Sarah Miller // Stephanie Brown (itseggplant) wrote in ourtrueselves, @ 2009-07-24 18:57:00 |
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Entry tags: | james miller, sarah evans |
who → Sarah Evans & James Miller
what → Shopping in New York.
when → Tuesday 14th July (Backdated).
where → Outside of GiGi's cafe in New York
warnings → None!
status → Complete.
When you were downtown this far, James had always found it easier to walk. Despite the nice heat, he could smell the road works and car fumes wafting up 3rd as he walked down it. He was sure he'd told the Girl Wonder to meet him outside of Gigi's at two, giving them a solid few of hours to find a suit that didn't make him want to talk like his balls were in a vice and something that made note of her bosom. Bosom? He added mentally, Am I getting into parent speak already? Lets make that 'shows off her boobs'. Loitering around in the street was like people watching, but he figured it wouldn't be too long before she showed up. While they weren't natives of the busy bustle, they'd both admitted to loving it. Maybe they'd have time to do something more fun later. After all, it was just a couple of outfits, how long could it take? Sarah liked walking in the city; as long as she could get somewhere in time and it wasn’t over the river she’d rather walk there than take a cab or the subway. Plus, have you ever been on any subway system in the middle of summer? It wasn’t fun for anyone. Plus, she loved the city, even the roadworks, the smell of hotdog carts and the steam rising up from the streets. It was home, that was pretty much all there was to it. There was a mental list of things she needed to get before going to Albany, a dress that didn’t make her look like a hooker or a princess was number one, followed by everything else. She wouldn’t mind a new pair of shoes either, to go with the dress. Or at least, that would be the excuse. She checked her watch and hurried her pace slightly, but it didn’t take her long to get there. “Hey, Jaybird. Been waiting long?” "About seventeen minutes. You getting this internal clock deal as well? Woke up with it about two days ago and suddenly I'm mentally knowing the time. It's nuts." Not any more nuts than anything else around here, but short of them going to buy shortpants and masks, at least it couldn't get any weirder. Or so he hoped. It was never a good idea to end your mental process there, because somehow, it would bite your in the ass. James gave her a soft punch to the arm, "C'mon, Girl Wonder. Lead me to my execution." Never mind the fact it'd been his idea. No, it had been his mothers idea and he was starting to regret having mentioned 'the Spain girl' to them at all. It wasn't that he was embarrassed or anything, but if there was a sure sign of being whipped by a girl, it was carrying her bags around after her at Bloomingdales. She could carry her own bags. It was a comprimise. “No internal clock yet, but I think I know how to play the piano. I’m sure it’ll come in handy if I ever need to improvise at parties, or if I’m at a Broadway musical and the pianist breaks their fingers and they need someone to make their big break.” She joked. There were weirder things to know, like how to check fingerprints under a time limit and other weird criminology topics that still hadn’t come up at college and weren’t proving to be at all useful. Sarah returned the punch before she kissed him briefly and impulsively, because she wanted to and she was pretty sure she could get away with it. “It won’t be that bad.” She promised. “If you get bored then I’ll let you watch me change or something equally frustrating yet entertaining.” She grinned at him, “Come on, Bloomingdales awaits, and these clothes aren’t going to buy themselves and walk out of the shop and come find us.” James grinned, "Oh, yeah. Sarah Evans, the big star on Broadway, has just made her stunning debut on Broadway and has had many a compliment about her fast fingers." It could be a Robin thing, this ability to turn just about anything into a really bad pun. Maybe it was a Batman thing, but considering he'd had no particular desire to become a Gat Bat, he was going to go with the little birdie instead. He crossed the street to head over to the opening doors. At least it didn't look too packed. "I don't mind seeing you change. Possibly I'm a closet masochist. Would explain fates way of choosing who I got in the back of my head, if you believe in that kind of thing." Secretly, he kind of thought that if something could actually cause clothes in your size to walk to your door and not worry about the crap that usually came with internet or phone orders they'd probably make a fortune. Clearly, they needed robots or something, but then they might actually take over and they'd have to become vigilantes. It was almost worth it! “I have had several compliments about my fingering technique,” She wiggled her fingers in front of his face. “I obviously have what it takes to be an excellent pianist. Or