*makes a face like he smells something rotten (and wonders if this is what you look like mid-orgasm? because that is just Not Right. shudder.)*
*as he wipes away fake tears of fake verklemptness with his pinky* Aw. I do live to entertain but...you really don't get out much, do you?
*hops to his feet then* *chipperly* Okay! I'm bored stiff—please, contain yourself, sir—so I'm gonna go now! *under his breath* Note to self: "Gouge out own eyes with rusty spoon" clearly the classy option next time.
*promptly turns on his heel to exit the conference room*