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lavender is sure that living is worse (lavishly) wrote in pandorarpg,

"Michael, there is something wrong with me." Lavender had not once believed that she was truly fine, just like she hadn't really made much work in moving past the Greyback issue. She didn't see it as something she could move beyond, it was just a part of who she was, horrible as that might be. "In fact, now there are two somethings wrong with me and I'm now I'm even more sure they are related.

"And I'm pretty sure that I'm going to get someone killed, if I haven't already." Lavender couldn't help but think of Penelope Clearwater then. Even if that was before the database was stole, Lavender had known Penelope was having nightmares - she had met with her once before. And now she was dead. Lavender sighed, taking to bandaging the wound now. It was easier to focus on this as she continued. Even knowing that Michael was probably going to respond better than Seamus, she was still hesitant.

"Yesterday, when I went to see Professor Trelawney she told me somethings, like how someone close to me is going to fatally wounded and that the marks are about seeing us for what we are, that we're being punished by someone seeking vengeance." Lavender let go of his hand to wipe her face with the back of the hands as the tears that never fully stopped started to take over again. "And, Michael, I can't do that, I just can't live with the knowledge that people are getting hurt or dying because of me or even because they are just close to me and I care about them."