to be able to handle one anyway.” It was definitely a Robin thing to pun badly, with no care for the people around her, or how bad the puns would be. “Is there anything you’d mind doing with me?” She asked. She tried not to get distracted with the idea of starting off by buying a new purse, or a new pair of sunglasses, or even some perfume, and James was so screwed if he thought he was getting out of here quickly. Poor guy, Sarah almost felt sorry for what he’d just got himself into. “Not sure it’s fate. I mostly think it’s just fucking nuts, and a lot of coincidences all mixed up with some weird magic that I’ll never understand, even if Andi uses small words and visual aids to help me out.” "I walked right into that, didn't I? Wasn't Andi, was it? I figured it wasn't since you're trying to find her a mate." If James could have been anymore technical about the whole thing, he didn't know how. He sounded ridiculous. This is what happened when you mixed two personalities that have a tendency to clash. You said stupid things. Or maybe that was just him and he needed a good excuse. It was an excuse, anyway. He gave her a round of applause as they headed to lifts, "Very nice, good form and a straight face. Somewhere, Dickiebird is smiling and he doesn't know why." Assuming there was one out there. There probably was. "I dunno," He shrugged, "I don't think I could do spa treatments. I'm too damn pretty as it is, what do I need a spa for?" He started to look for a map for this place, so he could plan the routes and his escape. "Didn't think Andi was a visual aids kid of gal. Figured her more for 'hits around the head when you get it wrong'." “I don’t want to say anything that might ruin your little late night fantasies so I’m not gonna answer that,” Sarah grinned. “And I’m not finding her a mate, I’m finding her a ‘travel companion’-” She even included the finger quotes around the words “-after I joked that we needed to hold auditions for one. She should really know better than to encourage me when I’m in a silly mood, it’s not like I have many limits.” “I’ve been practicing my pun presentation in front of the mirror,” She deadpanned. “So thanks for noticing.” “They do more than facials, they also do massages and waxing,” She tried to hide her small smile. “Next time I go, I’ll book you in to get your legs waxed.” She glanced at the map, “We should get your stuff first, it’ll probably take less time and then you can always fuck off if you get bored out of your mind.” She shrugged, “As for Andi, it depends how much she likes you. Mostly she just mocks you until you get it right.” "I am not one of those guys who sits up all night having lesbian fantasies. If I wanted that, I know where to get the porn." The second it was out of his mouth, he realised there was an elderly woman staring at him and trying to keep a straight face, he gave his ponciest "How'd'you do?" before pulling at Sarahs arm to move at least a few rails away so he could get the gigles over and done with. "Do you have any limits?" James asked her, in amusement. "You just admitted that you practice puns in the mirror. Sometimes I do little dances, but I don't practice puns. You gotta draw a line somewhere." "I don't wax. I have a close, personal relationship with my hair and they don't like to be ripped away by some chick who doesn't speak good English." She did make a good point. "Alright, then. I gotta find an acceptable suit without it making it look as if I'm coming out instead of going out." Never an easy task. He snorted, "Andi likes people? Seriously?" Sarah put her hand up to her mouth and tried, and failed, to stifle her giggles. “Oh god, her face. You really should watch what you’re saying, Jaybird,” She pressed her face against his shoulder and continued to laugh. “You- oh god, it’s fine, I’m calming down now.” She sniggered. “Really.” “I have limits, I just haven’t found them yet.” She shrugged. “I do dances too, but that’s usually when there’s loud music and I’m singing into my hairbrush. I’m allowed my girly moments.” She waved off the comment, “I’m hot, I can get away with it.” “Bikini waxes are never fun, either. I have no idea why I put myself through it.” She looked him over, “That shouldn’t be too difficult, although if this gives me an excuse to check out your ass in suits all day then I’m going to be have a lot of fun!” “She likes me. That counts, right?” "I should've given her the URL," James said, with a bemused sneer. That was the great thing about New York, it was so easy yet so hard to shock people. You really had to savour it when you managed it. Then he bent over into a fit of laughter, because he couldn't keep that look forever. He was never much of a straight man. "Do you want to find them? I'd think to be limited would really annoy me." He didn't want to know his limitations, because then life would be hopelessly predictable and he didn't like the idea of being predictable. "You're hot and girly. Make sure you remember that when you're picking