She still didn't see it, she didn't need to be saved. She didn't need that at all, she hadn't done anything to deserve it from her point of view. But then she'd look at him. And he'd tell her about Sam and she didn't feel as good as she once had.
But she'd believed one thing, so solidly, for so long.
When he threw the ball she winced, he might as well have thrown it right at her.
"Then what do I have? I don't have you, I don't have Sam, or the plan. Ben hates me, the Winchesters want me dead. And all I can say is they probably have the right. I didn't ever want to hurt Sam, can you see that at least. I knew it would hurt him, but I thought he'd come through the other side. And now you're saying he wouldn't have. Telling me I destroyed him, I dont want to hear that. I don't"