The simplest explanation is usually the correct one, usually, not always. Scepticism is admirable, but it's possible to become dogmatic about it too.
Perhaps it's not her death I'm supposed to help you with, perhaps it's...*Gestures at he doesn't know what. Eru? The Valar? The ether*...all this.
I don't suppose there's any rhyme or reason associated with those who are "picked".
Psychological trauma? There was plenty of that going around during my formative years on Númenor. I realise this must be difficult but did you notice anything after she passed? Anything odd, akin to what happened today?