out an outfit. Give the golden oldies back home, emphasis on not my parents, something to sit up and take notice with." "You really put yourself through that? Maybe you're the masochist." He tried to locate where the suits were, "Alright, I have a confession to make: I have never shopped for a suit in my life. I don't think I've ever been in this shop before. So, I need all the help I can get, basically." James snorted, "I suppose you count. Does she like anyone else? Inanimate objects? The vaccuum, maybe?" Sarah just laughed harder at the suggestion and it took her a few seconds to compose herself while sales assistants begun to look in their direction, “Okay, no more porn talk around little old ladies, or we’re not gonna get anything done and we’ll be stuck here forever.” “I’m going to keep pushing until I do, it’ll either happen or it won’t,” Sarah wasn’t bothered either way. The point was that she didn’t know what they were now, and she didn’t exactly live for the future. Planning too far ahead didn’t lead to anything apart from disappointment. “I was going to go for something short. Maybe something tight. I’m going for sexy but classy rather than looking like a hooker. Don’t worry; I’m sure it’ll end up giving someone a bit of a thrill.” “Nah, just a girl. The things I put myself through to look this hot, you have no idea.” Sarah bit her bottom lip to stop herself from laughing, it wasn’t fair to mock him about something like that, and she was in a good mood which was working in his favour this afternoon. “Okay, I shop here regularly, and while I’m not an expert on menswear, I know how to talk to sales assistants and I know a thing or two about clothes. You’re in very capable hands.” She took his arm and led him in the direction of the suits. “So, whose idea was it to make you buy a suit then?” “I think she likes Jax, and the new Josh. Batman two point whatever.” "Spoil my fun," James winked at her, but she had a point. He didn't want to be stuck here forever. "There is a thin line between classy and hooker, I admit. It's a line I'm willing to tread lightly upon." For obvious reasons, most of them involving seeing her try and function down at the bar at the corner in one of those short dresses. Possibly also in some heels, but he didn't want her to break her neck. He was kind of fond of her; probably a little too fond, but when life gives you a hard time, you fuck it, right? "Makes me glad to be a guy, then. Not that I wasn't already. I wouldn't like to have a girl in here. She'd probably be a huge cock block." He shuddered at the very thought of it. "Oh, laugh! You might as well!" He through his hands in the air in a show of dramatics. "I was just asking for your help to burst my Bloomingdales bubble or cherry or whatever." He took her arm, "I'm going to be twenty next week and apparently, and by apparently I mean my Dad, a young man should have a suit. It was either this or Mom buy it and she still thinks tarttan is a good idea." He gave her a look, "I thought Dick was BatTwo. Fucking Universe changes." “It depends how fancy the dress needs to be as to how closely I can walk that line. If you’re in a suit then I think I should probably look more classy than hooker. On the upside, it’s summer and most of the dresses are really short this season. So you’ll at least get an excellent view of my legs.” She smiled. If he was willing to let her talk about clothes then she wasn’t about to let the opportunity slide. “I’ll even try to make sure that the heels don’t make me tower over you.” Sarah laughed, but took his hands and smiled brightly at him, “Okay, I’m taking your Bloomingdales virginity. It’s a hard job but I’ll promise to be gentle,” She said, letting go of his hands and looped her arm through his. “Tartan is so totally not a good look for anyone. Even a young man such as yourself. Does your dad imagine you’ll be going to many obnoxious parties?” She took him over to the suits and began looking through them. “I’m taking it you want a black suit, right?” “Bat two, three, four thousand. Who the hell cares?” She shrugged. "I'm wearing a shirt and pants. Which is more than what I wore at my last birthday." The less said about James' nineteenth birthday, the better. He was sure that girl found her braces eventually but he never did figure out how she got a hold of his socks, of all things. "Hey!" He gave Sarah a good, but still playful shove, "You are not that tall, Sarah. And I'm not that much of a fucking midget either." "As hard is it is, I'm sure I'll come to enjoy it," James had to snicker, because trying to outpun a Robin was undoable. Now there were two of them! The world was doomed. "A 'young man'?" He raised his eyebrows at what he imagined was Sarah's 'parent speak'. "I dunno what my Dad thinks. He's my Dad. I see him on the stairs sometimes and occationally we have dinner, but all in all, we don't really see eachother. I don't think I know him enough." "Once you go bat..." He had to laugh to himself. "Yeah, let's go