As the last syllables left her lips, Clarke instantly regretted saying as much as she did about herself. This place, these people, they didn't deserve to be brought down because of her. Darcy came here to find peace, love, and build a community. She guessed all of these people felt much the same way as Darcy. They were here with a purpose, a chance at a better existence and Clarke didn't want them to know what she'd done ever. Besides the obvious, saying anything specific about her previous life would go against everything this place stood for. Her actions destroyed a thriving society. Where this place was meant to foster, bring in new life, and watch it grow, Clarke had done just the opposite. She'd stolen how many young lives? How many lives in general? It wasn't just the countless souls of Mount Weather either. Before that, she'd killed Grounders, she'd killed other members of the 100 or was an indirect cause of it. Wells, Charlotte were two perfect examples of the last sentiment. With so much haunting her, sleeping was a luxury left to be experienced by someone else. Even with eyes open, conscious restored, nothing could ever take away those faces from those times. Not ever.
The feel of Darcy's hand on her shoulder, warm and soft, brought a smile to Clarke's lips again. It was such an enduring, sweet gesture and the blond appreciated it more than she could ever know. Would such kindness remain if she knew exactly what Clarke did? Part of her didn't think it would, but then again, she'd said she'd done bad things, horrible things, and Darcy remained seated beside her on the beach, stalled in her presence, and that told Clarke a lot of things. They could simply be on different levels of understanding what a sentiment too, but Clarke knew she wasn't the only one here who'd dealt with horrible things or been the one to deal those blows. There was a good chance that woman next to her knew more about her certain kind of bad choices than Clarke gave her. While she remained leery, uneasy, she had to take the leap of faith. Clarke had to trust the people here. She had to trust Darcy. She had to think the best of them because that's what they were trying to do for her. Think only the best of her.
"Thanks," Clarke replied sincerely. "You're right. I need to focus on that and not on everything I couldn't save or prevent." That list was long and past actions couldn't be corrected. Time travel was not a thing yet and she knew some of the actions, she would still take to this day if the situation fell into the same pattern as it had then. Those situations had given her no choice, but to take the actions she had. She knew she couldn't regret that. She'd killed people, but she'd also saved a lot of lives too. She just hoped that one day the latter would outweigh the former. Being here gave her a good shot at that though and Clarke couldn't wait to help bring new, beautiful babies into this world. To have the chance to make a community thrive was a gift and it was a second chance Clarke was not going to waste. "It means a lot." She raised a hand and gently placed it upon the other woman's; gaze settling on Darcy's face. Again, the thought arose that she was pretty, genuine in herself and in the comfort she shared with Clarke.