Who: Deadpool NPCs: Frost Giants and Police Officers When: July 18th, 2012 Where: Somewhere outside Metropolis What: Deadpool is not as perturbed by the Frost Giants as other people. In fact, he plays conscience to one. Rating: M for Monkey!
"You call that an ice attack! One good whack with a keyblade and little Haley Joel will be out and raring to go! C'mon Jack Frost, hit em with your Superman impression!" The manic merc spoke at a mile a minute from his perch atop the frost giant's shoulder. Sure he was freezing his bangers and mash off but when was he ever going to get to troll around with an honest to goodness troll? "Or Frost Giant. Whatever. It's not like I actually read Norse Mythology before. I blame the Percy Jackson books. Coulda used more horse mounting a pagan deity in my opinion. Wait.. Note to self. Write Catherine the Great and Loki fan fic. Tell no one."
The large Ice Giant roared in frustration and swiped a massive paw at the merc on his shoulder. Accustomed to this tactic, Wade slid around behind the giant's head and to the other shoulder. He pulled the fake horns from his head and slapped on a head band with a gold ringlet attached to it by way of a piece of coat hanger. "Oh heavens!" He said and touched the back of his hand to his forehead. Someone had the vapors. "That devil over there is just so menacing! But you mustn't lash out at the poor lost soul! Only belief in the higher power of the Flying Spaghetti Monster will save his immortal spirit!" And with that he launched into a string of faux latin as he crossed himself. The mercenary danced just outside the reach of another giant hand and slipped to the other side. The halo was ditched in favor of his horns once more.
"Didja miss me?! Well.. obviously you missed me seeing as I'm not a frozen asphalt pizza right now. But I'm back!" The pitter patter of gun fire drew the giant's attention to a few gutsy patrol men. "Obviously these feebs hadn't heard that ice giant beats lead. I don't blame them. It was in the new DLC pack. Not that many people bought it cause it was rated O for Overpriced. Alright Frostilicus! I choose you! Use Ice Beam!" And with that the Giant stomped on the patrolman and their car in one motion. "Man alive! You didn't obey me! I knew I shoulda stopped at Viridian gym for that final badge."
"Ooooh look! A taco stand! C'mon buddy, lets get a taco! Your treat of course."