force me into a suit." “If I had my way it’d be more than you’d be wearing for this birthday too,” Sarah pointed out. “It just sucks for both of us that I had nothing to do with the party planning.” She shoved him back playfully, who cares if they started making a scene by pushing each other around? “I have heels that make me top six two, so do you want to maybe rethink that? ‘Cause I could probably manage to find platforms or something that make me even taller.” She smirked. “And I am that tall. For a chick.” “I promise to make it a very pleasurable experience.” Sarah promised. She shrugged her shoulders at his look and made a show of actually looking at the clothes. That was why they were here, right? “I dunno, maybe he’s thinking more about job interviews or something practical like that. Although I’m gonna try to use this as an excuse to drag you to any function my mom makes me go to. You’ve gotta love the Upper East Side.” Honestly she hated attending them on the few occasions that she was talked into it, but the thought of James at any of those events made her want to laugh. No doubt someone would have aneurism by the end of the night. “I prefer Robins.” She smiled. “Yeah, just pick one already. I think it would be a bit weird if I actually picked out your clothes for you. Even if I probably have better taste.” She teased. "Oooh, I love it when you get fiesty!" James picked up a pinstripe suit and showed it off at her, putting on a terrible noir gangster accent, "What d'ya think, my li'l chickadee?" He was starting to wish he hadn't agreed this. When had it changed from being that a guy would wear a simple black suit to head out? Now you had to check everything. Fucking disgraceful. "Don't wear big heels, I'll feel the want to pick you up all night and as lenient as the folks are, they probably aren't going to appreciate that one." He couldn't say he had much experience in the Upper East Side, but he could take her very sarcastic word for it. She would know. "Is this where I make some godawful pun about how you taste, Sar?" He asked, looking back at her. He picked out a black suit - that was the stuff. It even had tails! How retro was that! "What about this?" “You’ll be beating the babes off with a stick, sweetheart.” Sarah said, adopting a gangster accent of her own for a moment before she started laughing. Chickadee, really? “Try it on, just don’t call me chickadee again. I think I’d die laughing.” She tried to mentally dress him in it but was having a few problems actually imagining him in any kind of suit. “What kind of pick up? Hitting on or will you try to put me over your shoulder? ‘Cause I think the last one would cause me to flash my panties.” She grinned. “And the first one isn’t really putting me off.” “If you must, but I know I taste good.” Sarah said, still grinning. “Tails? They’ll obscure the view of your ass, but I kinda want to see if you can pull it off. And I like the black.” "Die laughing! Insensitive, aren't you?!" But James was laughing himself. No one could say he didn't have a sense of humour in relation to this crap. Though the idea of going as mobsters to some party didn't half sound fun. They could maybe talk Sabrina and the Dork Knight into joining them. It would suit that lot, wouldn't it? "The second one," He teased, striking poses with the suit up against him. He quite liked it. It had a certain eclectic charm which was roughly translated into it would be funny as hell. "And if I wanted the restaurant to see your panties, I'd just take them down." Possibly with his teeth but he was slightly afraid of what his parents might say to that. Only slightly, mind you. "Yes, opening like the petals of a beautiful flower to produce honey and all that bullshit," James noted with a twirl and a nod, "Okay, this one it is!" “Aww, sweetie, if you wanted to fuck a sensitive girl then you should hang around bookstores and wait for a cute little virgin with pigtails to glance at you,” Sarah teased. “Of course, you’d end up with a white picket fence, 2.4 kids and a dog. All of which would amuse the hell outta me, I gotta admit.” “Do you want a top hat to go with the tails? And are you thinking of a tie, a bow tie and what kind of shirt, like one that needs cufflinks or whatever?” It was possible that Sarah knew a little too much about clothes. Just a bit. “What makes you think I’d let you take my panties off in front of your parents?” There was no problem with him doing it in the restaurant, but there were some things that you probably shouldn’t do in front of parents. “So I’m not seeing the problem with wearing heels. I don’t care if you spend the whole time hitting on me.” “I said good, not like a cliché. And flowers don’t produce honey, if anything they produce nectar. So the cliché’s fucking stupid anyway,” She said. “Wow. You made a clothing decision. Did it hurt? Do you feel okay? Need to sit down?” "I don't get the virgin appeal," James aid, putting one hand in the air and waving it like that explained the whole