Re: Derek/John
Derek wasn't interested in arguing or should haves. Instead he grabbed John's wrist and pulled him closer so that he could hug him tight. "God, you're so-" He didn't even have words, but he was smiling. He pulled back and stared at his nephew. "There's not a single person who survived Judgment Day who doesn't have those flashbacks, not even Connor. You, for all of you've gone through, have been shielded, and right now, you don't know how glad I am that it's so far from your normal that you need to be told." It was also the reason why he didn't think his nephew could be that leader, at least not now, and hopefully not ever if it meant sparing him some of the trauma.
"I wasn't keeping it a secret, John. It's just... part of life. It is normal for me, so normal that I never even thought that people should know, because ... I guess ... I don't know... I've lived with people who would know, because they went through the same thing." It hadn't even been a conscious decision on his part; he just never had considered that things would be different.
Derek shook his head. "It doesn't matter what she did. She was around the base before I went back, she was at the house, she's there now. I've learned to work with her." The urge to shoot her never faded, though. It was always there, always present. "But I've never forgotten what she told me. Sometimes, they just go bad. Even Connor didn't know why. I keep watching for when she goes bad, because I know what she can do, and killing you... that's... that's the humane act."