It seemed like hours after the words tumbled from her lips before Nyx spoke. Hearing his confused echo, seeing the shock on his face, made Lia feel like her whole world was falling apart in slow motion. All she could do was nod first, knowing he needed no real answer to his repeated question, but figuring she might as well answer anyway. There was a tenseness in the air, a heaviness that came with the unspoken knowledge she knew he was seconds away from voicing. Part of her wished Nyx wouldn't ask, but the part of her that loved him knew it had to be addressed.
She still wasn't prepared for it, though. Lia felt her stomach contract as he stated the obvious, forming it as a question even though they both knew the answer. That assumption made her feel dirty. He wasn't even surprised. He knew what she was like. A filthy slut siren, just like the nastier girls accused her of being. Unable to speak, tears welled in her eyes as she shook her head. Nyx knew the answer, but she wanted to be clear; wanted their to be no confusion that ding her shame. "I'm so sorry, amour. I didn't mean for it up happen. J.A. and I actually haven't had sex in all the times we've been together since I've committed to you," she began, voice trembling as she feared looking up at him. The entire story came pouring out in a rush then. How the thugs had been unable to take no for an answer, how J.A. had saved her, how the cost had been his fundamental sanity. She explained about the vamp out, and Audrey showing up miraculously. It was the other mermaid who had known exactly what the prince needed; what Lia needed.
"I've never been bitten before, you know. I wasn't, I didn't expect that. J.A. needed it, but we didn't think one siren would be a problem. We didn't know Audrey was one, and with the both of us, it was overpowering, I think. And none of us could stop, amour. I didn't know how letting him feed would effect me." Lia's rushed words finished with a wail almost, and she buried her face into his chest as he murmured sweet nothings reassuringly.
It was the feeling of Nyx speaking that brought her head up again. Tears swam in her electric eyes, and she felt her breath shudder at the loving words. Of course he would do whatever she wanted. Of course. "I do not deserve you, mon amour," she whispered, shaking her head. Eyes lowered for a moment before his gentle hands lifted her gaze again.
"I love you, Nyx. You are my life, my love, my soul," she started, voice quivering as she tried to get it out. "I know I have no right to ask this of you, I know it's not fair, but I cant...." Pausing as her voice choked, she swallowed before continuing. "I don't think I can get rid of it. I don't want to." Lia felt like she was going to explode from the emotions swirling through her, and a wave of nausea wracked her so strongly that she nearly lost her ability to stand. Only Nyx's arms kept her up. "I don't know what to do, though. J.A. cant know. He's in no place to know. And I can't take care of this babg right now, not with things the way they are here. I just don't know what I can do to take care of this now; until I'm in a better place to raise it. Hopefully with-" she stopped short of saying you, not knowing if Nyx could ever want her forever after this.