(Placeholder) (therealcptnmrvl) wrote in newalliance, @ 2012-07-23 14:22:00 |
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Entry tags: | captain marvel |
Who: Carol Danvers
NPCs: --
When: Monday, July 23, 2012
Where: Carol's apartment, NYC, NY
What: Carol writes a letter to Tony Stark and then promptly crumples it up into a ball.
Rating: W for Whibbles
Carol was feeling unusually thoughtful in these last few days and equal parts angry and disgusted with herself. What was it about Tony Stark that she hated so much? Really, the guy had done nothing to her. He had even gone so far as to send her specs of the plane she had been in that was shot down in Afghanistan. And what had she determined? Not a God damn thing. Nothing that Tony hadn't already said.
It wasn't his fault. And she had no one to be angry with but herself. That was a bitter pill to swallow, but something
Settling down at her desk, Carol began to write. It took her a few moments to actually find the the strength to put down on the page all of her thoughts. But once she started writing, the word flowed freely:
Tony,
Where do I even begin? I suppose saying "I’m sorry" is a start.
I’m sorry.
Looking back, I see that my behavior has been out of line. I can no longer keep blaming you for all of those things that happened to me in Afghanistan. As much as I want to, I just can't any more. You had nothing to do with it. But I want you to know how hard its been to reconcile all of it and accept that sometimes bad things just happen for no good God damn reason at all. I wanted to blame you for so long. I wanted to use you as a scapegoat because then if I could say there was a reason for why I could make it make sense. It would take away the sting and all the hurt that I feel every single day.
But no, its not your fault. You had no part in this place. I've learned the hard way that that this was just something that happened. And that's that. Its unfair to put that all on you and I'm sorry for taking it out on you.
I hope you can forgive me for, well, everything and that maybe we can put this all behind us. one day. Hopefully, whats transpired can become one of those incidents that we can use as a springboard for an actual friendship.
And in the pantheon of difficult things to talk about, I think I'm an alcoholic, Tony . I think that sometimes I won't be able to stop. That I can't stop. And I think that I don't want to stop. I think I just want to burn out.
I think I need help.
Maj. Carol Danvers
United States Air Force
When she was finished, however, Carol quickly crumpled the page and threw it away. She needed a drink.