farley trask / jim gordon (commissioners) wrote in ourtrueselves, @ 2009-09-27 00:23:00 |
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Entry tags: | allison 'al' peabody, farley trask |
Who: Farley Trask and Al Peabody
What: The big talk
When: September 26 - very early Saturday morning
Where: New Orleans, LA
Warnings: Issues, angst, and adult type situations
It took Al a little longer than she thought it would to get ready and to the MTN in London. Thankfully, someone was there to let her through to New Orleans, but some part of her was hoping that it wouldn't be open. She knew that eventually they really would have to have this talk, that they would have to say what the wanted, and she wasn't sure she wanted to know exactly what Farley wanted. He had a little girl to think about and family. Al had family of her own, but they really didn't expect her to stay close by - they stopped trying to get her to come back her sophomore year of college.
So, she waited patiently for them to do whatever voodoo they did so well, her stomach already queasy. The ex-grad student had had a good interview with some of the faculty at both Oxford and the University of London; it wasnt' a guarantee to getting in, but it didn't hurt. She nodded to the tech who said she could go, and she stepped through.
Al didnt' know what to expect on the other side, but she would face it. Even if it was the usual laissez faire Farley, not that she really wanted that. She'd handle it. She'd been a fucking queen in another life; she could do this. Of course, by that logic, she was a really stupid queen who got herself killed. Here went everything...
Farley waited on the other side of the MTN, hands in pockets and more nervous than he should have been. He hadn't seen Al in a week - which was hard, harder than he expected - and even though he wanted her to come back, he really did not want to have this conversation. He didn't want to think about whatever she was thinking about doing. He liked things the way they were, and if she liked England as much as she said she did... Yeah, Farley wasn't looking to this conversation, not one bit.
But he still couldn't help but smile when he saw her come out of the MTN.
Al couldn't help the smile either. She had missed him, very much so. She'd wanted nothing more than to run into his arms, as if they were in some black and white movie with the orchestral music building to that happy crescendo which signaled everything would be okay now that the lovers were back together. Only, the conversation they had to have made the soundtrack fizzle and fall flat, very flat. She walked up to him, her smile fading just a little.
"Hi. Didn't know if you'd be here, or if you'd be at home. It's a little early after all. Or late." She was just within arm's reach and feeling more than a little awkward.
"Hey," he said, keeping his hands in his pockets. Yes, this was awkward, and he wanted to at least give her a welcome back hug, but for some reason, he couldn't. He shrugged, trying to stay casual. "Lilia's with my parents, and, y'know, I figured you'd need a ride, so here I am." He looked down at the ground and then back up again. "You want to go home and talk, or stop somewhere to eat? I'm sure some place is open. Might be a little shady, though."
"Not really hungry." Al's head tilted back to the MTN slightly; that really wasn't a big deal actually. She'd been through it enough times to be somewhat used to it, but it seemed like a better reason than saying she was nervous. He didn't seem all that bothered by it all, but then, he really never was, was he?
"We could drive around, or something." She felt like she was back in high school, trying to figure out what to do for the night with someone who was but wasn't her boyfriend. Going back to the house seemed so final, or maybe it didn't. She didn't know; it wasn't like she really had had this sort of conversation before. Something close, but not quite.
He smiled ruefully and scratched the back of his head. "Mm, I don't know about that. Could be dangerous." He looked at her and sighed, then stepped closer to her and gave her a soft kiss on her forehead. "It's late. Let's just go home, all right? I'll make some coffee." If this conversation was going to happen, it was better to have it where they were both relatively comfortable. Or something.
"Driving could be dangerous?" Al blinked at the comment, but she didn't question further than that. She kissed his jaw as he got close; they were being almost chaste, but then they weren't the most publicly affectionate types.
"Okay. Coffee would be good, I guess." She grabbed her bags and started for the exit, for the car waiting outside, for the home and the coffee. This was going to be a very strange conversation. "Did they ask you to be Class Mom this past week? They shouldn't have, but still, these teachers sometimes."
He laughed a little and followed her closely. "No, they didn't, thank God. I think they found someone else a little more suited to the job than me." Good thing too, because Farley couldn't bake cupcakes to save his life. He held the door open for Al, more out of habit than courtesy this time, and waited for her to go ahead of him. "What about you? Was it just the one run-in with the cops, or was that the extent of your lawlessness?"
He meant for that to sound like a joke, like he was teasing her, but it came out a little more bitter than he intended. Which wasn't good. The way he said it, it sounded like he was criticizing her potentially illegal conduct - something he had no right to do, considering his job. His bitterness was just misdirected, that was all. He had only expected her to be gone for the weekend, and she stayed for a week, and he still wasn't looking forward to this conversation. But Al wouldn't be able to get all of that just out of his tone. He should've just kept his mouth shut.