distaste for the whole idea, "It's too messy." Figuratively speaking, of course. "I don't think a hat would suit my staaahture," He drawled, shrugging at the very idea of it. "I'll just put on a a shirt. I'm not wearing a tie. Or a dickie," He had to snort at his own joke, because really, she made it far too easy. "I could be subtle about getting rid of your undies," He huffed, like it was some kind of affront to imply he couldn't be really subtle. It didn't matter if she was kind of right. "Are you getting something low-cut?" "Yeah, it is." James had to agree with her there. "I'm fine. Let's get your clothes and get the fuck out of here!" “Some guys like their girls unspoiled and pure.” And distaste practically oozed from the comment. “It can be with virgin guys. Coming before you’re in a girl isn’t a turn on. As surprising as that might be.” Sarah groaned at the pun and put her hand to her face for a moment, “Bad pun, Jaybird.” She said. “Oh really, and how would you subtly get rid of them in front of your parents? I know restaurants are for eating out, and you can always finger your food-” and no, she didn’t feel bad about those puns “-but not in front of parents. Even if it’s your birthday.” She made a show of thinking about it. “Short hemlines, low-cut dresses, but what if I give someone a heart attack? Can I live with that? Hmm… I’m thinking yes, I can.” She took his arm and directed him towards the ladies fashion, “You poor boy, you have no idea what you just got yourself into. Dresses, skirts, heels, and underwear. You’re so screwed.” "I was never that bad!" James said, crossing his arms (which wasn't easy considering there was a suit in it) and he was adamant that he wasn't. He'd at least gotten it in there beforehand. James had to laugh. She was upping her game today, wasn't she? If the world could be ended by the sheer amount of puns, they better get ready for an apocalypse. "I wasn't planning on doing that in front of my parents," He made a 'yuck' face, sticking his tongue out. "They won't be around the whole night. We can go out after dinner." They could hit the town. The town wouldn't be able to handle it though. He looked at the section with some apprehention, "Maybe I should just wait out here." “Of course you weren’t, babe.” The only way she could have sounded more like she was humouring him was if she patted him on the head, but she held herself back. Just. “All guys’ve gotta learn sometime and you’ve got fucking excellent stamina now so why the hell would I care what you were like then?” Sarah stuck her tongue out in response, but brightened at the suggestion of going out after what was likely to be the weirdest dinner she’d ever been to. And she’d been to some really weird dinners in her time. “You wanna hit the bars of Albany? I haven’t done that properly in years,” She said, smiling brightly. “But, damn, I might need to wear shoes I can actually walk in. Fuck. There goes the five inch heels idea.” “Sure, but then you won’t get to watch me try anything on, or get to veto anything you think is too long. I might end up with something floor length that doesn’t show off any skin. How terrible would that be?” She asked. “Come on, it’ll be over quickly and I’ll let you watch if I try anything on.” "I got in there, at least!" James replied, indignantly. He was not going to talk about his stamina or lack off in a place where married people tried to get a thrill and little old ladies tried on skirts. "We'll hit the bars, we'll get drunk and stay up all--" James stopped and cocked his head in a complete 'what the hell' look. "When did you troll the bars of Albany, then?" It wasn't as if they lived states apart or even that far apart in general but if she'd been holding out on her experiences in his home town, he wanted to hear them. "Ha! You're stuck in normal shoes. I have stupid shoes already." James oohed and ahhed for a moment before grinning, "Yeah, alright, Blondie. Let's do this." Fortune favours the brave, after all! “I went to boarding school in Troy, I had friends in Albany and once we had our fake ID’s, and I had corrupted the girls enough to go along with my plan, we hit the bars of Albany,” Sarah grinned. “The first time I got drunk in a bar was in Albany. I just can’t remember which one it was. I think it was also the first time I ended up dancing on a table.” She obviously hadn’t changed much. “I’ve still got friends there; they’ll probably want to tell you stories. Which means you’re not allowed to be in a room with them for more than five minutes.” “I knew I could convince you with the promise of watching me change!” She looked triumphant before heading off to the racks of clothes. She quickly found the short dresses and began to look through them. “So, how short is too short for a dress when you’re meeting somebody’s parents?” She asked, holding one up against her that she’d probably have to be careful walking in, and bending down was completely out of the question. “Or doesn’t it matter?” The dress was