*does meet your gaze at some point there in the middle, and can do nothing but stare for the duration, all wide-eyed surprise and something very like joy (you say these things and I believe them), and it's a touch of balm for the raw hurts still scraping just under the surface*
*on impulse, slips his hand out from under the pillow and reaches for you, setting his palm against your cheek* *wonderingly* I don't think I've ever done anything to deserve you, Kali. *with just a hint of apology* How do you put up with my half-assing this from a country away?