Al blinked at the question. Was he really going to lecture her about something that wouldn't go on her record? The police had been kind enough to let them go before anything went the way of official. That didn't exactly make it right, but she was allowed to mess up a little. Maybe that was part of the problem; she'd never really messed up in her life. The last time, if it could be considered a mess up at all, was getting drunk and kissing him, and that had actually turned out to be a good thing, so far.
"It was just the one time. I guess I should have called about staying, but..I guess I'm just waiting for you to get tired of my mooching off you and acting as if I depend on you. I don't want you to think that I can't take care of myself, or that I need you so much I can't spend time on my own for more than a weekend." The last time they'd been apart was her visit to LA. And any time he had a job that wasn't in New Orleans.
He gave her a sideways look. "Even if you were mooching off of me - which you're not, trust me - why would I get tired of that? I like having you around, you know. I like it a lot." Maybe too much? Yes, that was possible. He was used to having her around now, and not having her around harder for him than he first thought. Reminded him too much of how things were after Elena died. Life was better, and easier, when Al was there. He sighed. "And, well, if one of us is dependent, it's me. I pretty much guilted you into coming back."
"Guilted? No. I was being reckless, staying there. I don't exactly have the money. Smart Allison Peabody would get a job as an adjunct for a little while, or force herself to work at some public school. Smart Allison Peabody would save up money to pay for something she can't exactly pay for right now. But, you can't do that these days. You can't save anything; it just goes so quickly. I'll teach then I'll get tenure or something. I'd never get my Ph.D. Farley, I really want my Ph.D. I need it, which sounds ridiculous." Al shook her head. "I know it does. I know I sound crazy when I talk about it."
She stopped and looked at him, something might have finally sunk in. "You are dependent on me? Seriously? How are you dependent on me?"
"I don't know, I guess I just wasn't thinking. Or I was thinking too much. Something like that, anyway." He looked at her carefully, and reached out to touch her cheek. "You really liked it that much?" His voice was soft, but there was a hint of something else to it. He had half of an idea; the other half depended on her answer.
"Farley, I think I have twenty dollars to my name right now I liked it so much. I was going to have to come back soon anyway, but I would have stayed longer if I could have. Padme likes it, too, which I think has a lot to do with how everything feels older and used. As if time existed there and pe..Yes. I really liked it there." Al leaned into the touch.
He smiled and shrugged a little. "Then I don't see why we don't just move there. I've been a couple times and liked it, and I think I could use a change, honestly. I've been here my whole life - it's about time I tried somewhere new." His smile fell slightly, and he looked at her seriously. "Is that okay - I mean, d'you think we could make that work?"
That really wasn't what Al was expecting him to say. In fact, she was expecting him to give her some weird song and dance and let her be on her merry way. It wasn't that Al thought Farley didn't care for her; he told her that he loved her, but he had almost as much baggage as she did - lucky him, most of his had to do with being Farley Trask not Commissioner Gordon. As if that really made it all better, mean more. Al, the romantic that was a strange mix of grad student and ex-senator, had hoped he'd just ask her to stay or maybe say he'd visit, or something. But, to move...
"You'd do that? For me? Or us? Farley, your family's here. Lilia's only ever known here. You would leave that, uproot her, to be with me?" Al looked away; funny, she was now the one having relationship/commitment issues. The last man to leave anything for her, Padme, had ended up being the scourge of the galaxy.
"I'm not saying it'd be easy, but yeah, I would. We could still visit, and Lilia, well. It might be hard for her at first, but as long as she has us, she'll be fine. It'll take some time to actually make the move, too, so it's not like it'd be a huge change overnight." He touched her chin to get her to look at him again. "If that's what you want, I'll do it."
"And how would you live, we live? Ruining my finances and killing my credit, doing that to myself is one thing, but how will we afford it? I dont' even know if I could get into one of those schools. I think I could, but I'm not in yet. I finished the applications. So, they're in. I won't know anything for a while. To move and not get in. I don't even know how to afford it." Al looked at him; there were tears in her eyes, but she wasn't crying. She wasn't going to cry on him, not right now. "You're not doing this because you just don't want to be alone, are you?"
He shook his head. "No, that's not why. I'm doing this because I love you, and I want you to be happy, and if you're happiest in England, then that's where we'll go." He pulled her into a hug and kissed the top of her head. "And, you know, we don't have to decided this now. We can wait, until you know for sure if you can go to school there. And until then, you don't have to worry about money either. This is all one big hypothetical right now - we can worry later, all right?"
Al let him pull her close, and she curled up him easily enough. Her head rested against his shoulder. She'd applied to a few other places, yet another reason for her bank account to be so low. She'd taken care of what she needed to do. Her arms slid around him to hold him close.
"I want you happy too. You'd say something if you weren't, wouldn't you?" She pulled free enough to see his face. To see if he was lying. Could she even tell?
"Yeah, of course I would." He smiled, a little bemusedly. "If I were unhappy, you'd know it, believe me. I'm not the kind of person who hides that sort of thing." He gave her a quick kiss and sighed, contentedly this time. "Now, let's go home, shall we?"