*looks down at his plate, somewhat surprised to see what he's ordered (or that he's ordered at all)* He does. He needs to know that.
*cuts himself a bite only when he can trust that he is calm and smooth and steady once more* *a little wistfully* [Don't say that too loudly. If she ever comes back, she'll know. Somehow, she'll know.] ( [Boy, do I wish you were here. Both of you. Practical jokes and all.] )