return text;
Okay, I am doing okay, but for five years I wasn't doing anything close to okay. I didn't know who I was, I couldn't BE who I was even if I figured it out, and I was searching so hard for normal that I made all the wrong choices, including almost marrying a sweet guy who didn't even know my first name. I mean, come on, what kind of functional relationship could I have when the guy kissing me goodnight was calling me 'Sandra'? It's Mom's name.
And then I came here and I really wasn't doing all that much better. The Hyperion was my new 'safe', and I was too afraid to leave because the people I lost were there, I was too scared of being alone, and I was too afraid to stand up for how much I hated Gabriel being allowed there after he killed Peter, until I finally just snapped and freaked out and left.
And it was the best thing I ever did, but even then things didn't just happen overnight. It was slow and it was hard. There were tons of times I wanted to go back to the Hyperion just so I wasn't alone, or not leave the Winchesters, or wonder if I should have been killing a demon instead of going to the garage that day.
So yeah, I found things, but it took time and a lot of things I hope you don't have to go through to get them. But you'll get them.
I know he got in your head a bunch of different ways, and I know it's not something you can just let go, I just want you to remember it's Sylar. You can't let things he said define who you are.
I wanted to understand him too, but not so much the ability as how he lived 400 years and kept letting himself care about new people. I'd already accepted that if he didn't feel anything anymore, and I felt less than I used to, someday I wouldn't feel anymore. It was the idea of outliving everybody that got me worse, so maybe in that respect, he is better than me, because he could still connect. But that still doesn't make him us or us him.
Admit it, you think he's sexy. And vampire or not, he's still a guy and they're the last to figure out anything.
I think he's pretty much made a profession of that, so yeah, Nathan would so freak about Spike + things done at Spike's club. But, he freaked about me and Dean, so there's that too.