nicholas jonas (yourecold) wrote in parabolical, @ 2008-10-02 17:08:00 |
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Entry tags: | nick jonas, open |
Who: Nick Jonas & Open.
What: Entering the classic Bridge to Terabithia Denial Stage.
When: During the day.
Where: The streets, he's not in his right mind.
Rating: PG 13 for depressing.
Warning: Just a tad long. Nick has a lot of thoughts, mkay?
After spending the last twenty-four hours locked in his room, staring blankly at the wall, only to stop to see what was going on in the message boards - Nick had decided to finally leave it. To get out of the dark room that he had been inhabiting, and had been letting drag him down even further. He didn't feel anything while he was sitting in that room, and he didn't know if he really wanted to. However, he was a creature of habit, and after spending so long avoiding the outside world, he had to get out and see it again. Despite the lack of what he was feeling, or the need for what he wanted to be feeling, rather, he didn't want to be in his room anymore. That being said, he didn't want to be around his brothers, his only blood family here or Elisabeth and Arthur, his surrogate family. It wasn't like he would say anything of use to them, so he was heading out.
As soon as he opened the front door, the sun outside blinded his dark conditioned eyes and it took him a moment to get adjusted to the light before he could close the door behind him and walk out onto the streets. His hands were stuffed in the front pockets of his tight, dark blue jeans and his unkempt hair was a frazzled mess on the top of his head. If anyone took so much as one look at the boy, they would be able to tell he hadn't looked in the mirror this morning. But there was no morning for Nick, the previous day rolled into the new one as though it was the same day and while nothing had changed from yesterday, the youngest Jonas was a little less apathetic and a little more in denial.
Walking down the street, he half expected Alex to come out and join him. With that cute smile of hers and some quirky conversation starter that would force him to come out of his shell and be that little more outgoing, just for her. In fact, although he was numb, none of it seemed real to him. He hadn't accepted her death, so to him she was still alive. Sitting in the house somewhere, or halfway down to meet him to stop him from walking off. Telling him that he was talking crazy for thinking she had gone off somewhere. So every time he would spot a girl with dark hair, he had to stop himself from gripping their shoulders and turning them around to face him. He had already done that twice, somewhere in between walking from the house to the traffic lights he had suddenly come face to face with.
How long had it taken for him to get there, exactly? He didn't know, and instead of crossing like any normal person would, he stood perfectly still. The boy with his hands stuffed in his jeans and his eyes glued to his black Converses, perfectly identical to his girlfriend's. When it suddenly became to clear to him that she wouldn't come to him just standing there, he began to cross, barely watching where he was going and narrowly missing a car by a split second. The man in said car yelled abuse at him, and only then did Nick look up to give him a quizzical, barely there look. "Sorry," he mumbled, despite the driver having left already. Sighing deeply, the boy took a seat in a shop window with a ledge and stared out onto the street with a slight squint. He was suddenly feeling a whole lot of regret over leaving the safe confines of his room. Being out in the open suddenly made him feel small and empty.