very pretty though, so she threw it over an arm and carried on looking. "You can't remember which one?" James snickered, thinking about the first time he got loaded. Come to think of it, he couldn't remember where he was either. Except the smell of cabbage. He couldn't remember why he could remember that but you just went with the flow in these situations. "We need to find these friends and spend excessive amounts of time with them." Suddenly he was glad he wasn't one to be overfamiliar with people. Hopefully that meant that he got all the dir on her and she got none of the really embarrassing stuff on him. "Eh, I'm easy." He wasn't going to bother denying that. "That works, but only if you want my Dad gawping at your undies." If he remembered his specs, anyway. "It doesn't really matter, though. Considering what I usually tell them about college, no matter what you dress like, you'll be amazing and better than they're expecting. Though technically you haven't truly arrived if you haven't scandalised them a little bit!" “Most of the night is kinda blurry, but we did hang out in bars whenever we could. It’s where I perfected the art of not payign for drinks by flirting with boys.” Oh god, she never should have mentioned them to him. This could only end badly. She shook her head, “No, no, no, they’ll tell you stories and I’ll get all embarrassed and there are some things a girl wants to keep a mystery!” And there was probably no way in hell that it wasn’t going to happen now. Fuck. “Just ignore them when they start calling you my boyfriend though. They’ll be worse than Andi, mostly ‘cause there are more of them and they’re not as scared of me as they should be.” “Amazing? Unlikely, babe.” She picked up a couple more dresses and after closely scrutinising them she hung them over her arm. There was nothing wrong with having a little choice, and if anyone could find an occasion to find a tiny dress, it would be her. “See, I was just planning on scandalising them by having really loud sex with you while they were in the house. Does that mean we can’t do that? Damn.” "Girls perogative. It's why god gave you boobs." Boobs that would hopefully be on show tonight as well, but James wasn't about to push his luck. Unless she wanted to go Lady Godiva and in that case, all bets were off. "What could possibly be a mystery after we went to Spain together? Besides, I want to know every, last embarrassing story about you!" He grinned, "After all, you're meeting my folks! What could be worse than that?" Apparently, being called her boyfriend could be worse. "That's the hard thing about friends. They stop being afraid of you once they have the dirt." "We can do it but it won't scandalise them," James was actually pouting about this. "They're on another floor. We hear eachother on the stairs but aside from that, unless they stop to listen or the floor caves in, it won't work." There was a mores the pity on the end of that was almost vocal. "Are you getting all those?" “If I told you then it wouldn’t be a mystery, would it?” There weren’t actually many things that Sarah could class as mysteries. There were just stories she didn’t want him to know yet. “You want to know everything about me? That’s almost sweet, if it was say knowing what my favourite type of chocolate was wasn’t wanting to know about the fact that I’d never turn down a dare.” And she wasn’t about to tell him everything she’d done during games of Truth and Dare. Her friends would probably do that for her. “I know. You think after seeing me get into fights that they’d know better, but no, they still mock me! So unfair.” “I’m just going to pay attention to the part where you said we could that.” She’d just leave it up to her winning personality to shock his parents. Nothing wrong with that. “Yes, I’m getting lots of really short dresses. Stop complaining and help me pick out some fancy bras! Oh! Maybe you can figure out how to undo them while they’re still on the hanger!” She sniggered, it shouldn’t be that fun to mock him about still fumbling with unhooking a bra. James scrunched his eyes in response to that. He could deal with mysteries. He quite liked unravelling them anyway. But it just made things more of a challenge and there was no problems at all with a few challenges. This fucking shopping trip, that was probably going to be one of them at this rate. Though knowing that she never turned down a dare? That could be filed away quite neatly for later. "Are you much of a fighter?" He tried to recollect whether he'd ever seen Sarah's Fists of Fury, but nothing came to mind. "Little louder, Sarah. I don't think the whole store heard about my problems with removing your bra!" If they hadn't then, they were now. Great. Just great. "Come on, lead me to the girls underwear. I'm sure it's not your first time there." “I’ve had my moments, I got into fights in my old neighbourhood. And there was the usual teenage stuff. I didn’t exactly fit in with the kids at my school and it was a total culture