Really, it shouldn't have been this hard to be sitting this close to another human being -- that wasn't Charlie's way of thinking, ever -- but he felt his chest tighten when Finley took a seat and answered him softly in a way that made it seem like she didn't mind staying. That should not freak him out as much as it did, but because of the dream that kept replaying in his head, Charlie's eyes were just a little too wide, his breath just a little too ragged for him to be calm. He put the cigarette back to his lips to busy himself with something other than screaming or laughing or worse -- crying. Nope, he would definitely not live that down. Why had he gone outside again? Oh, right. Fresh air. That he was currently polluting with his cancer sticks. It still didn't make sense but it was very nearly the only crutch that would help at the moment.
Besides Finley, that is. He looked at her face, turning his head slightly at having to look down at her. He didn't like that. He paid attention to what it was she was saying, but as soon as she finished, he moved over on the steps and patted the place next to him. He gave her an uncharacteristic no-nonsense look while he waited. It wasn't as if Charlie necessarily wanted her closer, he just couldn't shake the uncomfortable feeling of not wanting to look down on anyone right now, much less Finley. "Any of the mistakes I've made in the past could have easily been a downhill slide into something worse," he murmured. It was true, but pretty much anyone alive could say that, couldn't they? Charlie acknowledged the fact that Finley was trying to cheer him up but he was still too fresh out of the dream to really believe her. He took another long pull on his cigarette and held it in, gauging Finley's expression before saying what he couldn't shake. "Trust me when I say that my dream put me much lower than the baddest guy you've ever met," he managed, smoke billowing out of his mouth as he spoke. And yet, Charlie could talk around the issue all day, but that wouldn't fix the problem unless he came out with it. Jai. He could tell his roommate anything, he thought. Maybe that would help. With a wry laugh, Charlie shook his head. "I'd give you all the explicit details, but I doubt you want to hear that." No, what Charlie needed was a distraction. "You have an okay night?" The way he lifted his eyebrows was his only way of pleading for her to change the subject.