He hesitated a long moment. Did she really want to know? What if it made it all worse? Swallowing hard, Sam gave the scenery outside another long stare before he turned from the window and quietly stepped around Faith, moving to sit at the space opposite her. Sam looked down at his hands and exhaled softly.
"She had a knife," he started. Like a flash, the image of the knife appeared in his head. Ruby's hands extending it out to him, urging him to drag the blade across her flesh. "We'd cut..." He reached forward, hesitated another moment, and then warily took Faith's wrist with his hands. He dragged a finger across a vein, indicating the general area. "And then...then it'd all come out." Red. Lots and lots of red. Just flowing from the wound, waiting for him to take it all for himself. His hands began to shake and he quickly released her wrist and brought his arms around himself, looking down as a sudden flash of need struck him.
He could almost taste it.
"Found a few places," Sam said, voice quieter than before. He was trying to keep himself from freaking out. It wasn't easy. "Dark corner in the park, an alley behind a building. One time we went to a motel, but it was only to experiment with extreme doses..." He screwed his eyes shut, remembering all that blood that had been presented to him. Repeatedly. So much blood.
"I felt like...like I was..." He wasn't like this, that was for certain. "I can remember feeling strong. Unstoppable. And this..." He reached for his heart with an unsteady hand. "Nothing could hurt me. Not in here. It was all...calm. Nice."