TJ Hammond (hammond_tj) wrote in omega_reality, @ 2013-01-25 17:34:00 |
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Entry tags: | *complete, 2013 01, character: thomas hammond |
RP: TJ
Who: TJ Hammond
Where: the House
When: Friday, January 25, 2012 - late, after training
Summary: TJ has a seemingly endless line of demons to fight.
It was out there, beckoning.
As TJ stood under the hot spray of the shower, he tried not to think about it. But, it had been one of those days when he couldn't seem to do anything right. He was bored and distracted and he knew he needed to focus, but he just couldn't no matter how hard he tried. It was frustrating. Travis was patient enough. Deeks seemed to be. But, TJ knew they would only give him so much slack.
Shivering, he braced his hands against the wall and just stood there, letting the water wash away the chill. It had rained some most of the night. But, that wasn't the cause for his chill. It wasn't even physical. He knew that. It was all in his damned head. But, his mind had never been TJ's friend.
And now it whispered to him, reminded him it was just in reach.
Three months. He'd been good for three months, if he didn't count that one accidental power-induced high. But, a single night of unknown indulgence and a few weeks of miserable training, now he couldn't shake that desire as easily. It wasn't constant like it had been in the past. But, on nights like tonight when he was cold and damp and tired, he found himself staring at the stash in his shave kit as if it had all the answers to every problem he'd ever encountered.
Tonight he'd gone so far as to take out the little vial of precious white powder, twirling it between his fingers for several minutes. When he caught himself starting to twist the cap off, he cursed and slammed the vial down onto the counter. He didn't dare keep a hand on it long enough to tighten the cap again. It was too tempting.
Instead, he'd hurriedly gotten into the shower and turned the water on, drowning the moment of weakness.
But, it was still out there.
No matter how long he stayed here, hiding under the water, when he finally emerged, the drugs would still be sitting there, silently waiting for the day he could no longer refuse them.