Allana listened to his ranting, her heart aching both for him, and for the angry and frightened girl that she knew herself to be at the tender age of eighteen. It was like trying to mix two polar opposites. There was no surprise at all that the two hadn't managed to make it work.
"She's afraid," she finally said quietly, not wanting to upset him further but hoping she could make him see at least part of the reason Amelia was so determined to be Amelia.
"For a very long time following your death, I was forced to be someone different. My entire life changed virtually overnight, and while I was still with my grandparents, I couldn't let on that they were my grandparents," she explained. "My hair was dyed, my name was changed, and I was told to forget the life I'd had before if I wanted to life long enough to see that life again."
She offered a gentle smile. "Of course, it wasn't said quite that way, but it's certainly how I felt at the time." She shook her head, almost fondly, at such a distant memory.
"At some point, I realized that it would be best to simply comply rather than question the situation. I was six, at the time, and finally took the name Amelia to heart. However, in order to do what they asked of me, I couldn't simply be Amelia in public. I had to become her." She stopped, sighing softly. Her own attention wen to the fountain as well, her expression an unreadable one.
"Unfortunately, at some point, I not only became Amelia, I ceased being Allana and became quite fearful at the thought of having to become her once more. It wasn't until I began extensive training with my Master that I realized I truly could be both." She shook her head slightly, red locks bouncing across her shoulders, as her gaze slid back to Jacen.
"I won't for one instant pretend that I was an easy teenager to get along with. It's a wonder anyone was able to tolerate me, really. I do know, though, that my reasons for not wishing to be Allana during that point in my life had nothing to do with rejecting Anakin, or even my own heritage, as much as it was simply me, fearful of losing who I was all over again."