rook {isn't grumpy} (grumbled) wrote in newhavenlogs, @ 2020-06-17 00:16:00 |
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While Rook had kind of always gone in fits and spurts when it came to his social life, it had been a long time since he'd spent two weeks straight at home. He'd blame it on his work schedule, probably, which had, admittedly, been a little more uneven than he was used to, but it wasn't really that. It wasn't even especially Terence either, though that rejection was part of it; he certainly intended to avoid both Liv and Charley's to make sure he didn't run into him. But it was more what the rejection represented. His failings as a boyfriend and just generally not being enough. It had been just him and Maxie for over half his life so he should be used to it, but the fact of the matter was that he was lonely. People seemed to pair up a lot in a town like this, and Rook wanted that. And though he looked, it was pretty clear that no one wanted that with him. So yes, he'd been staying in. Between avoiding Terence and avoiding more rejection, he'd been spending his evenings in with his brother, or watching episodes of shows he'd already seen before, or sleeping. He'd done a lot of sleeping in the name of catching up with the weird schedule the last week or so, whenever he couldn't use work as his excuse. Whatever would work to get out of going anywhere or talking about it, because he didn't want to do that either. Rook knew he had people he could talk to, but he knew what they would say--they'd assure him that nothing was wrong with him and that he should just keep trying. And he was neither ready nor convinced that he hadn't already been rejected by every male 20 or 30 something who was also interested in other males. So even if the problem wasn't him, he was fairly certain he didn't have any other options. On this day off, he'd done basically the same things he'd been doing in his off time the last two weeks: Netflix and 'resting'. Until his brother got home, that is. Rook wasn't usually home when Maxie got off work, and he wished that he was in a better place to appreciate it because he really did like hanging out with Maxie. It was like when they were kids except with less danger. "Hey do you feel like a hamburger or pizza or what tonight?" he asked from the couch as the younger man came inside. He muted the show he was sort-of watching so they wouldn't have to talk over it. |