shock so it was kinda rocky for a bit.” Sarah shrugged. It hadn’t been a walk in the park when they found out her dad was in jail for murder and not something like tax fraud, well it hadn’t been pretty. “And I’ve made grown men cry with one kick for getting too handsy. But I doubt that counts as fighting and more of a public service.” “They have now, hot stuff.” Sarah laughed and headed over to the lingerie department. “Now, Jaybird, these are bras. They are necessary for comfort but can also look very pretty. They are not to be feared.” She mocked, waving a particularly sheer, lacy bra in his face. "I can see you knocking a few assholes flying in your younger days," James grinned, thinking about the idea of her being all kung fu master with them. Possibly with pigtails and a mini skirt. That or he's been watching anime. "God, I hope someone tries it tonight. I wouldn't mind seeing you destroy someone in public." He wondered briefly if that made him a bad person, but it was a truly fleeting thought. He thought about facepalming but that would involve acknowledging that she was talking to him. Better to go lalala and go with it. He rolled his eyes, taking a step backwards to avoid the Bra Of Lacy Doom and promptly fell into a rack of bras behind him, landing flat on his ass and having knocked a considerable amount of bras onto himself. Just perfect. “Whatever turns you on, babe.” Sarah grinned. It’d happen sooner or later, some guys tended to see a short skirt as an invitation to grope city, she saw their actions as an invitation to unconscious town. “Some of my favourite evenings end with guys in pain. Or dancing on tables, but it’s a different kinda buzz.” Sarah just stared at him for a second, but the image of James on his ass covered in bras only stunned her for a second before she began to laugh, and then she laughed so much that she ended up doubled over gasping for breath. “Bras, the natural enemy of James Miller!” She took a couple of deep breaths before getting out her phone to snap a picture, it’s not like she could let it pass without documenting it. “Need a hand up?” She asked, offering her hand and trying not to dissolve into giggles again. "Thanks," James said, wanting to berate her for laughing at him but even he had to admit, it wasn't often he was sprawled on the floor with womens underwear. He tried to keep it for special occations. Mind you, if he were to find a pile of Sarah's underwear...that was a thought. He thought about rubbing himself where he fell but people might take that the wrong way, in girls lingerie. Taking her hand, he mostly just used it to steady himself as he stood up and looked around to see if anyone had noticed. "Come on, let's get out of here!" He said in a stage whisper, tugging her hand towards a check out before stopping and digesting. "Wait, you table dance? Why have I not seen this?" “You either haven’t got me drunk enough or you haven’t paid enough attention when we’ve gone to clubs.” She wanted to argue and finish shopping but then he’d probably end up getting them both into trouble when the bras suddenly gained sentience and raised up to fight him. Weirder things have probably happened and it wasn’t worth the risk when she could just come back first thing in the morning, without the boy with the bra aversion. “If you’re really lucky I might do it on your birthday.” She put her dresses on the counter, “So, do you always have these kinda problems when you go shopping with girls?” She asked curiously as she took out her wallet and handed over her credit card. Gotta love rich parents who like to buy silence and an appropriate amount of affection. “Or am I just special?” "Maybe I was too drunk," James noted, fetching his own card and trying not to feel like too much of a giant twat or posh bastard while doing so. He needed a suit. He had a suit. He'd also been molested by Bloomingdales Best Bra's, but that was so clearly beyond the point. "Some day, I need to just have coke around you." Suddenly, he felt the need to clarify, "As in the drink. Then I can see what you're like drunk and actually remember it." He was sure anyone else would have given them a wierd look but nada. God bless you, New York and you having bigger freaks to worry about. "Dunno. You just busted by shopping-with-girl virginity. I was told it hurt the first time but I didn't believe them." “I flirt a lot and do stupid shit, but sure if you wanna remember that go for it.” Although that description could also be her sober. Sarah signed for her purchases and put the credit card back in her purse. “Or make sure you take lots of photo’s and videos and have permanent reminders of what it’s like to see me dance on a table. That way you can relive it over, and over again.” “Poor baby. Let’s go back to mine and I’ll make it all worth it.” She took the bag, making him carry it would be way too coupley for her. “I’ll even take my bra off so you don’t have to deal with it. I think you’ve had enough adventures with them for one day.” |