"In theory," Makaria said, trying to focus only on the extreme excitement and not the extreme nerves. This would all be so much easier once she understood it! He must think she was so strange and such a fool but it was hard to learn some things!
"I looked up some videos online," she said, watching avidly as he rolled the condom onto his penis. (Why was it so large?? Were they all this large?? Why would they be different sizes anyway, that made no sense! But surely penises and vaginas were built to go together and so this was all normal.) "I didn't- I didn't really like what was happening and- I think maybe sex isn't always like that but I wasn't brave enough to look for some other-" She shifted up the bed a little, slightly further from him. "Is this going to hurt? Should I be ready for it to hurt? I know it's supposed to be nice but... are you sure this is okay?" Makaria knew that she was babbling a little, but the nerves seemed to be taking over. Everything he'd been doing so far felt very very nice but what if that was all a trick and this part felt bad??
"I want to," she added, not wanting him to be sad or confused about her desires here - oh gosh, did she ever have desires! She did certainly want to see what all this fuss was about. "I'm just... unsure about it all."