too. Most people didn't bother with the new girl, but Allison was pretty and Lydia figured she'd fit nicely, especially since she'd been really well dressed. Initially, she'd decided that Allison was going to be her new best friend because she'd said her mother was a buyer and that sounded like a whole lot of free clothes to Lydia. It was easily the best decision she'd ever made in her life...and also the most painful one.
"Yeah, well...to be fair to you, that's because I was a bitch when we were younger." She paused, took a deep breath and sighed, trying not to look as bitter as she felt when she tacked on, "or, depending on who you ask, I guess, I'm still a bitch."
To be honest, Lydia hadn't ever really noticed that she was on the fringes of the pack until Allison died. That was when it had really hit her. Without Allison linking the rest of them to her, she had quickly become a mostly forgotten afterthought, left to mourn alone and try to keep herself from losing her mind as she learned to deal with the voices and how to try to use them to actually save a life instead of trying and failing, the way she had when it had mattered the most to her.
Hearing Isaac say it...Lydia felt validated for the first time. And she started to cry again, in spite of the fact that the weak smile on her face contradicted it. "...I wish you'd stayed," she admitted. She sniffed again and choked back on a sob. These hormones were going to turn her into one of those women, apparently. "I know why you left, now, but I wish you'd stayed. And I was so mad at you. Isaac, I was so fucking mad at you for leaving me there, because I know we weren't close, but we're the only ones who were still that close with her and you were all I had left of her. And you were gone. And maybe it wasn't fair for me to be upset, but I didn't know. ...I didn't know, you know, what happened out there. All I knew was that I felt her die. I felt it...I felt it," she said and the last time it came out, it was almost inaudible.