*knows that he should leave now, knows it, because he has heard far too much, and it is never easy (it is impossible) to register, to absorb, to believe that he has misread ... everything ... so spectacularly* *cannot leave because he does not think he can move and the wall is the only thing supporting him now*
*is only faintly aware of Lucas' voice, hushed, still and hesitant* [...if it is inappropriate...] *and now he can see Lucas' face in profile and he is smiling (as well he might)* [You really might consider...] *closes his eyes so that he cannot see that smile (and if you're smiling back at Lucas) but he can still hear Lucas' laughter* [...very relaxing with a glass of wine...] *and his thoughts have become sluggish and his blood is pounding in his ears, making it so hard to hear (because he really thought he was special and his cheeks flush unhappily and he knows he should not be surprised to learn that he is not)* [...it would be no trouble...]